Being a tantrika, I’m always considering the trade-offs of getting romantically involved with friends and strangers. Sometimes I’m surprised at how and when I feel appropriately motivated to “make a move”.
One night recently, I woke up in the middle of the night and was struck by a Buddhic insight right in my crown chakra. My preference for pure-ish hearted, trustworthy, hard working, creative, driven, focused, etc. women has disqualified almost every would-be suitor I’ve been tempted to pursue. I had been holding out on “making a move” on one of my most dearly respected qualified leads. This flash of insight guided me to make the move and formally invite a romance beyond the friend zone.
My training in tantra has emboldened me to be very direct and not play manipulative games to consciously or unconsciously corner or coerce someone into a love and/or sex trap.
So here was my text:
“Would you be interested/available for a fun-games-only, non exclusive, low maintenance, month-to-month, true love affair with me? If so say yes and I’ll reply with love poetry, if not say no and I’ll be happy to remain friends with the same pre-established non erotic benefit of beholding your beauty with my eyes and not my hands…”
She was flattered, expressed openness and interest, but respectfully declined due to being committed to a monogamous relationship.
I’m proud to have taken this calculated risk. It took nothing away and only added a new dimension of respect and adoration, and affirmed respect and understanding of boundaries.