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Tantra Massage for Healing from Sexual Abuse Trauma with Tiffany Tanner TPP158

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In this episode I have the blessing of speaking with Tiffany Tanner, a certified therapist and tantra massage teacher. I found her powerful article on  Mind Body Green about how tantra massage helped her heal from sexual trauma.

She bravely shares her story of healing from trauma that provides a very compelling and inspiring case study in transmuting a tragedy into a gift that serves the greater good and shifts disempowering victim role into a victor role.

We discuss how tantra massage techniques can effectively move trapped and negative energies from the past into the surface of the mind, body, and present moment. We also talk about how much care before and after is required to better ensure a positive outcomes.

About Tiffany:

Tiffany’s personal healing journey propelled her to become a certified therapist and teacher of Tantra Massage through her beloved school, Somananda Tantra School. She finds great joy in sharing and spreading these spiritually based, life-changing teachings in a pure and authentic way in group retreats and private courses for couples around the world. To learn more about Tiffany, Tantra Massage offerings and upcoming events, visit www.energyalchemy.me.
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Tantra Punk your guide to sexual Liberation healing and empowerment as a certified Tantra counselor and certified permaculture designer I’m here to help you grow spiritually sexually and ecologically my online and in-person counseling sessions and training programs are price to fit any budget I’m looking forward to helping you design and ever more Divine Life Path please send me an email to Ben at Tantra Punk. Com and our journey together will begin podcast I’m joined by Tiffany Tanner today a certified yoga teacher certified tantra massage teacher and certified meditation teacher and I came across her work through one of my Tantra Google Alerts we’re pretty much scouring the web every week for anything new and interesting about the whole Global Tantra movement and that’s how we discovered a lot of great people doing a lot of great work and this really resonates with me the article that I found on mindbodygreen which all linked to in the show notes and it’s about how tantra massage Hercule from sexual trauma and the story that that she shares in that article is really nice really moving so I was I reached out to see if she’ll be want to talk about her journey and what she offers and definitely give us some good contacts for people who are interested in what is tantra massage and how can it be use to heal trauma and so with that said Tiffany would you like to tell us about your background give us kind of the more detailed story about how you overcame that trauma and if so become a service provider in all these beautiful areas when we were talking strictly about sort of the the the trauma itself at happens when I was quite young actually I was 7 or 8 years old it was by a dear friend of mine her father who was obviously a trusted fatherly figure for me I spent a lot of time with her she was my best friend so we were inseparable at that age and yeah it was you know just kind of one of those random days I was over there playing with her and she happened to to go inside for something and I was on the on their property that has like a swing set or playground and I was there just kind of playing and yeah he had invited me into the his Workshop area and of course I didn’t think anything of it he was going to show me something I don’t know what that was now but at the time it sounded very interesting and intriguing so as a child of course joint him that’s how what happened next was obviously very traumatic at that age he did sexually abused me and rape me and yeah and I walked away from that experience clearly confused and I didn’t really tell anybody it was it was very I just remember being very Dazed and Confused after the experience not quite sure what to make of it’s not sure if it was right or wrong because it was my friend’s father you know so you kind of question whether it’s okay or not okay when it’s someone that you trust but yeah I didn’t go through a whole lot of processing I didn’t tell anyone about it I was very worried about my friend getting in trouble and I didn’t want to rock any boats so to speak so that the next memory I had after the the incident was actually I was at my own home and my mom had said that it was seeing we had a scheduled play date with my girlfriend and I just literally went into chaos I I was very uncomfortable I was crying and I said no you have to cancel I locked myself in the bathroom that was a very very clear memory of mine that I locked myself in my bathroom and of course my mom was very confused you know this is my best friend and someone that I was always loving to spend time with so she wasn’t quite sure what had happened she of course questioned me as to whether or not that was you know if anything has happened that she should know about and by that time it was kind of I had suppressed the memory almost rather quickly I I consider it a great blessing and probably a protection mechanism of my Maya I don’t know my my mind my my body and my spirit who’s to say where the protection mechanism comes from but nevertheless I didn’t have a clear recollection as to why don’t want to go play I just knew that there was danger and I needed to stay away no matter what so that was kind of what was at the Forefront of my mind so yeah so I kind of cruise to realize of course it was a bit turbulent for many years but again being so young and didn’t really understand why it was so turbulent I struggled with many things emotionally as a child you know I got into my teenage years and and was less troubled at that time but I also fully engrossed myself in school and boys and work and school work and you know the things that you kind of focus on when you’re a teenager so it’s not really start flooding back to me memories until I was in my 20s I would say and mid-twenties and I just started having memories and feelings and Recollections and I couldn’t really make sense of them obvious they recognized my friend I recognized the father in these memories and these dreams but the idea that something like that could have happened and I wouldn’t have remembered was beyond me I didn’t know that the subconscious mind could do such a thing I thought for sure I would remember it if it really happened so when I started having these dreams these memories these Recollections I kind of dismissed them and thought they were rather ridiculous cuz what girl could possibly forget such a thing and then they it started to become more forthright it started to become more frequent and it came to a point where I was my boyfriend at the time when we were making love the he became the perpetrator he became the father that had raped me and I decided at that point Out Of Reach critical mass that this was definitely something that I needed to explore and look more deeply into so I thought help and that kind of propelled me and began my healing journey and an exploration Journey as well call thank you for sharing that and it’s so I have I can I can commiserate with a lot of that as a Survivor myself and I know it’s a it’s like a very that processive of Discovery is really difficult to reconcile and so I appreciate you just surviving as we always will have to do in and so if you don’t mind could you zoom in a little bit to what the experience was of your partner becoming the perpetrator would that mean that he was exhibiting kind of like hostel or predatory kind of Tendencies or was it just that your mind was kind of swapping the files for the experience that you you couldn’t differentiate or you were kind of having like a flashbacks they were kind of like blurring between the past and the present or how would you describe that so maybe people can start two people maybe who haven’t questioned what some similar experiences might have been and they may be in the same state of kind of denial you can say spray tan because by the way that I said it could leave so it’s good so good to clarify it it more became like a blurry line as to whether I was making love with my boyfriend who was a very sweet heart and soul so there is you know no perpetrator Tendencies on his part and there was nothing difference in our lovemaking or our relationship we have been together for I think three or four years at the time so it’s just the act of love making some sort of stimulated the memories of being raped as a child and so my lover became sort of it there was like this blurry line we’re at moments he looks like my friend’s father and so and obviously why when you see such a thing it definitely throws you off to say the least and and and it was quite shocking at the time, to think what I was thinking of have you ever seen that film Bliss it came out I think in the late nineties and it was like a Hollywood production with some pretty well-known actors and actresses in it pretty much details the whole Arc of recovery from sexual abuse with tantric healing cinematographers it has a very Cinema graphic way of showing in describing exactly what you’re talking about where it’s at one point you not to be not to give the spoiler alert but it’s a married couple and she’s struggling with a lot of internal issues in their kind of in therapy together and she’s inorgasmic and they’re just trying to work through it and then they kind of threw sacred spot massage State end up rupturing this sort of suppressed energy of all of his memories of, and then it just she just becomes flooded by if she has to she has to basically temporary set separate with a partner so she can go into some more Focus human work so how did you were you able to transcend that August now we get into how you were able to to move beyond that into did you regret your relationship survive also that that chapter chapter on my partner at the time was very supportive but the relationship kind of expired not long after that, it was just more of a amicable parting of ways and kind of growing in different directions so I wouldn’t say that it didn’t survive because of the incident because he was very supportive and actually very instrumental in the process and the healing but yeah you know we all grow and evolve in the sometimes that means party way so that we can continue on with life in different directions I’m glad to hear that the that he was supportive when it mattered the most I’m just do you have any tips or from that recollection of time specially for people who were who were supporters of survivors in these these relationship Dynamics any sort of good feedback you could share about what was working for him playing a role in just being present and supportive than studying and learning with you about the whole issue yeah for sure you know when partners are sort of on the the other ends of the spectrum and trying to support other partners that have gone through such experiences men or women I I think number one is to not take anything personally he was very good about that we had a very close to motional energetic and psychic Connection in some ways where he could really see that if there were issues that were stemming or popping up in our relationship that often times they were because of the healing process and the recollection process that I was having to go through so he was really patience and very sweet in that sense and that he could really step back or to take himself out of it not take it personally and realize that there was something much more Global going on and what was happening perhaps between him and I if there is a challenge or a disagreement of some sort that a lot of it was as a result of me having to go through the psychological psychotherapeutic process so I would say number ones not take it personally which is obviously easier easier said than done number 2 is supposed kind of holding the space which I hesitate to use a little bit cuz it’s kind of this new age term that doesn’t have a whole lot of substance unless you really Define what that means but as much as possible just kind of allowing the person to go through the process because there are so many different levels and stages of the healing process from anger to paint to outrage to sadness to having to relive it was awful moment that you just want to forget forget about to forgiveness to love to so many different levels and stages so it’s it’s quite an ask for a partner to support Survivor as you had mentioned or called it before so if you can just hold the space and allow those emotions to come out allow those stages in those levels to evolve in progress there is certainly a light at the end of the tunnel tunnel and there is sort of this shining ending most of the time to the story so I think that’s probably where the two most fundamental and memorable actions or inactions in some cases that my partner took that really supported my healing Journey that is so grateful to hear that and I’ll just add by saying that the statistics of reported sexual abuse cases of boys and girls men and women it’s so high it’s so off-the-charts and that’s under estimating you know not factoring all the people who don’t actually come out and in either respond to a survey or file a police report or no however those studies measure this so I think it’s important that we all kind of probably expect that we’re going to at some point be in a position where if we’re not survivors ourselves we’re going to be carrying closely for someone intimately who has had some level of trauma so yeah it’s going to be making more critical that the work that you’re doing and they were all doing to raise awareness is going to have her clay through through the culture until we get this problem solved so do you want to talk now about how where you started to discover Tantra and kind of what what the steps forward you took to to kind of grow and get into those more the stages you word your mentioning we are getting you know kind of just not not getting over it not not putting it behind you but integrating that the bigger picture and just becoming degree like realizing you become a wounded healer so when I initially started to explore the memories are flooding back and sit to heal this suppressed memory I started with conventional means you know this is the only thing that I really knew about so I started with a psychology and Psychotherapy and I went to life coaching I did a number of different modalities to try to cuz I there’s a part of me somehow even though I don’t know what I know now there is a part of me that subconsciously knew that this was more than just something psychological this is more than just something you know at the Forefront of my subconscious mind this is something that had somehow embedded deeply into my life on many different levels spiritually emotionally mentally sexually physically so there’s a part of me that knew I needed to do more than just talk about it on a couch so to speak I knew that I needed much more than just hypnotherapy for example to really confirm whether the memories I was seeing where real and true and really happens I knew that there was an energetic healing that needed to take place in emotional healing that needed to take place a mental a spiritual a sexual so many different different thing I really over the course of the the healing process and that over many years I did many different Therapies and I have to pay for me personally sure that there were there were certainly times that it was it was hard to handle it was hard to see the truth it was hard to swallow what was coming through but I have to say I’m so grateful and thankful that that memory was depressed for 20-something years because when it’s so fresh and when you’re a child and you don’t have the coping mechanisms for the understanding to get through such an ordeal then you can really carry a much bigger load of baggage for your life then what I probably did so it was a really a God sent that I had suppressed memories for 20 years by the time you’re in your twenties you’re obviously much more mentally aware and emotionally aware and you have a lot more control over what comes through cheer being an end so I the healing process was was quite therapeutic it was quite harmonious I can’t say that there was really a time where I felt overwhelmed by the healing process or felt like I couldn’t do it or it was too much it was step-by-step it was it was a unique experience in something I would never sort of take away from myself because I really feel like it attributed to who I am today and the path that I’m on today so that I find some gratitude and I find an immense amount of forgiveness as well but yeah I began with these conventional means and by the end of the the process which is probably over the course of eight or ten years I really felt like I was in a good place I really felt like I could easily talked about this experience I wasn’t cheering up I didn’t feel like this emotional hang of hurt or pain inside of my being I I was rather relaxed about the topic about the memory about having discussions openly with people so in my mind I had healed it in my mind it was a done deal and I had Unearthed everything that could possibly be on earth and then of course fast forward gosh I don’t know exactly how I found myself in kind of this a relatively good place in my life I have owned I was only my own business I was very successful at what I was doing I was passionate about what I was doing I was loving what I was doing but I always felt like there was something more that I was missing something in the end that there was a purpose that I was really craving and I found myself in a bit of a a spiritual crisis I would call it kind of that who am I and why am I here question it became it kind of consumes me it was it became something that I can no longer just miss or speed I suppose are quiet down with just simple things are with material things or with them you know a bit of yoga this or bit of meditation that or hanging out with friends it be a really deep calling and I found myself at the place where this was non-negotiable now and I had to do something about it and but it didn’t know where to turn I didn’t know what was next and I found myself praying for the first time down on my knees praying and asking something a higher power or God or something for guidance on what was next how to move forward how do I discover the answers to these very broad big life changing questions and I prayed for about 2 weeks and then I found myself on my computer looking on something on YouTube so you know random unrelated YouTube search and on YouTube if you were call there’s like a side panel that gives you suggested videos the subjects suggested videos are in relation to what you’re searching for but in this case it was completely unrelated and I saw this video that was called tantra massage energetic orgasm using tantra massage techniques and it just for some reason really stood out and in again intrigues me and peaked my curiosity and I decided to click on it and yeah that that led me to someone on the Tantra School that’s who this video I checked out his website and I just said you know what I don’t know why but I really need to explore this more I’d never heard of Tantra really I’d never been involved with you and so for me this was it didn’t really make a whole lot of sense but for some reason it felt like it was the answer to my prayers so I did check out his website and there was a course that was coming up in 5 days and Argentina and put attending such a course would be at the time with seemingly impossible I had booked at like a complete my schedule at work was completely booked out for 2 weeks ahead I had eight hours a day clients booked in so the idea of being able to drop all those clients cancel them book a ticket to Argentina take the 10-day course was a bit hard to Fathom at the time but that’s a little voice inside my head said that I must go and I did actually key to that calling I did listen to that voice my ended up there and that’s where I started I took the 10-day tantra massage therapist course so what I experienced there was completely unexpected because again in my mind I had completely healed the sexual Trauma from the past and there was nothing left to discover there is nothing left but as I was going through the tantra massage and working with many different partners and for so many days we were doing you no 3 for massages a day by day6 I had an amazing release an amazing unexpected a healing I guess took place and it was and I knew exactly where it had come from he knew exactly what it had stemmed from I knew that it was related to the sexual trauma and what surprises me is that it was so harmonious it was so peaceful it was as though you kind of said something earlier you said it really beautifully he had like pop to this bubble and it had somehow you’ve been released do you remember what you said done earlier rupturing a sort of feel like there’s so many I have to hold back on how graphic I’ve seen it from my I guess for like a third eye perspective if you would if you think of it from my biomedical perspective you really you really extracting something that is almost like a sister almost like I’m just at the unnatural or invasive growth that is really consuming resources and taking up space and you know stealing energy really so yeah that that care that’s needed to actually explore and find the location of these energetic not sis is another way but it’s not a metaphors but I think the reality is just that it said it’s very Surgical and away is very energetic surgical operation that says that’s nice way of putting it was it was like this you know this growth that had an energetic it wasn’t me August anything physical or tangible by any means but it was embedded deep in the tissues and in the aura and yeah so it it was an energetic manifestation and therefore had to be released energetically and the Tantrum massage course that I was taking was a highly focused and rooted in the principles the original principles the authentic principles of Tantra which is energy so for me that’s all that it took it took just an intense amount of energy work and eventually the same was dislodged but I truly believe I know you’ve probably seen such manifestations be released in a more violent and dramatic way and I have seen that as well but the the school that I studied under was very specific about the the healing and the releases needed to be in a harmonious and peaceful way a lot of dislodging which I know we can’t always control but a lot of these sort of erratic or violence dislodging of these energetic man manifestations can actually in bed the memory Keeper in the tissues in the aura and so it doesn’t fully leave the body in fact it kind of multiplies that right because now you got this traumatic experience from years ago that is coupled by this very violent reaction in the two almost couple with each other and create a new memory alright it’s a very sticky process and certainly I mean there’s there’s times when I feel like it’s ill-advised to for some people you need to have the financial and social support system setup to be able to take time out of your life to process more and more memories start to come up and like you said linger cuz they’re not going to hit it it creates a whole new Trainwreck energetic wiring and a high blood people who are who are doing the work to to create the Sacred Space in containers for that to be actually a beautiful a very beautiful viewing experience is the pike the positive beautiful transformative regenerative trentino transformative experience is actually so beautiful that that it’s easier to let everything just sort of go away in a lot of people that would maybe just do really limited kind of clinical session work with this kind of stuff and then just leave people to their own devices walking back onto the Subway or back to the cubicle and it just isn’t it isn’t advisable so appreciate what you’re saying about that approach that approach in that style honoring that needs help thank you so much for that I’ve seen it to your rights like people that go in and for single sessions and went on and get on the subway it’s quite something and and there’s also you know courses are a tantra massage teachers that teach that actually encourage this like outbursts this screaming in this you know Barry outwardly release of certain memories are traumas and well I see I see the reason like the reasoning behind it I understand the logic behind it but I also don’t think that people really understand as you said this energetic networking that takes place that you know by by doing such acts such hourly ask such kind of violent acts that sits like I said you are coupling a traumatic experience with another traumatic experience kind of a thing and so it kind of a the more Whimsical and then you got to have a head I’ve had to learn to have some humor about this stuff from a greater sort of I guess like I asked for the ecology is is is when it’s kind of a a nerdy term that I like to use but to kind of make bring a little more lightness to it I actually just a thought about it a lot of people who are suffering and I certainly have been suffering for many years of just feeling very alone and you know what I did know about what happened to me which is only kind of scratching the surface was was so grotesque that I didn’t want to even talk about it cuz I feared alienation and you know being vs. Whole shame that that comes from being a Survivor and wanting to you know concealed the truth from yourself and others and even you know Psalm Isadora bless her heart do you know she is alleged to have taken her own life and she was one of the shining stars of the the Neo Tantra Sexual Healing movement and you know I read test Counts from her saying that she was afraid to open up about her history of abuse because who would love me you know and that curse is so profound him to feel like you have to be silent about it cuz you don’t you know if you would even be loved if people would be repulsed by that truth and just with that line of thinking no to wrap up this this and that I have is just that I think it’s a simple connect energetic economic question of if you want to use the word demons which is kind of mythological archetypal thing but but if you we all kind of have some reference point for that but I kind of feel like if it if these are so-called energetic parasites are demons and they’re just they’re feasting on you and a very depleted state where you don’t have the ability to you know to fight them off or release them or move them out of your field then it’s I could see them thinking from their perspective while it’s like there’s no competition here no one’s coming into love you more than we would just like to devour you so you know what you going to do about it and they’re just they’re doing their thing or that this is happening but when you bring in enough I like Amor a counterbalance their act pretty inside of your field with other human beings with the sort of angelic loving energy than their displaced by that love vibration and then the healing experience doesn’t have to be a deeper trauma but it requires like a higher amount and frequency of the love vibration so if that if I can you know the some guiding a guiding Point that’s that’s kind of my one of my conclusions about this and what you’re saying I’m glad that you know you brought that up because it’s such a it’s such a delicate thing not to make it worse than it already is cuz maybe it maybe you’re just let me know so I know there’s people out there who just could not they would probably melt down and probably become almost catatonic or maybe even just they would lose it and and they would have less of a grip on reality and on their you know just trudging through life trying to make it make a living and get by so hard work you know when you have someone guiding you through the process that says really skilled in such a thing then it can be a beautiful experience you know and a very lethargic experienced and almost Blissful and many ways to be able to transform something and transcend something that is you know horrible in the eyes of most and even in our eyes and to make it to come to a point where you could appreciate the experience understand the implications where it comes from why and how it propelled you forward in life and you know where it can lead you I feel is there’s nothing greater than and that it’s truly a gift at least it was for me about just even later instances in life of let’s save the very typical sort of Campus sexual assault and rape and all of it all of the different sexual assault perpetration Zone that Spectrum Austin if it leads someone into their power to become a crisis counselor or a self-defense instructor then it’s a new kind of well if I think it forces people psychologically to to make lemonade out of lemons you know and it fits it it’s certainly I mean I would there were other things I would rather be doing with my life and focusing you know 100% on this on this dimension of healing and and and helping people but we need more Sofia the First Responders to this issue so you know yeah it’s if I see what you’re saying about the just getting you into purpose and you know it’s it’s a scary thought but some people who were who were kind of in that I guess you like you’re saying about holding space being a little bit kind new age and kind of lacking definition it’s a lot of people will say Isabel will you chose to enter this family structure and you chose well in advance you know while you were in spirit form to come into this life and have these experiences so that you could be catalyzed share your gift we should be to kill people and I think there’s got to be some some truth to that that some of us if we can survive it and you know build the strength to become teachers and healers ourselves then we can really fight back in it in a healthy way so do you want to talk about more specifically what you were training entail building what you’re doing now and just how the sort of more than the mechanics of the procedures that you’ve been trained to do and that you’ve experienced then what people can understand about how tantra massage differs from other modalities of healing Bodywork as I mentioned that the very first course I took was this tantra massage therapist coursed through someone on to Tantra school so that really serves two purposes I actually didn’t go because I wanted to become a tantra massage therapist but it was the soonest course I could take and it was regarding tantra massage so for me I went and joined and I’m so glad I did so first and foremost it helps me to heal the last shred of what existed from my sexual trauma my previous sexual trauma which is amazing and of course it created a lot of clarity and realizations as well but secondly I walked away with a tantra massage therapist certificate as well and though I had not intended to really use it or offer it because it’s not something that is widely accepted or even legal in the United States unfortunately I did after sometime after the course I decided that this was something that I wanted to offer to others as well in addition to sports just changed my whole life changed everything changed everything I knew I knew to be true it changed everything I believed it’s opened my eyes to a whole new universe really and so for that reason and because in my mind it was an answer to a prayer I really felt that I needed to stay the course and stick stick on this path that I really needed to dive into these teachings and and continue with the learning so after this tension massage therapist course I actually came back and I closed my business which was quite a dramatic action on my part really really yeah you do. It was not an easy decision of course I I I did actually trying to sell it because it was a thriving business it was very busy and it offered a unique service it was actually in the in the realm of Rehabilitation and healing chronic pain naturally so that is my original backgrounds of speak so it there was a high need for it you know and I I was initially thought you know I’ll just put it up for sale but these things don’t happen so quickly there’s quite a process that you have to go through and you know the longer I held out for the perfect fire so long I was prolonging my my path the next out the Future these teachings and these things that I wanted to learn more and more about so for me after a couple of months of trying to sell it I just said you know it’s not going to be fun it’s not going to be pleasant it’s scary as heck but I’m just going to close it oh I liquidated everything closed it and ever since then I have been taking course after course after course and really focusing on my spiritual life and my spiritual practice after the therapist course after closing my business and tying up all the Loose Ends I then went on to to become a yoga teacher certified yoga teacher a certified tantra massage teacher because I wanted to offer Retreat two people to couple two singles similar to The Retreat that I had experienced I’m and I also became a meditation teacher as well so that’s been my last few years well that’s amazing yeah that’s these are the kind of success stories that really do a lot to ask but she you know sometimes country gets a weird smell media kind of thumb presentation and they’re certainly if there’s actually a lot of surprised that people might be surprised but in in India there’s a lot of extreme legislation even against what’s become a prolific so it is no pattern of of what we what we would call Black Magic and you know the more sort of evil quote spectrum of of from which doctors and just you know really actually anti-black magic supplies that criminalized Tantra in a very real way and I think it’s sad because it’s been both in the West End in the East the the patriarchal forces have driven the goddess worship aspect and they only worship aspect very underground and very you know out of accessibility and so the more patriarchal and more serious just people using the mantras for Trident love spells and even political candidates getting busted for Consulting with these quote God men the word using Tantra Mantra to get them elected into you know shamanic Lee poison their other competitors and stuff so the more we have these really beautiful Redemptive stories of people like you actually having massive profound transformation and bringing back the glory of of a more. You know you could say goddess sent to your door Shakti centered approach to this that that the global PR campaigns it really is you know at least I know before I jumped into this course of my initial course I thought about it like everybody thinks about it you know it’s cuddle parties it’s sexual it’s all about sex it’s it’s similar to Kama Sutra you know it’s unfortunately gotten away from its original authentic spiritual roots and been modernized and adopted so much today and then even gone in the direction of black magic you know it’s it’s just it’s so distorted and too many people don’t realize it initially Tantra was you know this whole and complete comprehensive spiritual system that touched on many things so it touched on astronomy and astrology and energy and Universal forces and purification and living a clean and healthy and Pure Life and meditation and yoga and relationships tantric relationships and what that meant marriage Life Death first pregnancy and complete system where there are authentic and original text that reference all of these things that make up our universe with explicit and expressive teachings on how to manage your life in a spiritual way and unfortunately I don’t know how but over the years over the centuries it’s got introduced to being something sexual so I think it’s important to note that Contra is so much more it’s a system of evolution it can literally take a person from A to Z regardless of what a looks like for you whether you’re you know like me and you who are trying to heal who are survivors of sexual trauma or traumatic experience generally or someone who know just looking for something more in Life or someone who’s looking to have a better relationship or marriage like it could literally just take you from A to Z regardless of where the starting wages yeah you doing it and then I think the the way that that we can have our cake and eat it too as far as the the sexuality piece which I like someone said this to me once you know it’s a kind of absurd that over representation of a sexuality part in the west you know I says westerners have encountered eastern time show where sexuality was more integrated into a whole system like you said a more holistic macro perspective and micro perspective on just a fractal energetic nature of the universe and life and creative forces and just balancing masculine and feminine energy that sexuality is not excluded it’s not over in the size and it’s sort of just imbalance with everything so there wouldn’t be distorted and sort of bloated in a in a healthy kosher but in a culture like we know that the dominant Western Paradigm of sex negativity in the sort of post Victorian repressive even puritanical attitude of sex phobia negativity then it’s the first the second chakra of the West is the one that’s most how to balance the most wounded so that’s kind of where the vacuum brushes to the energy of country Russia’s there and that can be a good thing or bad thing but but the simplest way is good to me was just said hey you know the second the sex chakra is one slice 1/7 of the of the pie of the chakra system so you can’t you have to treat every chakra in the country system of learning about our energetic Anatomy that you have to give equal attention and purification and activation to all of those parts and then you will find that the lower chakras really energized the higher chakras in the higher chakras really inform the activities that you know that we’re driven to do so it’s a it’s a good it’s a tune-up you know it’s a good tune-up when you get it off blowing right it is so true so true cool this is something that I don’t I don’t see being addressed as often as I like and I would just love to get your thoughts on this what I feel is going to be the future of once once we get enough of our survivor you know Ken more up and running with this material and more you know I’m powered then eventually I can kind of see that we’re going to be called to apply these modalities in various ways to address the problem in in prevention and treatment of the actual perpetrators in that could I could see that involving you know people that go in and do prison chaplain work and bring yogurt you know into psychiatric prisons and juvenile sexual perpetrator programs in there you know so many places where there are social workers in criminal justice officials and you know think tanks and ngos and operating all over the world special in places where there’s war-torn extreme violation happening of you know it’s just there’s so many places where if there were a ton of bricks or a task force that we would be deployed to actually on both sides he will the survivors in keep survivors to heal each other and then get the perpetrators working on clearing them each other out and and everybody can then we can weak as a species we can move Beyond this sort of infection of the soul in I’m just going to throw to find people who who have a forward-thinking attitude about this and I’m curious if you’ve given much thought to that sort of dimension of you know this the applications for treatment and prevention of perpetrators and we can just demonize them forever and just pretend they don’t exist and put them in the shadows cuz that just makes it worse right perpetrators by demonizing them you know so there’s certainly a healing that needs to take place and I think that we need to have a bigger broader perspective about our soul contracts in our soul purposes you know is you mentioned earlier that we all whether you believe in reincarnation or not we all come to this particular human life in this particular human body with karmic baggage you know we all come here to live out our previous or current Karma so it’s it’s much bigger than just you know this human being is a bad human being and therefore he’s done something bad or she’s done something bad and you know they need to be demonized and punished it’s it if we could sort of educate Humanity on the principles of Tantra which is energy which is karma which is you know Universal forces which is reincarnation imagine what a different world it would be we would have an entirely different understanding as to why things happen and how people become who they become or why they’ve taken certain actions so in terms of healing perpetrators or offering a long-term solution to rectify this ongoing and kind of issue that keeps it seems to be getting worse more than it seems to be getting better I think for one we need to start from the ground up we need to start with children need to start with our young are use my my teacher is coming on. He has actually a vlog on his YouTube channel and he talks about you know should we bring Tantra into schools when you tell that to the most the the common the modern person they’re going to say absolutely not where I’m going to teach our children about sex but if we can come to a different realization that understanding about what answer truly is an absolutely imagine as a child understanding such things and and also having tools to manage our human existence are human life tools to manage our chakras tools to manage our emotions tool to imagine her to manager and control are mine and that’s really what Tantra can bring so for me it’s it’s let’s start their number one and number two to heal or to hell perpetrators or you know the the mentally ill I don’t you know it’s hard to say where the issue stems from butt certainly you could bring Tantra modalities such as yoga or meditation to the prison system or to the psychological realm or the mental treatments definitely it could help for sure nobody has to be doomed whether you’re a Survivor or perpetrator there’s always time and tools to change so as a Survivor you feel like who’s going to love me and it’s a perpetrator you’re feeling who’s going to love me I’ve done terrific thing right who’s going to love me and so the idea of being able to transform yourself and become a good PR person is almost Beyond your realm and as a Survivor it’s like who’s going to love me this has happened to me you know I’m kind of going into a little bit of this wounded sort of mentality we’ve we’ve got kind of a similar issue but at two ends of the spectrum exactly exactly and then who wins at the end of the day it is like the word I mean some people don’t like the word demons and I had to you know I love her and she was like can we just call him scomi’s or something less aggressive grotesque and yummy I think Gremlins are at 1 am? A tantric Ayahuasca Shaman friend of mine would he would just like to call Don V call somebody on Friendly’s so we’re not loving ourselves not loving each other not figuring out how to bring love to where it’s needed most to the you know that the deepest wounds then then there’s no competition and you know really we have no we almost have no right to lament this crisis if we’re not willing to step up and bring the sun where you know literally where it does the light where the sun don’t shine is what it usually comes down to an important call to action for people who are her doing this work I’ve met you on social worker two are integrating this and then you know what you’re saying about the child development and the schooling at I know Laurie handlers is one of my heroes in his face and she comes from a she’s got a podcast and use one of the most prominent features I believe in that the modern movement and she had to interview with her a while back and cheese it has a background with like really high-level business organization doing the working at one really high level of public policy projects and corporate kind of don’t you call it just management Administration and management of social organization and so she when we were talking it was very no-brainer to her about how you could roll this stuff out where you know the sexuality education doesn’t have to start with the sexual anatomy and the reproductive organs in the act of sex it really when she’s she’s had guest on talking about Teen Tantra in school workshops and people who do like a preschool level approach which is just all about sensation and energetics and consent and sharing in becoming a real master of your emotional landscape in your body and that’s really the prerequisites to be a conscious caring compassionate sensitive a human being that win at the appropriate time of sexual development later in life you’ve actually laid that Foundation to be very conscious and aware of yourself and then you won’t rely on alcohol with say to a to have to be inebriated to open up sexually and that’s you know the cause of so much abuse and Trauma so I think that any of this this the people who are are going to step up and in an adapt used to be called 264 of love where you would as a man or a woman to be really considered you know socially Adept you would be learning to do flower arrangement and working with you know archery and Metallurgy and poetry and so many different balancing of masculine and feminine energy so that by the time you actually we’re getting aroused and turned on and wanted to get it on you would be such a beautiful multi-talented just Renaissance person not so yeah that’s amazing kit will I’m so glad that they were able to cover a lot of the stuff and just extend the conversation and you know we’re about an hour or so if you want it feel free to share any extra thoughts and words of wisdom and then certainly all of the ways that people can be in touch with you and and connect with you so I guess I’d like to maybe just briefly describe tantra massage cuz again it’s one of those things that’s sort of lot of misconceptions regarding tantra massage again it kind of goes more towards the erotic sexual sensual side of things and went and her massages is done properly and with full integration of energy meaning is an energetically based massage then that it’s you’ll soon discover it’s actually not a sexually based or erratically based massage it’s actually built and renowned to provide deep intrinsic healing healing at the energetic level healing at an unprecedented level healing those embryos or the seeds does energetic seeds that have been implanted in our Aura from a lifetime of experiences and situations so it’s really quite a powerful form of Bodywork and healing should be at the Forefront of the the goal I guess I think it’s important to just kind of describes that’s that the purpose tantra massage should be rooted in the foundations and the fundamental components of Tantra which is energy-based and it it needs to abide by certain laws of Tantra so energetic laws for sure but continents right so sexual continents are preserving the Sexual Energy should be at the Forefront of a authentic tantra massage and yeah it’s so for people that are perhaps listening to this podcast in and may be seeking out tantra massage as a healing modality for themselves just some things to keep in mind when you’re searching for a practitioner or therapist to assist you along your healing Journey you want to make sure all they say that the person is skilled and well-trained and that they’re incorporating fundamental principles of Tantra into the tantra massage session so I think that’s as far as how to maybe touch bases with me if it’s something you have questions you’re interested more in learning about tantra massage and what it can bring to you or if it’s the modality that is right for you then I can be reached at energy Alchemy. Me so energy energy Alchemy Alchemy. Me is my website and you can read some description is an articles and whatnot about what exactly is tantra massage and how I personally conducted course that can vary from practitioner to practitioner and I guess last words really bad would just be that there’s there’s always light there’s always a way there’s always something on the other end where you are there you know no clothes Road no one is doomed whether you’re a victim a Survivor a wounded warrior whether you’re a predator or someone who has perhaps puts a person in a situation where sexual abuse was taking place if it doesn’t matter like you there are solutions and there are ways to transform your life and to move forward and a productively healthy successful spiritual loving way so in my mind it’s some no one’s doomed there’s always a way and you just have to be willing to take those next steps there is obviously you do need to be diligent you do need to be dedicated you need to understand it’s going to be challenging it’s not just you know this lovely seamless no way past but I can stay from personal experience and maybe you can to that it’s well worth it what’s on the other side is beyond anything we can buy them and truly amazing truly blissful absolutely yes will beautifully said in great words of wisdom and dime I’m super motivated to coming to this world again unrecognizable as it to it’s enough for my former life I still I believe that anyone is listening to this who is a Survivor even if you know there’s a sort of paradox which is that you know I realized it’s many years ago and it still be kind of my my final response to no to this to wrap this up as yesterday at one point I realized it was really disheartening I realize you don’t even if I could heal and from the trauma and overcome this and and not have it bother me so much or feel like such a dream I was I would still probably never forget it like you can’t put press a button that deletes these files from memory forever you’re going to always have to be shaped by the memory of it but that the more you eat the more of this work that you do tantra massage is it just a great way of looking at it mean if you are doing giving those and receiving those that you know as many days and hours of the week as you can then there is so much light at the end of that tunnel tunnel it’s ongoing Discovery more and more like but you will never actually forget that any of the stuff ever happened you just have a different way of engaging with the energetically and it won’t feel like this black hole every time you have to get sucked into it a trigger of the trauma and put the flip Beauty the thing that motivates me you know I’m beyond that seems like I can never really Escape it escape the knowledge of it but you can’t have the hope and I believe that if we really correct this and we really feel this on it on a world a global level in a general you know with it within the next few hopefully Generations then we will come back if we choose to and reincarnate and then we’ll get a fresh start and we will I think it’s so important to do this work now so that we can be more statistically assured that when we come back into another womb it will be through a nun raped and unmolested body and it when we will be born and live lives there free from that fear and that that trauma so let’s do it no better reason to stay happy and healthy as long as we can to do this work and and be given I don’t know I don’t know what’s in the afterlife but I know that if we come back to earth we can directly affect how the net out our next life actually hands out if we do this karmic clearing work now so yeah that’s that’s the spiritual call to action and thank you so much Tiffany has been great chatting with you and I wish you all the best with all your endeavors and hopefully you know anyting that you have to inform myself in the future please let me know I’ll be happy to have you back to share any new offerings or if you have any creative works that you want to promote then fell means love to hear about it so yeah have a wonderful wonderful rest of your Sunday and will hopefully be in touch again soon thank you for listening to the touch upon podcast please go to www.crunch.com and cook on the Donate button to help support the show in addition to see me and improving the podcast for donations will help establish permaculture goddess Temple every bite ecological employment for single mothers Please Subscribe and share your favorite episodes if you have questions or comments feel free to leave a voicemail at 818-275-1593 or email been a tantra Punk. Com Thomas Day