Tag Archives: resilience

Ben Tantra Punk in the Garden in front of the Pond

Ecological Security, Treeage, Self Quarantine, and more Land Lessons TPP271

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In this episode I share more land lessons and updates focusing on a tree care, self care, overall resilence

My Non Verbatim Show Notes:

Last night, dancing in the night, warm and dry, seizing the night, before pouring rain, but still coming down, went out and planted an array of different varieties of seeds, mostly annual herbs and veggies, to be an understory guild around fruit and nut tree plantings

its been a couple of months, phase in and out of blocks of time doing this rehab on this project, that has had exquisite design implementations, that have just been, when you dance and have romance with nature, things can get ahead of you pretty fast, takes people power once established to do maintenance, more or less light, head, cold, moisture, aspects can be set and forget, stuff that needs to be maintained

I’m coming in as reinforcements, do feng shui, rehab, text book permaculture design system, my triage/treeage, set foot on this property I bow to the ground first evening, celebrating the union, faceplant to the earth, made vows, spirits of the land, ancestors, I will do my best to take care of you if you take care of me, never want to set foot off this property again, not wanting to re enter the mix of the matrix, was barely becoming aware of that thing in china, yeah they’re probably gonna lock it down pretty hard, it was one my radar as a prepper, had been since early stages, now it’s exponentially increasing, I’m piping in the up to the minute facts,

prepper fantasy come to life, first days I was here it was quiet, too quiet, picking up from the colony reality tv show, ran a drill of what is exactly happening right now, both seasons of the show, everyone should watch that to see how to navigate the social politics of extreme austerity, they nailed it, a lot of the social dynamics, check it out

this feels like that situation where you’re gonna have to take inventory of what you can mcguevyer and a-team together, food, shelter, water, etc.

its a fucking miracle, all the stars aligning to put me where I’m at now

tragic irony, paradox, you could be doing everything, could still be infected, its a mind fuck, I feel blessed to at least have for myself the optimism of feeling like I have a survival retreat, if I have to go out and do missions into the matrix I have a place to go back to

I’ve done self quarantine already, have the means to extend that for a long time, financially and with preps stored, continue to cycle through

that sort of recap on this last couple of months, getting on to this land and saying to myself, you better maximize the ecological security, resiliency, and productivity of this land now, so you’re not struggling later in more austere times, so filling up every possible container with water

strategizing on rainwater catchment, looking at overgrown system and having to train the eye and the mind and the deeper settle aspects of intuition to feel into where on this design are the places that need the most love and attention and get the most yield, could be immediate, long term, that’s the triage

that’s the training from first aid in cert, community emergency response team training, anyone who understands triage in a mass casualty event, this site is a mass casualty event for trees that have been chewed bare at the base by adorable critters that I will not by any means ever poison, but will have to develop strategies of what’s gonna make it on its own, war metaphors, if you’re gonna survive here, you’ve got to determine systematically, what gets primary care immediately, literally tagging, this tree’s dead, pull it out, chop and drop, mulch in place, so it doesn’t confuse us as we’re going to find the trees that will make it and then sorting the efforts into what needs the most care now, what is doing okay and can wait a little bit longer, what is barely hanging, maybe a goner, lost cause beyond the point of no return, we’ll do a little bit to keep it alive but can’t over extend resources, sorting the efforts into what needs the most care now, and what is doing okay and can wait longer

may look fine today but need to be maintained to keep that level of vigor

that has been the name of the game out here, stacking sats, hodling crypto, dollar cost averaging, smart trading, holding, risking exposure, social distancing, sanitation, strength of immune system

lot of different rodents, trash heaps, places that need tlc, cautious about dust, stirring up a lot of dried rodent feces and urine, dust masks for that, praying hard, really really meditating on the throat and lungs, not gonna go into my herbal remedy approach

don’t want to make any mistakes in any medical advice or natural medicine remedy advice

so that’s the zone that I have been in, meditating on my health, if you don’t want to end up in the hospital, better not be stupid, careless, move to fast, do something mindless to end up in a hospital where they feed you dead toxic food which lowers your immune system, trapped air flow, you’ll be exposed to virsuses, every pathogen on earth cohabitating there, you don’t want to take the space from someone who needs it, slow the fuck down, mindful slow down, don’t get snagged on rusty chicken wire, don’t stomp on rusty nails move slowly, deliberately

had a few nicks, have strategies for maintaining the surface of my skin, phased there immune responses to various stimuli, various symptoms, I feel like a million dollars right now

not medical advice, timely spiritual practice revelations, maybe things happening for a reason, maybe things being synchronistic, some exciting news

its been a wet dream come true to get the fuck back here from mini mission to babylon, before the rains to get dense polyculture seed mix planting into these large donuts of semi composted wood chip mulch around 20 or 30 beautiful trees, need to be cared for, protected, there needs to be a design consideration for anchoring the human activity to regular maintenance of these young developing trees so they don’t get neglected

treeage pulled out a lot of dead twigs, like profusion test, check of consciousness, methodology of steps to determine the vital signs, without equipment, say you’re in a battle field or disaster situation, doing triage, system of tagging and sorting people who are ambulant, can get up and move, put in an area,people who are alive but can’t move, people in critical state of blood loss or other things, can’t speak but conscious, a whole process, not an expert, doing that with trees, which are dead which are alive, you can slowly apply pressure to tips that look super dry, without ripping off more than necessary, take a dry tip, does it flex, bend, snap off, more resistance there, tiny little scratch test, be careful, mindful, scratch a tiny bit, moist green life, interesting practice of shit, if there is any life left, it may be all the way down in the roots, and not know

don’t yank it out, kick it over, or stomp on it, it will have a chance

is there growth below the graft, we go through that process, determine which as salvageable, probably about 20 cubic yards of wood chip mulch, remnants of a bigger load, composted nicely, it was a good mix, cycling through

full disclosure, went to psytribe valentine’s day party knew at that time it would be basically risking death, if I go to that social event, breaking what I had already been feeling was a need to maintain the social distance

everybody elses winter funk, I felt like a million dollars, but everyone drinking sweetened cocktails, smoking cigarettes, lots of love, like clockwork and orgy of viral spread, as far as I can imagine, at that time no indication of a corona virus case in california, no one in state of panic or alarm, in my heart of hearts with or without corona, you better be self inquisitive, is this something that is going to possibly, its the cost benefit, I gotta see my tribe, I gotta see my people

I thought to myself I could pass on this party, but no I need it, I want it, I will be sad if I don’t go,

so I went I danced all night, best party, best vibes, so much to celebrate, for me, global pandemic looming, we were blissfully ignorant for the most part at that point

or course, like clock work, little scratch in the throat be morning, and also when I slept, I felt like there was a bit of a draft I didn’t account for, oh shit, good thing I’m gonna bug out to this land and be totally isolated, and have practically zero contact with anybody for almost 2 weeks, and that was the drill, that was the self quarantine drill and I went through a bizarre fever, and very very mild upper respiratory, pseudo,, proto coughs that didn’t really take hold

as soon as I got tiny tickle in throat, I said battle mode, self quarantine, no more solid food, not gonna say the herb I used but basically did what you would consider like a ayahuasca dieta, I wanted to connect with some of the herbs of this land and say already, take me I’m yours, if I’m goin out, I’m going out in a beautiful nature place, romance with this new to me herb, highly potent and medicinal and I’m not trying to start an mlm taking about it, also placebo effect, okay, I love myself, I do my absolute best to nurture and support and boost my immune system, this is a test, no fear, no worries, just soldier on, about 36 hour period where I was pretty incapacitated with fever, boiled from the inside out, lymph nodes didn’t swell, wasn’t miserable, almost had no mucus, maybe one night I put some very gentle soft, natural soaping solution onto a bit of paper towel, and inserted to stop one night of a bit of a faucet out of one nostril, then it was fine, little bits of phelm over the course of a couple of weeks, I never get sick, hardly ever have fever, keto paleo, no added sugar, no processed foods

a lot of confidence in my immune system, knowing I’m not constantly inflamed, eliminated grains, legumes, dairy, sugar

we’re talking, fruits, nuts, seeds, berries, mostly fish, some poultry, lots of herbs, not gonna get into specific choices of things

I hunkered down, self quarantine, bona fide drill, real threat, I swabbed that whole party, water filter, washed hands but so much hugging and talking, everybody spraying particles

fever was its own psychedelic experience but I would say over all on scale of 1-10, I was surprised by how mild most of the symptoms were, how limited in duration, whatever it was, there’s no reason for me to believe I had exposed to corona virus, it was more lik ea drill, what was off though is that I wouldn’t normally get sick, I wouldn’t normally be getting sick, I would expect ot be fine, novel, no precedent in the immune system, you don’t get any freebees from immune system, you’re fighting a new…

I don’t have mastery of virology, been studying it, I out on the other side of that, no residue phelgm, I feel this more today like a billlion dollars, not selling any herbal secret, I had a profound experience last night out there, seizing the night, humbled by cold and rain, dry with multiple layers of tactical casual gardening clothes and rain gear

and also knowing you don’t want to be out here to long but you gotta stay warm, you gotta dance to live, dance to stay warm, get seeds in ground before you miss the rains, living on the edge, some people are raiding walmart, I’m out there dancing to stay warm and dry and get seeds in the ground, healthy panic mode

win/win, force multiplier, to say to these trees, you take care of me I take care of you, I love you, this is a beautiful romance, I will nurture you, nourish you, and cherish you and be shaded by you and fed by you and you will be the habitat,

as zanzibar said in a recent podcast, polywombic, helping to create habitat fro wildlife, the frogs and toads, almost to tears, so heart melting, I’m just bumping into them, got my light on, actually squared off with one, I got out of its way, the power of this being in front of me, wow, amazing

a beautiful realm, thrilled to be here, I hope I survive everything, a stay strong, do the ecological magic to work this land, make it abundant, build on the strategy of these trees, we’re gonna guild plant around these trees, establish for myself a daily ish route that are dispersed around

keep fertigated, keep moist, rather than orchard over there that does its thing, irrigated, integrating human pathway daily commute, walking through it, gotta go out to where the trees are, kitchen garden growies, overlaying zones 1 thourgh 3, comingling them

small enough to all be convenient to access not so dispersed that its a big chore, you should be walking, hiking, creating a bunch of mini zone one plantings that will be stitched together through earth works, ponding, fertigation, candy land game board

to me that’s been the most important objective, get to that point, so many critters, no mercy, don’t just get ot have a little raised bed box, your veggie garden nope, it will be pulled from underground, checked from above ground, slithered on, grubbed on, little stems

doesn’t work in this level of wilderness, going to have to plant a huge diverse array of sacrificial planting,s

okay with attracting competitors, be happy they are coming around doing their bits, if you go from seeds, the key leverage point of that is that a lot are dirt cheap you don’t need to be that extravagant

I was thrilled to get to that point to have survived that period of self quarantine, to bond with the herbs o the land and to at the moment of the rains beginning have had the hard and soft scaping rehab triage, new where to go int eh dark, with a headlamp those mulch donuts were my tags on the tree age, visual ques, very systematically, need to draw them out on a pirate treasure map for now its in subconscious

don’t want to forget the ones off the path, have a route that trains me to get to all of them incentivize that habit, bend the rules of permaculture zonation, stretch, this tree needs treatment, or pruning, care, change contours so basin is gonna hold water,

all the care you gotta have a reason to care, go out there, planting things around it, things I’m gonna harvest quickly that’s the name of the game,

what was put into action last night

many reasons in spite of whats happening in the world, to be ecstatic and celebrate in the bitter sweet glory of having earned the privilege and luxury to have at least 75 to 85 percent buffering ot be able to follow the best practices, not have to compromise to much

the worse things get, I can scale into and scale out of the official protocols and restrictions and just try to keep myself on a tight leash to this property

the most tragic irony would be to have done all this work, my lifes work to be

secure ecologically and have this opportunity and then be swept up in net, or do something stupid end up the hospital and then be exposed

whatever I’ve done to build my immune system to this point, it’s all nullified by being hospitalized

this is what’s real, this is as fucking real as it gets part of my strategy to adapt to his moment is to really do the triage on making sure the people I love in the world really know it, making the amends, we don’t know who could be next

instead of worry, do the lower chakra things, focus on security, get that squared away and then really carefully feel into who needs to be reminded of your deep and true love for them

a lot of them are coming to me in my dreams, bubbling up to surface of inbox on their own

this is advice, make every day like valentines day from now until the vaccine an effective vaccine and beyond

no matter what your relationship is to a financial crisis, an epidemic, a pandemic, treat every day like valentines day, say namaste, every day and mean it

 

Mike Antipathy Eco Punk Logo

Forest Love and Rugged Collectivism with Eco-Punk Mike Antipathy TPP269

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In this episode I’m joined by my old dear friend Mike Antipathy for a trip down memory lane back to the eco-punk squatted forests of the pacific northwest

Contact Mike at safetypunk (at) gmail (dot) com

Check out his Eco Punk Column here: http://slugandlettuce.net/columns/eco-punk

My Non Verbatim Show Notes:

Old punk house, portland, or

vegan straight edge, deep ecology

trying to get land as a base to reclaim a bunch of everything

apathy and privilege rant

let’s get together and wreck shit

important for people of extreme left to get a dose of real back woods americana, politics of the constitution, boot strapping businesses, rugged diy attitudes

activist scene run by kids with trust funds

working in the woods cutting down trees

12 of use living in the house

kids traveling to europe, squatting we were stuck just working

bio region, forest, politically, right before WTO, big movement in portand, really exciting, coming off days of early 90s, nazis street fighting

more of a working class artist warehouse, used to ride bikes over there

spurkraft

first permaculture workshop with sasha scatter from icarus project

right as gentrification starting to crack, alberta, warehouse, the maul venue

liberation collective, all ages venues, record stores, collectives, solidarity and comradery across movements

wasn’t infected by super negative elitist eugene vibe

lot of toxicity

pre 9/11 heyday, more breathing room

anarchist collective network, stitch together different activities

the nuge survivalist workshop

backwoods skills

ted nugent documentary, metal heads joke about old rock and metal

he’s a deep character, people love to hate him, proto romance with survivalism

scheduled a workshop, the nuge workshop

school trustafarian crust punks, teach how to each things in the wild

virtues growing up working class white, grow up with guns, fire, chopping wood, machetes, watching red dawn 10,000 times

earth first heyday

Antipathy zine

13 going to record stores, super into Iron Maiden, Twisted Sister, Ozzy Osborne

Dead Kennedys

got out of abuse church, DK album cover, In God We Trust ep

Got that, had that song moral majority, nazi punks fuck off

Black Flag wasted era

Bad Brains

English stuff, Crass, Flux of Pink Indians, Rudimentary Peni

NY hardcore, politics dodgey but man the music

trying to get all the bands and all the music you can get into your head

Icky’s Tea house, 13th and Washington, venues in Eugene

Resist and Exist and Asylum gathering, apocalyptic mad max, profane existence, pull quote, a cross between braveheart and lord of the flies

portland was always weird, oregon’s mountains, everything drains into the columbia, eugene, the willamette, drains to columbia, then the pacific, punks metal heads queers, riot girls, drifted down stream to portland

big enough you could have this punk scene where you never had to associate with anyone else

hang out, you and the hippies, logger kids the smoked weed, eugene still had that, punks all hung out with the hippies, ravers, underground hip hop scene, cross cultural stuff wasn’t happening in portland

eugene had been a very very lefty, warren creek, saving last stands of old growth, feel into that hook line and sinker when I was 18

what if we had punk politics rebellion, bodies between trees and chainsaws, music festival, outreach, literature, speakers, connect kids to something bigger

Chaos Days 95

horror stories of the carnage

flyers for chaos days, 19 we rolled in thick, sf, turned out to be a bust

food not bombs

coming back man what if we did chaos days

get arrested for smart shit, icky’s sunshine the patron saint of all things counter culture, big shout out

just put in on man, I’ll make space for you, put out flyers, ads in maximum rock in roll, profane existence, slug and lettuce, booking

all the sudden 3000 punks from all over the world flooding eugene, raising hell, robbing liquor stores

city council meeting to lift camping ban, running for mayor

resist and exist, the punk scene in the 90s, trauma kids, mental illness

guy got throat slit, someone run over by train, skinhead problem

mutual aid network to defend selves from skin heads

sf scum fucks

horrible gang rape, intense shit

shows shut down

bands show up out of own pockets

road bike around eugene, underneath bridge, dystopia played, fanatics, all kicked off

skin heads showed up, starting shit, gutter punks, scum fucks, got super violent

watching all these gutter punks smashing heads with smilies, pivotal movement

for most of the people who survived times, extreme environments, a lot of us were idealist about a utopian pacifist anarchist, had to be tactical for the shows to happen, how much more anarchy could you get or could you want, we got what we prayed for, we got what we asked for, we just didn’t know at the time that we had it

asylum, chaos punx, train hoppers, amoral gangs, rape and pillage, mauraders, vandals, parasitized, they could have made a movie, decline of western civilization, hollywood drunx period, hdp

punk scene in la now is so good, love it so much

stiff little fingers show all old white people

where are the punks, where are the kids, everyone’s on their phone, filming, no ones dancing

the legend, troll, leader of the drunk punx

strung out, sweet kids

asylum, earth first going through growing pains

punk rock more radical, queer, take earth first to something more radical, bigger better world view than a bunch of straight dudes drinking coors

there’s this old growth, one stand, massive beautiful powerful trees, climbing 12 foot thick doug firs, we should do something about this

music festival in general area

some old log deck clearing, bands playing, workshops, invite all these different things a big presence will be this environmental movement,

sacred land don’t bring alcohol

earth first, going through wanting to have focused gatherings on sacred land, alcohol is really toxic and poison for a lot of native people

found amazing log deck up

not too far from hot springs

bands played all this water, everything was set up, kids from hollywood showed up

scum fuck kids from seattle showed up, turned into a warzone

van of alcohol rolls up, all the pc kids face the trauma kids

one night of bands, political kids fend off gnarly drunk punk trauma kids

giant orgy guy, with pick axe, taxing people for whatever they had, barbarian style

became orgy of violence and debaucherous robbery, primitive weapons

regroup in the city

h2h, the system created them, the system has to deal with them

never wanting to involve authorities in our bubble of anarcho punk utopia, felt we should have might, means, reasoning, collectivized consensus judicial systems to get through anything

at a certain point, it’s over our heads

notion that we should feel bad that we can’t handle the situation, we didn’t create it, the system did

we had that moment

pulled it together, relocate to new location

security meetings, perimeters

good times, hot springs, jumping off train bridge, made out in spin the bottle

bought manowar kinds of metal lp

really important that the music happened

remember driving away from the log deck, bitchin reservoir, Neil brought the food not bombs, legend, big shout out, still living the life,

he’d invite you over to his house to stay, vegan

driving away

whole arizona punk scene, really friendly, really tough

most of those hollywood kids are dead

good training for us wasn’t it

that was fucking raw man

sometimes you think you know what you’re life story is hinged on, the pivot points, now I’m realizing

eugene wasn’t a cult of john zerzan, it was a cult of group think

in the forest my heart chakra began to develop

fabric of punks, earth firsters, fall creek

almost half my life in l.a. I’m only in la because of the follow up

gotta recruit the foot soldiers of the punk movement, either apathetic or hyper political and don’t know what to do except book shows, make donations

the idea of living in off grind, anarchist community of earth first based, that whole tribal community, an experience not a lot of the radical punks got to have, I was blessed to eventually get there

when I first went to fall creek, camped there on and off for months

had that feeling I’ve got to mobilize the punk movement

went on us tour, ended up landing me in la for about 20 years, did bring some people out there

that was the spirit, how do we get these places protected, sorting through some of the really toxic riff raff and get some real eco warriors out there

give ourselves a toast, home break apple cherry cider

raising glass, bringing punks to the front line of fall creek

Mike Antipathy, eco punk column, antipathy zine

fall creek was one of the most dysfunctional fucked up environmental movements of its time, almost entirely staffed by trauma kids, a bunch died, from the trauma the ghosts, the demons they couldn’t escape, you don’t get into this shit unless something has gone really really sideways in your development

its a really good thing that we’re able to transform whatever bad shit happened to us into a desire to make the world a better place, not all of us get out of it

barely made it out of that, big glasses raised to all those people who didn’t make it, they were important

tribute to fall creek, and all the other people we’ve lost

fanzine, like to rant about stuff

look back, fuck

crazy, can’t believe it came out of my mouth, last one came out after 2000

super helpful

slug and lettuce, free newspaper all across the world, seen in south east asia, street punk market, stacks of slug and lettuce, out of the goodness of her heart

asked to write a column

reunification of rural roots, having been raised on a farm

if you think you can do forestry better, get up and do it

followed old generation earth firsters, we’re doing it better

fell into working on logging sites, tree climber, got into that, through that getting bigger and bigger in terms of work I was doing

talk about howling wolves, salmon run coming up the stream

print magazines for the subcultural left, and punk movement

internet, just too much, doesn’t matter

if you were gonna write a zine you had to put art, creativity, research, cut and paste, go places, to produce a zine the effort that would have to be made, was a heart work, don’t want to take that away from people who have blogs on the internet, but something to be said

generation gap between my youth and the new generation

back in my day joke, it was like this, walk 10 miles in the snow to get to school, american men, masculinity, their disgust and disdain at the softness of the next generation and how easy it is, and how they take things for granted and how privileged they are, it’s weird to now get that wisdom

thoughts on current punk scene, millenial, how have the millenials, picked up the culture of punk, amdist all the social media, big data, rigged and engineered algorithms, shadow ban you

where are we at with punk

super into, super into the way the young people are right now

really intense shit happening in the 80s and 90s not really as intense anymore

portland, nazis at shows mid to late 90s, now there’s not

didn’t see faces get stomped on curb, didn’t see heroin

go to a lot of shows, kids are so nice, so conscientious to each other

have more money these days, europe go to big punk fests, things are looking up, punks are leading the way, not doing the vapid shit of the sexy selfies so much

still around the scene, nothing moves me as much as my time, tour in mexico 2003, where I most dedicated most pure hearted, fabric of intergenerational punks, what I had always dreamed up

so cal pride

so much hate on millenials, being spoiled rotten, good to know

hopefully there will be more mentors

brings us through most of the chapters where we had been running in the same circles

get into some politics and some survivalist prepper stuff, debriefing on current events

take radical experiences and politics, cover tattoos and do ballsy work within the system

from that spirit of rugged collectivism, permaculture

zombie apocalypse fantasies where your mind at

wild, go into stores, shelved emptied of dumbest shit

not real scarcity

all the shit is still there, but people are freaked

two weeks a month of groceries so we’re not exposing ourself or contributing to more people dying

this is not the apocalypse I’d imagined I thought it was gonna have a lot more smoke, cop cars, sirens

y2k sitting in our mountain compound, waiting for the glow of burning cities in rural oregon, we were fuckin ready, bunch of dried beans

shit turned out to be a fuckin bust

unsung heros, not a geek or hacker, have to study info security, trying to catch up on what I had not been clued into, steve gibson, security now podcast, people laugh about how y2k was a non event, but only because the engineers busted their ass to make it not be

trippy point, I hear all these whistle blowers talk about how they’ve bungled the pandemic response, which governments have fucked everything up

if you do the proper preventative measures and you’re successful at preventing the catastrophe from happening, people will want to cut your budgets and say you’re wrong because it never happened, the thing you were predicting that you’re urging people to prepare for, if you’re effective at preparing for it and preventing it, then it’s not a thing, and people have cognitive dissonance, so then they get soft

south korea and singapore, more experience with SARS, culture of wearing masks

don’t get trampled on the way to the fema truck

live in a mexican neighborhood, exactly the same, stores are stocked, most people work in fields, not a lot of disposable income to buy all the toilet paper from costco

keeping local

not the apocalypse I wanted, where we got to be warlords

tin foil hat segment

some people scary, depending on where you are on the political spectrum, unraveling of world economy, opportunism, could go on some extreme tin foil hat

tin foil hat adventure

I don’t have much tin foil anymore

just being vegetarian, shopping in bulk, already had the bags of rice, nothing is out of wack, ammo from dead dad

have a 10 year old now, trying to teach him to be a better non toxic man

could be carriers of a virus that’s pretty gnarly

court systems all shut down

completely suspend habeas corpus, no right to speedy trial, indefinitely post poned

poor, mentally ill, mostly brown and black, get rid of the constitution indefinitely, let people linger for low level offenses

system’s even worse than we ever thought it was

not opposed to abolishing prisons, what are thoughts on trying to lesson density of over crowded prison, letting them out early into what, what’s their severance package, where they gonna go

prop 47, all the sudden supposed to let all the drug possession felonies, made it all misdemeanors, lack of treatment

gabor mate, science, trauma, addiction

prosecutors and cops running on 1950s notions, anyone who touches drugs is evil

most people in justice system don’t have experience with drugs and trauma, they should let more prisoners out

prisons make us less safe, prison increasingly traumatized, I don’t know

this whole system was made by slave owners

positive note, decriminalize nature movement, spreading across the nation, decriminalized plant and fungi entheogens

some jurisidictions, diversion programs incorporate trauma healing with entheogens

don’t feel hopeful about it, california is fascist as fuck, last place that does anything healthy with that as a state

state banned gay marriage on purpose in 2008, california is so completely backwards

I don’t think it’s gonna happen

despite people kicking heroin with iboga

not gonna have access to that healing modality, federally still illegal

things are getting worse legally than they ever have been, with exception of immigration

the state is going to take excess in as many directions as they can, then have to be austere in enforcement in other things

numbers of police departments, knocked out because of sick or quarantine

foreshadowing for emergent properties of anarchy that were never imagined

even losing of parking restrictions

dimensions of freedom that are unenforceable

we’re blessed to have the internet as long as it lasts

getting more into traditional survivalist communications, ham radio, late bloomer on, trying to go through thought experiments, what will you never forgive yourself if you don’t have this prep dialed in, you take for granted, you’re be said you didn’t prioritize what that was, everyone has a different checklist

I’m feeling pressure on as general question that can apply to anybody

no easy to cover ass, cover assets, do proper estate planning, what if you can’t do updated last will because you can’t assemble the witness you need to sign the document, government is doing all kinds of digitization of procedures

officially time stamp my intention

whatever is left after paying minimal debt, executor of will, power of attorney they would take some percentage to pay themselves for the time to sort out what intellectual property I have and what potential revenue streams may be funneling into my estate, decided I want whatever is net gain of my estate, to actually be distributed among non profits, I have no heirs, that are individuals, would rather structure something where I can say, here’s a list of non profits, I would want it distributed equally among the, 3 I have in mind are the Red Brigade in lucknow india,sexual abuse and rape survivors banded together to make most bad ass indian version of a riot girl collective, teaching each other self defense and martial arts, self policing neighborhoods, most bad ass warrior kung fu clan, martial arts masters from all over the world have gone to volunteer to train them, and give them seminars, they’ve set up non profit donations, part should go to them, part to the Women’s Visionary Congress, and the Decriminalize nature movement, all these represent what has kept me alive, and allowed me to transcend my traumas, I don’t know if what I said would hold up in any legal proceeding, at least this will exist til the paper work can happen

now everyone has a reason to do the unthinkable, do the estate planning

spoke to mother, here’s my plan, let me know your plan, this is a bridge we have to think about crossing

5 wishes, template to know how you have to frame things like how you want to be buried, what ritual you want around that, so people can’t abuse you after you’re gone, protect your soul:

I want to put this out, time stamping this conversation:

I would like to be cremated, and buried while planting a fruit or nut tree so that I sign can be posted saying here lies ben lawson feel free to piss on his grave and nitrify this fruit tree and if you ever cut it down or let it die, I’m gonna come back and haunt your ass

if you can donate organs donate organs

freeze my brain so my bitcoin holding will be worth gazillions more by the time they thaw me out

been trying to catch up on many years lost on anarcho primitivism versus cryptoanarchism

hacker punks, manifestos of crypto anarchy in early 90s, legacy of hacker collectives, the talk of the wall street billionaires, government officials abandoning their posts to join the movement

this is the thing you could commiserate on, I never believed anything anarchist came up with would be competitive with incumbent systems

they actually built something that was competitive, was able to out compete

line malcolm x once said, make the old system obsolete, they era that we were in , the analogy of how astonishing it is they were able to make millionaires and billionaires out of this hacker implementation of cryptography, it’s like saying food not bombs was so loved and so competitive with mcdonalds, kfc, everyone started showing up and paying everyone at food not bombs, fnb became the cherished favorite food of all americans, you never would have thought that something out of the anarchist caldron of creativity, would actually do that, without brute force, without violence, with an elegant ninja tactic, actually out manuver the system, and give it a run for its money, literally, and that’s what’s happened, something I’ve tried to catch up on, not for everybody to learn all the nuts and bolts, gotta raise the glass to all the geeks and hackers that I’ve always fuckin respected, the ones that told me that I shoulda fuckin paid attention to this and I was too busy huggin trees, I coulda bought those timber sales

thing with environmental movement is that a lot of the stuff we got out of that wasn’t actually what we went in there for, it was all those other lessons, we saved precious few forests but we learned a lot more, that you would never have learned if you were sittin in a dark apartment writing code and buying bitcoin

something to be said about wild forests, skinny dippin in natural waters, and smellin your own body odor and smellin your own shit everyday, those are formative things, that make us better

couldn’t have said it better, love you brother

no small contribution you’ve made to my life

stay wild

always remember, every day when I wake up I remember that quote, whatever keeps the barrel out of your mouth, that’s the proper way to live