In this episode I’m joined by Devika the Techy Tanktrika (devika-singh.com) and Sagrada, for a commentary on the movie the Golden Child which was a favorite movie of mine growing up and is a masterpiece of tantric sexual-spiritual education.
We share our common interests in the themes of the film and share thoughts as it rolls in the background on the significance of each scene as it relates to our life experience in tantra and beyond.
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Tantra Punk your guide to sexual Liberation healing and empowerment as a certified Tantra counselor and certified permaculture designer I’m here to help you grow spiritually sexually and ecologically my online and in-person counseling sessions and training programs are price to fit any budget I’m looking forward to helping you design and ever more Divine Life Path please send me an email to Ben at Tantra Punk. Com and our journey together will begin hello dear beloved’s welcome to Township Punk podcast episode number so yeah it’s going to be around table Extravaganza with this Golden Child movie which is so near and dear to my childhood in which took me like 35 years to decode and now I realize everything everything I’ve ever cared to know about Tantra I learned all ready for my age of eight by Eddie Murphy so go figure you got between Eddie Murphy and and Barney the purple dinosaur you know you heard about that right amazing Barney the purple dinosaur yeah he’s that he’s a tantric sex healing master and you need provides a full-service tantric sex work for women who can afford the the billina and I guess yeah he’s just like he’s got Prana just to spare you know so I can check them out on Twitter to that’s how I that’s how I tracked him down sweet. One of these days we got ya at him and Eddie Murphy anytime you’re welcome on the township of podcasts do this tell us all about how it’s done cool so yeah then so we all at this point I’ve watched this movie probably a hundred times and you all have watched it probably one time each and I introduce it to you for devika because this is kind of like your stick is the the tantric Buddhism and the everything I started to learn from you and that was new to me about Tantra that was very much foodist into nature it would just match up to a lot of the symbolism and mythology and storyline of The Golden Child So before we get started with this this experimental commentary we’re just going to play it in the background and just react to it as it goes along it will will let people know where to queue it up from and make sure we’re all on the base of the same starting point but but before we do that would be great just to have a few thoughts of yours that we could just serve your kind of initial debrief analysis thought stream that comes from really having probably a lot more of a sense of what’s going on then the most people in Innisfil oh for sure you know I am looking at it and I’m Amazed by the accuracy of certain things in the sense that this was before the internet has access to your specialty Buddhist communities in this case but what I found particularly interesting is that I know I sent you this documentary called the on the steak and child and was created in 2008 and there was there was a lot of overlap in the sense because in The Golden Child we see this child but you know is said to be the sacred leader from you know prior life and the whole and I mean I don’t get too much into that part because we’ll see it anyways the beginning of the movie but this whole concept of finding this child because it’s important to their word to their community and there’s there’s so much historical in the bite behind that and I just found it amazing that they chose that seem to go along with in this movie I would love to know more about what inspired that this might be because there’s even like a you know we’ll see parts of the beginning where I’m just like yeah okay they they know what’s up they they have a pretty good understanding of the selection process wedding you know possible children who could be these leaders if they’re looking for so that’s pretty amazing and you know it at the same time this movie is also a testament to its time in the sense that it really is you know there are still a couple things that you know we wouldn’t I think this early due today would probably try to do better but I was still quite impressed by that and some of the relics what I saw in the shower I’m so yeah I’m really glad that you brought this phone to my attention bed awesome yeah it’s been accepted by I’ve been dreaming about for a long time cuz I somebody somebody besides me has got to enjoy this as much as I do and I feel like I haven’t found the found that tribe people that can see it from both both perspectives and you know the quick Point I’ve done a little bit of research into the origins of the just reading the Wikipedia and there’s also I’m going to digest the the the magic some notes on the Oliver Harper retrospective commentary where he did a review of the film and he brought up a lot of obscure film sack toys and things about it but but it is interesting to note that it was yeah it was originally intended to be a very serious kind of Adventure Thriller experience and then it’s I think somewhere relatively close to the last minute of getting close to production they just flipped the script Eddie Murphy came in and they decided to make it this way more tongue and cheek experience which totally works and it’s it’s just like so magical I just know when a movie has magic and when it just doesn’t and this just has it and it would not compute but it’s so after I think for westerners to have an entry point of the skepticism of anything mystical and then ething anything of that nature and so he gives you that sort of comic relief of how to approach this from as an American you know and American hero archetype to he’s like the wolf will go into it as we go along but but I will save us all feel free to to somewhat somewhat gracefully interrupt each other if there’s like an Uber we got to make a point about what’s going on cuz we can come in and get off them to the Weeds about about just exploring different aspects but if something comes up on the screen you don’t feel free to just like blurt it out and hopefully we won’t need deposit or back up or anything that could get confusing but I will just go along and and and do like the great says that the other commentators I really like that our form so so yeah without further Ado let’s see if we can kind of get a little bit synced up here so how about let’s try to get it to Missy we’re going at we’re at the point where it’s going to give the like Studio logo mountain range thing in like see see what happens like right after that way we can get pitch like the first title or something like that so so we’ll just let me try to keep it up after the Paramount sign or exactly what is like the first thing that happens right after and then we’ll start there so there’s a balance to the very very beginning of a so alright so we’re at the same point was just let it roll and then by all means tell us what we need to see you read between the lines I I certainly can’t a lot of stuff I wouldn’t pick up on so yeah translate what’s happening hey so it’s definitely taking place in a monastery them suspecting there intending a trailer to be into batter even the Paula because a lot of Tibetans did end up the fun facts or interesting fact rather there is a lot of Tibetan Monks in Nepal can you kill the audio on that sorry we’re going to just okay as you’re saying so much see her The Golden Child is actually a girl to I know that really yeah that is so cool because a lot of the times when we’re looking at actual Encounters of people looking for a previous leaders that usually layer usually looking for boys like I mean not explicitly stated but a lot of the children who have been found in these lineages are boys so that’s that’s pretty cool Russian Tea actually there is an ambiguity They Don’t Really emphasize whether the child has you know what whatever their gender is or non-gender so I think that maybe early makes this ahead of its time so she would give me information you have been sorry earthquake in Nepal a few years ago and they had in mythology that that there was a basically there was a goddess Temple that was spared and there was it a female child of devotion who was in that building and they kind of reaffirm their prophecy that that don’t don’t mess with the goddess Temple or you’ll get the rest you know is like a people were able to read into it what so we just saw some offerings be made and this is her actual Nala from a previous life and it’s really interesting how they did that cuz they gave them and they gave her those three to choose from and she knew which one was hers when she was knowing what that luggage was exactly having some sort of amnesia all right and then we’re going to see the power to restore life which is foreshadowing but we won’t spoil spoil it now she’s picking implements that there’s another process they think what they do they really cool before CGI really was a thing so they’re using real person just amazing to me so here goes the beginning of this raid and you never I guess if you knew more about the the the costuming that you might get some clues about where exactly they’re supposed to be from there or if they’re just like a ragtag band of goons working for the dark Lords of the Underworld did you have any sense of if they were representing some I mean like in Indiana Jones Temple of Doom they actually were explicit about that it was the thuggee cult that they were trying to represent what shall we say it in but there’s no real ID you seem like a good dark spiritual gangsters or something actually seen this sorrow costuming another Buddhist related media as well and I mean I see it I think of Siberian tribes but + communities but I’m very clearly there’s there’s obviously utility in having those typos wardrobe in cold areas right I just reminds me so much of a Game of Thrones character I was going to ask what what statue is behind can we see what statue is behind the child or is it just a question but I think you’re right like I was only imagine what they would have put me in tibetan Buddha but I honestly I can’t see it right now. Thing not to throw any any Asha monoculture under the bus but I know there is some extremely like Twisted Black time for coats out of there but it’s also the place that the word Shamanism comes from so it’s not all there is a lot of Tibetan black magic to there’s one Buddha who actually started off in tibetan black magic and his is a very long story will get into but eventually renounces it and goes on to the Buddhist no path and that’s basically his whole story this whole Jam so yeah there are there is there I mean in any for every lineage there’s always going to be you know a left pop right path dark path you know like there’s obviously always great Pops to right but yeah you’re going to get a variety of different paths with any any spiritual lineage really we we passed it a little bit but was there any significance to the cage are the reason why they needed to basically come like some from Destin yes I just like I would look like one of those Claws from Anarchy okay yeah I don’t know what to say about this what’s happening here it’s the pretty much exactly hey I’m all for the chunky asses I’m okay with this Ray why does he have to be ashamed of it he should be like seeing and dancing and worshipping the chunky asses as they walked by it’s so sad actually kind of seeing him just kind of being like okay I want to go now or you know so what we were referring to is this Montage that’s happening of American looks like l a Hollywood mostly and Eddie Murphy’s walking down the street putting up posters for a missing child who he’s he’s basically like somewhere in between I don’t think he actually is the cop maybe he’s an ex-cop but he’s like a private detective / Bounty Hunter / they caught ya like he puts Outpost reward for missing children so he’s some kind of like benevolent charitable Bounty Hunter kind of thing for lost children and they never really get into why that’s his thing but he’s definitely just plays the part very well as like a man on a mission and but he was at a newsstand and he finds a guy reading a porno magazine anybody makes fun of them in the car runs away and yeah he’s just reacting to everything going on and then we get to a point that I always I always drive to not be that guy but I know that I am so much like they make this I’m talking about right the host of the show who talks too much you are never liked that bad because that’s why I like doing your podcast like you know if you invite me I’m always grateful because I think you know if we always have good exchange mint got all three of us are here too because we’re not let you know I agree I think I mean you definitely let people finish what they’re saying then at least she let the message get across we can hold it for a sign you’re not the only the mic but this guy here I kind of like I kind of remember when there is like shows like this really everybody has 5 Seconds daytime kind of cable access that was the him being on a TV like daytime look like maybe cable access talk show talking about the missing child and giving you some background details and then it’s cutting to this gorgeous Tibetan scholar women who just is holding down her Shakti so hard and just stands out as a character that you would almost never see her stoicism but her sort of Mastery and self-mastery and discipline in her disgust with everything sloppy about the West is so spoken to wish I were a boy find interesting because this actress she’s actually Irish and Colombian and in herself I was like she’s doing really well with the part but I mean if it was today we have a lot of variety I feel it would be hit a little more home to the nationality I would think of all the record I think she did a great job with this everything you just said yes and I will say that that if I were to whatever part of my my time Trek Adventure in life has been has been asserted from the groove been carved by Eddie Murphy than this woman has appeared in my life in the form of three different people and you’re one of them but basically like her entire character has been like split into three of my real life movie characters so I give you I bow down to you for bringing bring a part of that that Juju and save us both for your wonderful Journeys thank you both for sharing through you know mediums like this thank you yes I did now we get into their she finds him she believes he’s the finder of the Sacred finder of lost children that the chosen one and he said Urban Dynamic with the kids playing basketball with and he thinks she’s crazy because she’s telling him he’s the chosen one he needs to go to bed to rescue a child thinks he’s smoking Scrolls or he thinks she’s smoking skulls and plays with her scroll that is like the prophecy and heroes it up like a joint and makes fun of her for having smoked it and says Topps rookie scrub yeah I don’t know maybe Hollywood at this time felt like Eddie Murphy was going to bring this to the you know the Blockbuster and it’s interesting you know the way Americans will bring up other cultures you know but also prioritize maybe things that we care about our culture it’s just interesting the cultural play but I guess they couldn’t be one story without the other apps maybe in the trees and maybe even to this day it doesn’t even happen where you know cultures are appreciated for what they are not made fun of you know and juxtaposition but yeah I seen this though happened in the 80s you know I wouldn’t have thought that there would be a movie like this at all I know it’s really a great movie that I ended up enjoying it a lot and I do think Eddie Murphy yeah I can imagine it without him it just it is so magical he just I think about the movies that that you can just feel it it’s a it’s a pass no pass on the magic test for for all films I thinking and this one it just Mi hours it’s kind of like a lost boys to say comedy and horror and vampire and she saw work but so this is now we’re going to see some fast and stuff so they are investigating this crime scene he was tipped off that these that there was a young woman he was looking for The Runaway teenager kind of got into the underworld is found having been used as a blood sacrifice to pollute to try to see the The Golden Child polluted blood and they’re in this occult looks like a squad of a scooter renting this kind of disheveled house and turned it into a Black Magic Ritual complex where they’re putting looks like Sanskrit spells in the walls and and very very creepy very very heavy vibes yeah it’s like black country graffiti it’s so funny because I mean you know even you know what the oatmeal hell this stuff will look at it and be like there’s something very visceral to me about it yeah I agree that’s it to me to the oatmeal really gross me I did look corny in a little bit and then you don’t want to explain a little bit later that it’s to put basically poison the child I thought it was specifically there has to be this writing has to surround the child and then they have to like ingest things and that’s how you diminish the prices vary it just seems like it came from probably inaccurate source of whatever this this tradition is or this yeah yeah I totally I know I was really sitting there thinking to myself well what where was the black what source material were they Consulting with because it is I think it’s creepy because I feel like there’s some accuracy you know to to what might have been written or passed down through oral lineages or you know something like that when it comes to black tan talking about somebody somebody with a real scholar that they must have consulted with in a probably a lot to interview them at some point someday if I would get to this podcast to the point where I have the ability to maybe not Joe Rogan status but a piece to the point where I can talk to people who has agents and things and a lot of these writers they’re pretty obscure it’s not like they’re going to be need to get to a million assistance to find them in all of these writers were just in The Hired Guns and Things so would love to get them on here but this is a great seeing where he’s really now having to Grapple with the occult and the skepticism of the otherworldly demonology that she’s bring to him very seriously so he’s just making sure that we’ve been through this deadpan but he has to just block everything that she’s saying and she has to just kind of like roll with the punches and hang in there did any of you like watch this and think of Donkey from Shrek sometimes like you need documents I look at it and think of his role as donkey and every movie okay so no she’s got him semi on board at least to make a few meetings visit some people to try to try to win him over that he’s the gold that he’s the the chosen one and the golden child must be rescued by hand The Chosen One according to scripture to help she wants to introduce him to some some folks some authentic folks who are going to help him get the picture and and so they’re going to this like a herbal store like a Medicine Shoppe and he’s going to meet this half dragon half human lady who was who’s very erotic and very very interesting absolutely said I love her but her story makes me a little sad though I do a little bit later I don’t want to I don’t want to lose the moment they have a quite a mix of different esoteric parts of different cultures so this is Chinese folklore there’s a combination happening here because there’s a lot of overlap right so with another guy you’re going to find them in South Asia so they can be especially in Nepal Tibet there is talk of them in China and also in Thailand and I believe in Bali as well we see variations of the lure of the Naga people which usually it’s interesting you’ll find good and bad right with naga in this case it sounds like the Naga they’re referring to our not-so-nice especially when we talked about the ancestry and how her lineage became part Naga because her was her grandmother that was raped by a dragon I think is part of the story so yeah so you know there are there is a lot of folklore about the not being good and then in Buddhism we do come across a lot of still some really interesting stuff weather connected to wisdom and wisdom bearing there’s a very well-known Naga Faker call Naga Kanya and she is an enlightened being who is a wizard bear but there is a lot of folklore just as equally about dog of people being you know the offense not behaving like a wisdom bear necessarily like they’re angry so they’re definitely walking through Chinatown right now so that was probably just within the range like you said if the overlap of different people mess up together representing all the different coaches there I think we missed a funny line where was looking at one of the preparations and he asked what it is and he says something you know he just died I’m not going to butcher that the word he says what he says good herb is good to keep the Yang up and he goes nothing wrong with my yang totally app for anyone who is doing erectile dysfunction herbal preparations for Tantra you know therapist and counselors you know this dick is Eddie Murphy dick joke about cheese in the middle movie so odd to me because there’s a lot of pain medicine that does deal with erectile dysfunction in a sexual performance talking about just this aspect of you know we can look at cultures up to a certain extent it after that they’re kind of their to me you know not comprehended but rather sometimes people just make fun of them I was just having a talk with somebody on this week this weekend about it about that but the sad fact is up to what extent do we the society allow cultures to really know provide what they have to offer you know especially religious practices so there’s a lot we still want to see happen with that right but I digress but I mean yes we we do have a long way to go I think still was true acceptance and understanding and curiosity I think that’s the major part all right so we’re catching up on a few things thank you yet for for sharing that and kitchen history he was he left that place and then he tried to invite her up to his place and it failed like it landed he landed on his ass with that it’s him and and she was very cold cold blooded when he asked again if she said no twice and then he pulled this act of trying to act like he was possessed by the spirits to tell her that you should go up there so it’s definitely like it’s sad because that’s like quintessentially what all of the country trucker earape artist guys do is like oh I am the spirit I’m the Divine Shiva and I’m channeling you know your instructions to there’s guys she will charge women thousands of dollars for their blowjob Enlightenment courses and so that’s like where that all starts but appreciate you know she’s like she’s really better boundaries we love to happen but it didn’t in the movie I was expecting that cuz I don’t know you know Ben we’ll get there we’ll definitely get there like the though they don’t be a I love to see that the XXX version but but that happens it happens in his dream though it’s funny he has that will get there but so now they’re there at this 441 some of these these black magic gun guys are basically they’re tuned in to what’s going on in there will do they have like a hideout now in La where they’ve taken a child to the US and now they’re doing this desecrated geometry later they could just hang out where they’ve set up multiple meditators who have this sort of triangulation of energy to basically block out his ability to astral project so he had he or she he or she that The Golden Child the golden kid is able to see and understand also telekinetic so meditating and praying to knock over that bullet blood being like that’s a nice look they got an expression yeah give me a break you’re not going to poison me I’m smarter than all you guys and waiting for one of them to fall asleep just stirring do all this the CIA black-ops MacGyver stuff and then also eating this sacred Leaf that’s nourishing and must based on some scriptures about how you could be meditating forever and only subsist off of like pot leaves and things so like the sunlight but are the the other and then a little bit of vegetation right just just to sustain oneself no one of the evil meditators fell asleep on the job and then like the CL is broken and now the opportunity to astral project and to commune with Eddie Murphy the chosen one is going to create this difficulty for him to to shake the mysticism off and so the the glowing orb emerges and he can see the what do you thinks is maybe a dream but he basically was stirred up to go and see this I think very good effects for the time for sure it’s a see you in the astral projection and I will tell you that there was a time when not to get too personal but I had the same exact experience of you appearing to me and the middle of the night as an apparition and within seconds I got a text message I got a message from you on Facebook and it was experience that’s so cool naturally you know that. Your sis. Power start to arrive to help stabilize that energy so it’s pretty much a magical thing is pretty amazing and so I have this part in my book about you know how to really heal yourself from what you thought maybe of you know how house Gary masculine energy might be some time I’m sure there are practices that really going to that and yeah that’s really a good part of my work you because oh man I mean we are in need of some major balance here on this planet and in this life in this world I so I really feel the more that we can Embrace anybody and I’m leaning to the feminine that is rising right now the more we can scan with that the more that we can make space for on the masculine to heal and balance and I want to say like rice but like because it has risen it in excess right but balance in such a way that it kind of comes down to meet the feminine so that this beautiful kind of dance can emerge in more Harmony and that would just make such a huge total impact and he just within the body the container of one individual body being able to fuse and merge those energies is so powerful yeah I’m really glad you what I do awesome guy and I can say from experience from the first couple of experiences and session work that I experienced with you then I really got I was able to feel the force you know that if we’re going to be using that Jedi archetype you know and in there if you want to call Kundalini Shakti goddess energy which is I love calling I love I love hearing of Kundalini as a salmon in force and you were the one who activated that for me and it was just very Seadrill yeah I remember like it was yesterday and so I appreciate it getting you you can get really philosophical and really theoretical but grounding everything into practices to make it as a workbook almost it sounds like this is amazing so you and it’s something that has to be felt in the body to really know what it is yeah it’s hard it’s hard to find words nothing will thank you for all that great work do you feel kind of complete as in that in this kind of brief introduction but but pretty I think it’s a pretty good overview I definitely thrilled to to go deeper with it and others will be as well so I wanted to give the bulk of this episode to this important news of promoting and getting the word out about the book and then but also address questions that I’ve had as a sort of I’ve become a sort of meta Godparent to a lot of different mothers who were rebranding as independent mothers who are in various stages of Court battles with baby daddies for custody and for child support and and I’ve just checking on this sort of I decided I’m not going to reproduce biologically all of my vasectomy but I will reproduce culturally by my being short playing that that more of a Shimano roll in peace and also keeping a little bit of distance from that that this is a an ancient sword of time tree thing of if you are not to be the guru per se but to be an Adept you may have to disengage from householding because there’s just so much mundane kind of learning and things you got to sit through so your country path is always going to be kind of a balancing act between how much of a household are you going to be and what roles are going to have within a community and then how far out you get to go on your own into your mystical practices so I have taken that past of offsetting my my familial obligations a bit so that I could study things from afar and then just go to be this force of will hopefully an Angelic sort of force supporting women who are in different degrees of Crisis that’s just a little bit of a of a context for why it’s important for me now to reconnect with you in a n n learn from you and share your teachings about Tantra parenting the pattern that has been emerging in the question is being asked of me and the view is is how does a woman who has just recently given birth and going through all these different chemical changes and hormonal changes how do you what’s the advice on keeping that spark of love and attraction alive with the baby daddy partner what are some some tricks and tips that you would recommend for for that really critical bonding you know six segments of Life first of all I’m not going to lie. I think the first thing to do is I mean really too kind of except that it’s not going to be the same but. It’s actually you know like I said with you know what having kids how you’re able to look at the things that really matter to you that was so when you actually are with your partner and you have those moments you know they might be less but we are going to be amazing because you are fully present and you’re showing up each moment you know and the end of a lot of for me it’s like when I first became a mom so I had my first son and it was really hard I was just like what cuz I was Dino stole so focused on your child and really wanted to be there to nurture that I and you are you know you’re you’re so deep into it into motherhood and it’s so new everything is so new and exciting and exhausting but I am in a few months I was just like oh my gosh like how how does this work how do we make this work and it was really really difficult very difficult but I found that by you know because I’ve had my kids almost 8 years now until I found that really what we eat sometimes you know if if we need to say like make an appointment with each other and that’s what we have to do if we have to put it on the calendar they okay these are the the two or the three days a week that were scheduling for ourselves for intimacy for connection then that’s we’re going to do that first there was a struggle because my husband’s like okay this isn’t sexy yo after he got over that initial thing it was like okay like we can do this we can make time for this we can we can be intentional about it for us really had to do that because not only was it you know hard navigating with kids now but also the work you know work in the balance of that it was just really tough so that was one of the things that we did the other thing that I want to say is that sometimes you know you you have good intentions but I got at the end of the day you’re exhausted and and then you just end up wanting to just sit there and whatever you want to do watch TV or you know just go to bed until I always like to say that really if you really want to keep that sparked going not to give up just because you feel like okay you know I don’t have that energy right now or I don’t have the time to put into this right now to really see and used Contra in a way that it’s really meant to be experienced right because Todd’s are really isn’t just all about sex right and having that fat set spark Tundra is it much deeper than that and so sometimes you have to tell yourself like okay even though we don’t have time to make love right now maybe maybe it’s just about lying down next to each other synchronizing out of breath making that I contact I’m falling asleep to that I’m letting that be enough you know before you know this night or this week or whatever it is like in the beginning it’s not to really put so much pressure on yourself but to use Simple practice is like you know that you have your own position and just sitting there together and being or maybe you know it’s one night you really need a massage right now you know I really just after having a long day or a long week and be with the kids so much that’s what I really need so communicating that to your partner and really staying in touch with that and not being embarrassed or not feeling like it’s too much or too much of a burden or whatever it is just really being clear about what you deeply need I’m in a lot of that comes down to really checking in you know with yourself all the time and seeing what’s there I really feel like things like that even though you know you might be cuz it’s also self-care right so you’re able to connect with your partner in that way and then you’re also able to have that time must be nurtured and a slowing down which is also key so I think everyone is going to work differently and it’s going to be unique for all of us but it’s really about finding those opportunities to stay consistent to really stay connected in those small tangible ways and mlc really accepting that it’s okay that you know your relationship has changed the amount of time might be able to have to devote to one another Soul has changed I’m not true but you can actually take all that and evolve it into something in a lot of cases that really goes much deeper than that you know because now it’s it’s amazing you know you have this this connection and you know going through motherhood and Emma strikes that that gives you time to actually be able to take that foundation and that strength and that those nurturing abilities and that expression being able to use that with your partner in your relationship I’m having that Foundation really can make me very powerful in a way that’s unexpected just as amazing as you always bring it back to the fundamentals of the practices this is not all hot air to talk about it tell about doing it doing the work and I just feel like it makes me think that I can think of I mean I know some couples will have the foresight to at least make prenuptial agreement but I can’t think of anyone who they actually said we are going to go through the most insane trans transformation of everything we know we can if its first time parents who have no clue what to expect and they and what if they were to get these to be the eye of a storm throughout anyting that’s the Abbey unless Ty gazing the synchronized breathing you can’t touch that space with anything so but but pure Bliss and whatever does need to get work through if it’s done in that space it’s going to be conscious it’s going to be a constructive and it’s going to be a firming so I feel like it’s the what I’m hearing you say and what diarrhea firm is two people listening if you were expecting and you want to keep this container of love together and ever strengthening then start doing his practices now and know that you’re going to really rely on them it’s going to be life-and-death okay we’re just going there so I can breed all right like can’t we just do that let’s just do that next week or let’s just all of that I mean once you start doing it and engaging and you feel that present in your body and the Net Connection you have to just trust that all of that and all of that adds up and all of that makes a difference in your relationship every moment of that that time that you have on to be able to connect in that way as powerful well thank you again for bringing it back to to those core practices again you could have a lot of compliments sure there’s a million complicated bits of advice that people could give for this but this is so practical and and I just I dare people could really do it in and I don’t think you can fail you know I don’t think it’s possible to fail if you have good intentions and you do the scratches so yeah so we were getting also to your kind of making a perfect segue to the next question which is more more about the the asymmetry of responsibility and Duty specially for breastfeeding mothers and mothers to be carried to full-term and whatnot it’s it’s like there’s such a the mail investment just as how I always make this joke there probably less violence in the world is men had to breastfeed but women actually held the babies in their room still so imagine that you wouldn’t be off to go into war and using weapons and guns and swords that she had breastfeeding on demand for whatever after 5 years income that would be great that leaves man with such an unfair and balance of freedom and privilege to not be bound to the those tasks so a lot of women are rightfully lamenting this sensitive of the men who are supposed to be there showing up to with the with the mother is hoping for is that yeah he’s going to go to work and put food on the table and make it so I don’t have to work hopefully or I can work you know in a way that I can still be involved in my children’s lives you know for God’s sake you know who something something not just not just the short maternity leave remind me that the CEO of YouTube is a yogini who is Hardcore advocate for way longer maternity leave or something yeah I didn’t know that I’ll send you a link to a video where it where you get to see that she’s actually really badass them she’s a fierce that ass woman who’s awake I have no idea how did you navigate and how do you recommend for women who maybe don’t have is as blessed of a of a beloved Fixer-Upper type type men how do you get them on board with really going the extra mile of of checking in about about the needs a mother you know mother would have if she is being assertive about her knees in about the new suicide where she would like how can you be humbled to her and just be asking and showing up to being serviced that’s a question that’s a really great question and I have to say that I’m really fortunate with Eric because he I mean he has just him and he is just been a tremendous support from the beginning but then at the same time it’s like I also have to do my part with him right of being very clear about I need you no because then it that this always with him you know in the beginning of special rub up against this when he just wouldn’t know you know and I would be just waiting silently expecting something but he wouldn’t really know that that was what exactly I was looking for right because for women it’s like having that ability to breastfeed and nurture and carry this baby. Room I mean just how we have those abilities so readily at hand and we know what we need sometimes it’s hard to say yeah I need this actually it sometimes it’s hard because where we can be so strong you know and we can put off the 15 so strong and like we have everything together and I know that I do that a lot of time where I’m just like yep I’m good I don’t need help I look what I’m doing all by myself I’m doing all these amazing but that really inside I’m like oh my gosh like what am I I can’t do all this by myself and just allowing your partner that opportunity like okay like this is really what I need and this is the support that I need and this is how I feel going through that and not being afraid to say I am overwhelmed right now you know and and can you please and saying this from a place of love right not from a place that judgment and like what are you doing for me and you know resenting that you know you have more freedom than me and Bubba blah and I’m here breastfeeding or whatever it is not doing it from that place but from you know from your center from a place of love like I’m I’m really overwhelmed I need help with this right now you know can you get up be up with a baby now for two hours because I only had 3 hours of sleep last night instead of just silently you know doing in that moment when you feel I mean I I just I know a lot of of moms and a lot of friends who dust will just be like okay well he didn’t you know my partner my spouse he didn’t step up and so I had to do it and then my will but did you say something and they’re like no or maybe they did say something but you know it wasn’t from that place you know of just clear intentional loving vulnerable until. I think that was one of the biggest things for me especially you know when our relationship I’m like okay and then you know my husband tries to tell me like he’s Eichler like he’s like really I want to be able to show up for you like I want to be strong for you I want you to feel good but he’s like I honestly don’t I just need to to hear it I just sometimes I need to be told or I need to be reminded because it doesn’t come as naturally to me and then show me be mindful of that and not you know not falling to being hurtful or resentful something makes me cute different do you know well that’s really really profound that that really gets to the hardest exactly what I’m seeing go wrong inside once at once that slippery slope really hard I mean it’s kids once this thing start to add up then breaking through that you’re really. It’s really snowballing and that’s your thing everything is this Noble thing I’ve seen it yet so that is great advice I think that work that I said the fly to something if x is kind of ridiculous that it reminds me of I remember seeing young young women and whatever middle school or high school and home home economics class and they will be given an assignment to have a baby doll with them for whatever and in that relationship it’s like okay honey we’re going to do what it’s going to feel like for me to be busy and need help from you and you put in your garden that would be funny if it decided to give people that sensitivity at sensitivity training cuz once it’s already ratchet up and then more expenses than what I’m seeing to notice let me know way more than I do but it’s like I don’t think I think people underestimate the cost of of multiple visits to the pediatrician a week you know it’s like figuring out food allergies and decoding the sugar all of the ways that sugar is is is surreptitiously inserted into packaged food and just it’s such a pill battle to be holistic and to be in at all so it’s just this this is all in on top of just I mean most people are just buying everything off the shelf from entertainment to toys to food to diapers and whatever it is it’s all just off the shelf but to have that effect of wanting to do better than the last Generations or to resist the marketing and be more green or whatever that’s a whole another layer of the building so you know it’s just to get more and more complicated and at the end of the day I see the women just getting ran ragged and the dudes just kind of blowing him off sadly to say but if we could he had say that actually kind of Segways a bit to another question which is and this I mean you could you could write a whole book just on this subject alone out so I don’t expect you to to go too far into it but maybe just some off the top of your head pointers and we can move along quick to know we’re getting close on time so so any suggestions for creative and educational and non-toxic toys just a few maybe went to one website or one store just don’t know anything I don’t know if I’d be the best person to ask about that because I not that they have a choice in general just because you know like all the plastic and everything I mean and we like literally their toys are like one corner of our house like a couple of containers and that’s it and they barely even play them to be honest with you I feel like the simpler the better you know I feel like I’m all about like art you know art projects you know the pain and the crayons and all the art supplies and things like that so that they can enhance their minds and use their hands that way and explore that way they’re into that but I found that you know the purchases that I made with toys throughout the years it’s like that use it and then they’re done and that’s like a big hunk of plastic sitting there are biodegradable and Wooden Spoons and then they’d be busy for 2 or 3 hours you know that they have gotten that I get them they’re like okay and then they open it and then they look at it for 10 minutes and then I end up you know it’s just a way so yes so we do more we like to do more stuff you know in nature I mean they like to play you know what they say they love gospel they love being outdoors they love Ari and they love puzzles and things like that so that’s why I hope that I hope and pray that we will all have abundant opportunities to being healthy natural environments and have plenty of more outdoor time the better cuz there’s some nature is like endless you know just being outside they’re like so fascinated by every little thing the backyard I don’t know it exactly how I like how did the people survived all of those many years ago without these big pieces of plastic and well that is exactly what I thought I hope to hear in and a very firm it if so this is another test of the last one here is probably the the most kind of universal so I don’t know if there is an answer to this question however I died would like to spend I would like to spend my golden years doing a lot more anthropological research on on foraging sigala Terry and societies before you spell hunter-gatherer societies who have basically none of the the neurotic issues that people in the modern world have and and I love to know I would like to believe that there is that there was a golden age of human Innocents where the terrible twos didn’t exist and then that we could decode that and figure out what is it more nurturing Less Talk toxins I mean is it just that there’s so much overstimulation and so many maybe you’re actually able to perceive carcinogens at that age and then you stopped being able to and that’s why I mean it could be anything less or I could just sent them know something very out of balance that’s just modern so I’m just wondering if you have if you were really idealistic about know I’m going to teach there going to be a master Yogi’s by the age of one so that the terrible twos happen though I already beat exam enough I don’t know why you if you were like I don’t know like tell me what that’s been like for you and then if you have advice for people who are in that approaching that Horizon will for me I really I really just try to go with the flow you know just so I’ll talk to style just like accepting every part of it I was just part of the the beautiful messy process of development and growth and exploration and sometimes I do know because otherwise then it’s just become so hard you know what I’m saying because you expect it is you’re going to have meltdowns right it’s not it’s not going to be easy is there at like going to be some very tough days especially in the beginning if it’s going to be hard you feel like what what am I what did I get myself into one of my hairdo evaporate the next moment you know you’re going to feel the most joy and Bliss and happiness that you ever felt like wow that’s amazing that I get to be a part of this process you know that I get to witness this human being growing and developing and it’s it’s just amazing so it’s really you know you know the whole ton truck idea of a flowing through those energy that accepting every moment no matter how chaotic and allowing those emotions and those feelings and those moments to move to you during this challenging time to witness in you know children and young children because it’s like they can like be so happy in one moment and literally within five seconds that can beat me on the floor it’s crazy right it’s like oh my gosh the wide array of emotions from moment to moment and not inhibit that till I I feel like you know it’s like wow for me initially seen that in the beginning and fidget with night was my first one and that you can just move so fluidly like this and just just like that and get so consumed by something else in another moment we just amazing to me so I think we can really take a lot of sign a lot of lessons and just being present at something to a Full Circle closed right now because what I am even before you started to reply that lesson for grown-ups really about about cycling through your full expression and not choking your body is response to a situation out and the full the full body response to a situation I was actually remember me on my phone while I remember a room full of adults it you and Eric’s condo and we were being instructed to behave like children having a tantrum so that we can feel good and actually know the nice that storm there’s like the sun and the blue sky and in the EXO baekhyun the funny faces and doing the monster dance and some just like well you’re probably realizing hits are the times of the exactly yeah it’s it’s pretty amazing to witness is there a word for like reverse parenting or something has got to be a word for the the the from children actually teaching adults what they’re forgetting and I didn’t mean well that’s really it’s a really heartwarming conversation and I feel like the people who are hearing this and who have experienced so much pain and distress that there is such a open source free to use to spend your own time studying it get this book read the book watch Roadies videos I certainly considered to be the highest resource that I like to share with folks because of the same reason they listen before adjusters I don’t feel like there is a knot a snake-oil aspect of what you’re selling and there’s not a sort of a shady ulterior motive saying a gender that I have to worry about and and I just can’t say that about that many people until I’m sure you know and I certainly feel for myself that you know I have I always want to be deferring is often as possible to sort of protect my Integrity to not be the what do they call it like the god cock Shaman is just a narcissistic people’s souls and that’s easy enough to it’s easier to take that route of that that black timeshare manipulate manipulate almost hard not to do it so I mean I’m making and I feel like we are making major effort cuz that’s the complete opposite of what you are and what you and body I mean from the very beginning so yeah no thank you I really feel like you are just I mean somebody who’s just really in there doing that you’re like doing the work you know and you like do it like with an open heart you’re just like in there and you’re talking to everybody and just creating this just really amazing platform. You should be really proud of well thank you again and again I have to say you helped start at all and one of my the first real social proof that I had was that was your gracious licensing of me to share some of the video work that we did together it’s been a blessing that go into detail but all that in that in that previous episode supposed to listen of that and I will say that we we were blessed and burden in this in this time of this episode to take to cover a good intro to the book and also to open this discussion about time to Parenting I definitely want to set the intention that in the future we will give more of a of a deep dive into your personal background and it sort of will let that be a cliffhanger to hear about your experiences early introduction of Tantra and just kind of the got your path of building that confidence and certainly the form give experience Syfy oh my God it all yeah we haven’t got into your filmography either still be there next time to say this for next time to talk about birth because yes I mean not as deep and my experience naturally delivering and doing it with Tantra as my Foundation is the only way that I said I survived it and actually enjoyed it. Arrington have the complete box set free thank you so much thank you so much for having me it was really great and most richest time in in a moment to to share this Basin and certainly yeah it’s it’s a got it just give you a big big bow down because this you were the one who helped me start this this whole journey I don’t know I don’t know who I’d be or where I’d be doing it if we didn’t have a Meeting of Minds you know so yeah I can’t believe I forgot to say this I mean you were seriously you were the first one who discovered my website you were the first one who reached out to me and one of the first that I’ve actually I will say the first that I taught that I didn’t know because I had started already like teaching but like you know friends and friends of friends but you were the first clean one like the first student I was like oh wow yeah that that walked in and like was the beginning of really that Journey so thank you I did not know that I did not realize that that that’s funny so funny I can’t believe I never told you that that’s very well so everybody just like get over your awkwardness and just represent just like bring your egg and no matter what things will come out you know it’ll all fall in place to get back to the Sam and yeah I give them my love and thank them for allowing you to to do the book and for all of the people who parted the sea so that you could get that book done and then provide provide that to us and so much more thank you I know it I just want to say thank you so much for Amy what you just what you spoke about earlier just blew me away how you been stepping up to support women and you know what your mother’s I mean you are really holding for me to space there and this is really something that you know I know that would indeed and you know a lot of them have been longing for so thank you so much for for being that person and for filling that role cuz it’s just amazing the work that you’ve been doing all these years I thank you you planning to see each other that they were they say that it’s the fruit doesn’t fall far from the tree at least in the sense of the guru to train me to be a womanizing pick up artist in the name of conscience so I guess that’s why we you know gravitated toward each other There Was You know. The little like energy so I think I don’t think you would have found that path that was not your will thank you so much again yeah so much so much good vibes and good times and we will be in touch soon and and best of luck with all of your your your book emotional adventurous okay great thank you so much fun. Country Park. Calm and cook on the Donate button to help support the show in addition to see me and improving the podcast your donations will help establish permaculture goddess Temple provide ketologic employment for single mothers Please Subscribe and share your favorite episodes if you have questions or comments feel free to leave a voicemail at 818-275-1593 or email band at Township Park. Com Thomas gay