In this episode I have the honor of speaking with Grace Diaz a high priestess of feminine spirituality and sexual healing, education and empowerment. She share’s her story of early shamanic initiation as a sexual healing priestess and her epic transcendence of eating disorders with tantric yoni breathing.
She graciously holds space for me to open up about my personal wounding with eating disorders and we compare notes on our efforts to refine and synthesize diverse healing modalities.
Please visit her website to access her services and learn more about her great offerings:
My passion of healing began at the age of ten, when my father, a Reiki Master of 20 years initiated me as a Reiki practitioner. At the age of 19, I moved to Medellin, Colombia to intensify my Reiki studies. On this 5 month sabbatical my father initiated me as a Reiki master and we began co-hosting biweekly Reiki retreats to promote spiritual growth for our community. Upon my return to the United States in 2010, I began teaching Reiki all over the east coast.
I was introduced to Tantra, sacred sexuality, in 2008, and began practicing it full-time to reclaim my Highest Self. During the fall of 2011, I became initiated into Shakti-Pakti Tantric Guru Yoga and started hosting Tantra workshops and retreats. Currently, I am pursuing my PhD in women’s sexual health in order to spread the wisdom of sexual healing.
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Tantra Punkyour guide to sexual Liberation healing and empowerment as a certified Tantra counselor and certified permaculture designer I’m here to help you grow spiritually sexually and ecologically my online and in-person counseling sessions and training programs are price to fit any budget I’m looking forward to helping you design and ever more Divine Life Path please send me an email to Ben at Tantra Punk. Com and our journey together will begin hello dear beloved’s welcome to Township Punk podcast episode number 62 I am interviewing Grace Diaz who has amazing insights and offerings in the world of Tantra and we’re going to emphasize on specifically the Journey of transcending eating disorders and how that relates to the work that that you’ve been doing and would love for you to just Begin by giving us a bit of background about your life story and then how you confronted and encountered these issues in what you have to offer and now it’s in terms of support for people on on their spiritual like that thank you God for having you in the show so complete with or to start during I guess the beginning you know I was I had many dreams when I was younger starting line the Egyptian I had a recurring dream that the time has nightmares and I was initiated actually during my dreams as a young girl into the sexuality you know you can call him Spirit guides or it was it was basically a Rapture asexual Rapture that I had during dreams was when I was younger all the way up until the age of 12 and so I told my mom about these dreams and she immediately freaked out you know she she thought I was getting raped in my dreams pretty much and that actually was what was happening to some extended it was a very physical experience that was completely real in the sense of how he feel kneel during The Waking Life and so that was my my initiation into Entre you no looking back on it now and just being totally coming by it and so I my mom you know she called at the time she called a pastor from the church they came and they literally blast my room with holy water and believe it or not I never had that and so since then I mean not even to spend I think I’ve always been a very sexual creature but especially since then my curiosity of sacred sexuality just magnified and I became curious about what happened to me and I wanted to really understand that more and I wanted you like you mentioned been transcend to the highest level that I experienced such a young age in terms of the eating disorder that actually happened around the same time I was around the age of 12 when I started charging and I started developing at a very young age females now I’m looking at a very young age about dispatch no real in my opinion it’s very real and so I was developing very very young and and I just was growing very quickly and it scared me and I started purging so I could stay and it became both bulimia and anorexia and an obsession with working out in Baxley all three of those it was a death sentence yeah I was pretty much killing myself and I was very nutritionally do you know week in that area and so no one knew about it when I was growing up I’m also going to be in descendants I am from my lineage and in our culture in the Latin culture women are very sexualized at a very young age you know and the gender Norms are the gender orientations gender types are much more binary and in our culture they’re much more established that you know that the men are very much showing the women are you take care of a men’s and and their healers you know that you know all the herbs that you know dinner in 5 minutes for 20 people you know they’re very established there’s home women if you will and so and so anyway so my mom and my grandmother and my family was also Mom even thought of course that from you when I was twelve I’m sure that that probably at the time help me to be more body conscious of myself which kind of let into my eating disorder and I have a member at at 9 my mom was waxing me like my arms and my sideburns my mustache and so again I was I was very specialized I was I was very and it was in good intentions and now it’s hot just how do you know how to stick my chest out my mom was in my aunt you know I remember like they were showing me like stick your chest out you know how we would walk you know by guys and things like that and so that is the Latin culture in the Latin culture is very sexual it’s very passionate and all of this contributed to my perception of my body and so I at 12:30 and 10 years into it every day I had an obsession with everything I eat to the extent it became so serious that I was even trying to breed a certain way it’s a calorie burn burn more calories and I mean it was ridiculous and you know just this horrible it was really like I think about eating disorders now as a mental disorder you know because you’re not thinking about anything that even your own self-interest but in Mystic station that is an allusion in that isn’t even really true When developing like I mentioned so quickly I think that the issue was at the time there was really no cultivation around how to manage that and how to handle that it was you know it was all about being asked to go being a sexy and sensual and erotic and everything like that but not really you know the part of thought and show and I came in to Tantra probably you know I don’t know maybe 17 18 years old when I started really learning about Tantra and I was reading a book called jewel in the Lotus still one of my favorite one of my favorites and yes I can be nuts at around 7 p.m. so when I read that I just was eating it all up I was just and I just loved it so much and it just I just felt so connected to everything that were saying you know I’m in my other interviews I talked about how I was also initiated a level 2 Reiki practitioner you know and then at 18 master and so all of this to my my journey and you really understanding sacred sexuality and just you know the whole genre of of energy transformation and Transcendence and so yeah I was I was just totally impasse line just you know like a sexual resonate so much about that because I feel like you are so blessed to have gotten a hold of that book at that age I’m curious how did that book into your life that book entered my life through one of my dear close to stir fry and Ariana and Ariana was also one of my initiator I’m going to just shot her out I just love her she’s one of my like sacred always be moving into her place I was moving out of my mom’s place I was moving into her place tonight and just externally Progressive and when she studying everything that she studied she had like a whole wall of books that were probably ever seen in my life and my Nest at home I was just so eager to learn more you know and like I mentioned my past experiences with my dreams and eating disorder and you are coming to town very hungry to learn more and I also had that background of Reiki you know I had that background of energy healing energy projection energy Consciousness all of this and I am still into it I still referencing you know even to this day and so I’m running about energy and yang energy and the masculine and feminine and it’s beautiful you know dualistic principle that ultimately leads into the Trinity you know that there’s really a middle to which is like the silence and so I just started really trying to identify who going back to Tasha and how I healed my eating disorder I later came into yummy breathing which is something I know I think everybody who know who’s familiar with me at work they know they probably have heard me speak about you and I can really go into that because that is I think it’s not just a cigarette addiction it could be in a relationship addiction could be any type of imbalance you know and so for me it was in my throat you know I really thinking about it and find site now because when a woman has four notches woman cuz I know men have to but when there’s an eating disorder it’s what it was but specifically with my throat chakra I know that I know that it was like one of the things that I noticed after healing my eating disorder until tonight and I’ll talk about like how I did that but I had a voice singing and I actually had a better voice after I was able to totally heal my eating disorder you know my throat chakra open you know and search on in a woman especially a balance in her sleep I learned that from a another beautiful woman who I follow on the internet her name is dr. Sara Gottfried absolutely love her she is like an orgasm do you know hormone like wise woman and you know along with many other wisdom says she has orgasm that’s how I found her called orgasmic Vitality something that you’ll find her that way if you put Sara Gottfried orgasmic boosted I can totally feel that and in terms of the serotonin healing your appetite you know it was I was able to kind of animal is the most tragic when it comes to an eating disorder is you become totally just connected to what your body is saying you know you don’t listen to intentionally avoids me to every opportunity you can to just neglect what your body is saying because you know you’re in your shed and you’re saying to yourself I know that I need to start my order to stay at this week you don’t want to lose weight and you feel hungry every single day and actually believe it or not that you have to have in order to have an eating disorder it like it’s something that is really tragic but I believe it or not it was actually something that help me I know that I’m not at all trying to promote him at all but, it in owning it as a growth experience that allows you to teach and heal others it’s like you’re reclaiming your big and it’s not in vain I totally get that yes absolutely absolutely and so yeah and so listen to the body is very low priority for anyone who has an eating disorder the way that I was able to heal my eating disorder using the contract with listening to my body that was chronically and fatally in that bulimia and anorexia and so I started Johnny breathing I learned during breeding from another beautiful Mentor Safari Sutra and he taught me only breathing and Yoni breathing is very simplest inhale grips for vaginal muscles from then it would be gripping there same PC muscles that a woman would that you hold your urine with us a muscle pain exhaling releasing the grits and this gives you hear he’s two hemispheres is you because you cannot avoid did the level of body Sensation that manifest from you do that I mean what’s this I called I used to do it all day long like literally I will get high off of it I would do you know and giving myself permission to actually have that experience in so doing that day after day after day and at that time I was also a relationship for the very first time in a while to and so I was able to kind of use the energy and I was able to have the most glorious orgasms you know. Where I was able to Experian stock and not that you know I still don’t experience it but at the time I had the luxury of time of literally dedicating the other day and night to this and so. It how I healed meeting before I’m in with time I noticed I didn’t even actually believe it or not but I didn’t notice I feel my eating disorder and so my boyfriend noticed it you know he said to me how are you doing with this like anyone who’s very deep inside you know cuz it’s really hit and it’s really something that you don’t want to talk about the same around it and their assessment you know when people find out that you do this it can be some of the most it can be hard to keep a shame that always for me it was some of the people shame that I could ever feel so it wasn’t something I really like talking about so I remember he asked me to lunch after I started yelling and I said you know why I can’t believe I haven’t noticed that I haven’t heard in like months probably in and I didn’t even notice I’m so that’s when I started paying more attention I started doing my Yoni breathing more and I noticed I could join the workshops that would do the webinars that we do the young a conference call that we do we really promote money for women it’s it’s a musical and again going back to eating disorder really pertaining to the throat chakra that moaning really stimulate the thyroid gland that’s in that third shotgun again for me personally I feel like that’s how I healed my eating disorder was really when you inhale grip XL release of the Brethren the contraction together that mon comes out during that Excel and so I mean that shaking up with that chakra to really just mantle a lot of the blockage that I had in my throat you know I wasn’t talking about I wasn’t speaking about it I had a lot of baggage in that area and through it’s simple I mean such a simple practice such a glorious practice such a powerful know any moment of the day and for me change my life it was I was able to not only kill my my bulimia which is something that women for some reason and I’m sure there’s other people while listening to this have had Eating Disorders I was always told it was something I couldn’t deal I was always told all the therapy I went to all of the meetings I would go to it was only something that they said you know what we’re going to help you cope with this but we’re letting you know right now that most people never heal a little and on top of that out of all of the mental disorders and again eating disorder is actually characterizes that an eating disorder is specifically anorexia is the most out of all the mental disorders like I still can’t believe that I’m just actually talking about this is just so I’m just feeling so much gratitude but yeah that that is how I was able to thank you so much for sharing that and and giving those practical tools and insights in that hope and inspiration if I if I’m a I’d like to share a little bit about why it’s so important to me in my life that you’re doing this work and see if you might resonate with some of the insights that I’ve found as I’ve been dealing with that end in approaching this this issue to kind of help just further the discourse in and give more more different perspectives in in lights on what’s actually happening in the mechanics of the process in what what I’ve seen you do is you’re actually bringing into energy work the time to work and reconciling that with the limitations of the clinical sort of the limits of the understanding of it which doesn’t have the esoteric wisdom involves right that’s kind of the problem so is that is that okay with you if I kind of give you a something to yeah my my my little brief narrative is that anorexia destroyed my my family and and I’d say it pretty much probably was one of the single factors in effectively ruining my life you know for many years in and I didn’t really discover that until recently when I was kind of guided through shamanic ceremonial psychedelics my ceremonial workers like that the fracture point was that my sister might my my single mother was busy trying to put food on the table and my eldest sister was basically effectively my surrogate mother who is who is raising me and she was I would say from an esoteric perspective just brutally attacked by transdimensional parasitic organisms that lodged in her chakra system and induced her into the anorexia so-called disorder and she wasted away and I didn’t know what was going on until she was institutionalized in a mental hospital in Westlake at the point of near-death and then she sort of got adopted out of the family from that hospital to go live with the Christian family we’re kind of she became a real hyper fundamentalist Christian out of it and it did save her life but it was definitely like alienating an extreme in a way that kind of made us drift apart but I really descended into hell from having lost her as my mother like I was completely like turned into just a monster of rage and in confusion and in sadness and then everything bad that happened in my life I really traces back to that so I feel like I have a bone to pick with this this issue and it’s been a journey to try to understand and I think you know what it is very a case very interesting that you had that earlier life experience of a sort of energy clearing Exorcism of your sleeping area and not actually having some real tangible effective like something was there and then it got escorted out and then the symptoms in the problems start dissipated very rapidly or instantaneously so there’s something that happened on a spiritual or invisible level and when so yeah when you I guess the spiritual Traditions shamanic and Christian and Catholic and other Traditions would say a bad Spirit has come to take your life force your Prime now you’re being parasitized in an attack spiritually and a procedure of extraction has to occur in order for your natural energy to flow properly and for you to have your full Vitality into be a whole person and so and I often hear this sort of denial of the entity of entities being involved in this process is like it’s not that something is lodged in your throat chakra is that something is eating your life force that has nested in the throat chakra and pranic healing which was adapted partially from Reiki has actually taking that leap of synthesizing esoteric Christian exorcism methodologies and different forms of Tantra and Chee Kong and what not to actually create a modality that says orgasm energy pumping like you’re saying this hydraulic pressurizing of air in breathing and pumping is actually pushing out like a plumber would clean out a clogged drain that has not only just inert blocked like it’s not like it’s Concrete in there it’s like a bunch of organic material that’s riding into King and attracting foul you know if organisms you know that could be called demon so hot so that’s that’s become my thesis for addressing this stuff in the work that I’m doing so I’m just curious now and I appreciate you letting me give that kind of visas but does any of that resonate with any of your training or any of what you want I was hesitant to call them demons but they were and I know that you are and I know that they were I saw that and they were just black vapor pretty much and they had eyes and they were everything demonic that you could describe and so as my very first stream all the way to my last it’s progressed and just seeing them more like just being able to visit visibly make out their features and so initially I didn’t actually see anything look like I was in the black void and I was just feeling like it was almost like I had no relatives like reception I I wish is experiencing something and it was happening to me and I have no way of understanding what it was when I had my last stream at the age of 12 I had three only three dreams may happen 1011 I’m sorry at 1 with 10 11 12 so that those are three dreams they haven’t won theater very strong and if I close my eyes I see the entire thing cuz it was so real and so yeah they they they were demonic beings but believe it or not been made that I have come to terms with that experience I will never felt traumatized I never felt taken I never felt a genuinely never actually felt any that I’m conscious of at least any negative feelings about it I was you die I was shown what sexual rape wives at a very young age I was shown the the the forcefulness of of sex at a very young age and I had like I said I just I felt initiated comes like thinking about it a decade after you know and really and having lots of conversations about it I I saw it as being initiated into the sex I mean in that and the connection that you made between some deposit some parasitic deposit in my throat I have never made the connection I’ve never thought about it in that way is that possible absolutely I’d have to really meditate on that some more it’s really give it more thought and to see how I feel and you know everything to this day you know I I I don’t I am I’m so cleaned of the of the eating disorder I’m so cleaned from it that it’s almost like I don’t even resume to like I don’t really I don’t want to say I don’t remember what it was like having eating disorder I don’t want to say that cuz I do I really remember it I hated when I used to do it I hate it I hate it purging I just I hated myself for doing it so much and I like I said you have to force yourself you don’t like doing it you don’t like vomiting over toilet bowl after every meal and being obsessed with how to do it and how to get away with it to be able to see and I mean it’s it’s it’s like you know it’s really it’s exhausting and energy absolutely. And so I feel so blessed to have come upon the Contra energy again not my first Awakening was a jewel in the Lotus but do you know I I am very grateful and I hope that this interview and everyone is listening to this and they haven’t even thought her know that there is absolutely awaits you absolutely. That’s the point of even talking about that either maybe a behavior that you’re choosing to act upon but it’s not who you are and I think the other important thing to really highlight is what’s your intention with even doing it you know from you it was being attractive to the opposite sex from you was being attractive it was that sexualization that which I am not trying to discourage I think that that there’s a way to be sexualized and that’s important there’s lots of different cultures that have different rituals for sexualizing jeans and and they put them together and they have a rite of passage and I think that’s important because it had its place but I I was I’m very grateful that it was the sexual energy that was able to clean me out like you said like a to use like like pushing drunk out of a tube and cleaning out that way and I actually believe or not that’s how I have above all the way down my crown I would see the immense Cyclone of energy of white light energy just entering my crown and keeping its way down to my Yoni and clenching it gripping it’s so tight and as I would exhale I would literally push everything out of me and that was how I was able to clean my tubes do you know Mona the vibration that that variability in the pitch that you know that you have to be comfortable doing well you know okay so I want if I can follow up on a few things here because I feel like the the the conspiracy of the pharmaceutical industrial complex to keep people in the belief system of disempowerment and that they’re hooked on drugs that affect their brain which is if you listen to anything that Grace is just said it’s not in your brain neurons if that’s an aftereffect that’s it the way you think about it is happening after you’ve already had this astral body you know the sex happening and whether we call it demons parasites bad spirits or or whatever we call it the fact is that this Anatomy the energy Anatomy is something that we can have agency over and we can do organic free 0 side effect exercises that are ancient proven techniques that were to purify and disinfect then I’ve been using the plumbing metaphor for a while now but has as I hear you talking about the moaning in the new pressurizing and pumping I feel like if you’ve ever what are you when you can when you can let’s say some tomato sauce or something or some vegetables your canning them you’re wanting to kill all of the bacteria inside of the jar in a pressure cooker and so if your throat had some you know parasitic entities that were hell-bent on making you painful and miserable and you pressure cook them and move them out with this energy work and this hydraulic pumping PC muscle pumping all that it’s like well that saved you a lot of money I have to say that this is the thing with all medical industry a lot of a lot of the people in this industry are learning how to heal people some of these individuals are really generally trying to ignore people we don’t know nothing no stuck in a certain regimen using no different medications and even I think I’m hoping for the day that I can stop using either because I’m sick and tired of taking so many of them are definitely in terms of the Duke Energy practice know there’s different energy practicing and Yoni breathing for me was one of them that that really saved my life and so I think that it could I think that it depends on becoming more conscious of how you direct the energy in your body I personally believe that being able to generate the energy in your body becoming conscious that you can generate energy in your body and how you generate it and what that energy looks like its color its frequency of vibration it’s emotion it’s smell even all of this you can actually contribute to the formation of about energy through your Consciousness and so how you direct it is also set number two and the intention for why you direct it is also part of this one so all of this can can be different practices it doesn’t have to be so many other touch with many of those women and it’s not always going to be earlier now he even call me in South America right now and you know just to bring it back home whatever energetic classes now whether it is Tantra or maybe you know it could be but you know that you can generate the energy necessary in order to transform the thing that people can run and how they directed and the intention behind that direction I think it’s also the power. No doubting you know I’ve done tantric healing work on women with eating disorders and been able to see the before and after effects of kind of kickstand jump-starting a person’s Energy System that has been depleted like your battery is really low and so the lower your battery gets the harder it is to get the upper hand on whatever is trying to bring you down and just Eat You Alive so you know this is for the people who are not as far along this path into maybe here in the stuff for the first time I I hope it really you know this is just hard melting and empowering you know one thing I want to say to In Praise of what you’re talking about is like the dimension of feeling free and and facilitated and accepted into having orgasmic vocalizations weather during sexual play with partner or Solo or just doing this energy work Hanna Park I mean you’re such a taboo around pleasure in the sound of pleasure and people think you were crazy or they think you were perverted or something but this is a big one of the biggest especially for him and for men’s ability to it to bring their full sacred masculine into the bedroom and access the feminine nectar’s they’ve got to be able to make these beautiful vocalizations and it’s like that dimension of Sonic repression that’s in every household in every public space you know that it’s like I want to get a a big school bus and take adult field trips out into the wild so everyone can go and just moan their guts out and might come back so I thank you for that for bringing that in Overlook that and and yet another another word that I would that I feel like it’s coming to me at as you’re speaking about this one that would I think helped you know Alexa to know how you feel about this I’ve heard it I’ve heard it mentioned before but it’s like a way to transcend the disconnect between Sexual Energy sexuality and The Healing Arts for people who think that you know massages should have genitals owns be totally off-limits otherwise it’s you know illegal and a violation of Ethics not stuff it’s like the word that I’ve heard use of the phrase that kind of bridges that those energies in a therapeutic way it’s just that simple concept of or energetic hygiene she know which kind of question is that will are you practicing energetic hygiene or you all funky you know I mean to you meeting in shark-infested water if your hole and your hygienic you’re not going to attract those whatever you want to call him since the unfriendly is that are going to opportunistically take advantage of a funky you know it absolutely essential for sure and go back to it or we should have eyes and kind of like to experience that again I was and I will keep on feeling great you know and then it was almost like it was almost like I I just felt like I arrive like I died I felt so strong and I felt so healthy and then after maybe like I said a couple years and after that 30 year of Jenny’s practice like literally day and night like pretty much like any breathing in a powerful way maybe a year later you know I took I noticed that I weekend in my tractor you know I noticed that when I came back to my practice I was weaker in it I couldn’t you know really inhale all the energy that I wanted and you know it’s my body I couldn’t you know really so I think my at my know my final note would be you know if you’re really going to do this be consistent with a chair because I’ve noticed in my own personal life that lifelong undergoing maintenance process for sure will well I did this is like the fastest 45 minutes of my life I think we’ve just been real quick but I’m you have so much more offers if you want to talk about your offerings and your websites and I’ll people can connect and start getting if you if anyone who wants me wants to learn more about you and you’re breaking the best way to do it is probably just go to YouTube and look up the Yoni breathing and you can put my name in which is Grace Grace and we can put my my organization’s name which is graceful empowerment and then you’ll find all of our breeding videos we probably have about least half of them are just dedicated to you we are website is graceful empowerment. Com we actually have a webinar that’s coming up for women and it’s learning to use the Yoni egg doing Yoni yoga yoga with Yoni breathing so we’re doing the try out of foxes that just go extraordinary well together they’re they’re like literally one Advanced we hold your hand through the entire month-long of exclusive videos that the last one is female ejaculation using a drilled Yoni egg which is vaginal weight that’s made of crystal ends in the shape of an egg start orgasming and one of the experiences that many women have is actually female ejaculation and so again yeah that’s the weather June 5th of this year 2016 Surly eleven are that we only do once a year could women all over the world and it comes with a free young age and a free leather pink journals and two books the one that I mentioned earlier orgasmic Enlightenment and the other one which is the young egg manual so that is coming up to volume graduated cuz I don’t want to go back after I’ve heard so many horror stories of you know Tantra Jacques with your caught with their hands in the cookie jar that need to be you know well kollywood you know cut those arm right off but it’s very easy stir needs to be at a Yelp for male country has to get caught with your hands in the cookie jar done with making a dating website for women who are like commenting and completely Hide Your Shadow and nobody you had a horrible experience with you can actually Warn and protect people they’ve had to create third party websites like don’t date these douchebag. Com from all these websites making their profile and say yeah there needs to be some brave souls that say I’m willing to to be scrutinized and I’m willing to have you know testimonials and I’m willing to check myself and have a Guardsman I will and I might I’ve talked to some country good goddess you know initiate or women who are so repulsed by what they’ve experienced with men that they just have almost lost faith but I have said I promise I’m going to get the funding to pay you to be the Advisory Board where you license man and they have to be inspected and they’re there were conditions have to be inspected and they needed no man should be doing this stuff alone for a lot of reasons so anyway and I’m going to definitely let you know and then we’ll have a big banquet mixer mingle we have and thank you so much this was definitely a very very fulfilling conversation about my my journey so I really appreciate this the space but thank you oh no no no thank you thank you thank you for listening to the touch of Time Podcast please go to www.drudgereport.com and cook on the Donate button to help support the show in addition to sustaining and improving the podcast your donations will help establish permaculture goddess Temple after bite ecological employment for single mothers Please Subscribe and share your favorite episodes if you have questions or comments feel free to leave a voicemail at 818-275-1593 or email event at Tantra Punk. Thomas Day