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Jason Tantra Blissful Profile

Seeking the Heart of Gay Tantra with Jason of Tantra4GayMen TPP289

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In this episode I’m joined again by the charming Jason Tantra, the co-founder of Tantra 4 Gay Men. He’s stepped up into a leadership role in holding sacred spaces world-wide and online for gay men to share in the glory of Tantra.

Please visit his website at:
https://www.tantra4gaymen.com/

About Jason:

Jason is the founder of Tantra4GayMen, and a pioneer of Tantra for gay and bisexual men in the UK. Trained as a counselor and as a spiritual medium, and after years of professionally working with male survivors of rape and abuse, Jason met Tantra in 2006. He immediately knew that his life purpose had become clear. Since 2008, with his husband Ingo, Jason has pursued his life as an exploration of sexual and spiritual liberation. He has done this by creating events and trainings that express this: Events where men who love men can let go, explore love, and find ways to freedom where sexuality meets spirituality.

Over 10.000 men having been through Tantra4GayMen’s work. Its two yearly Festivals are beautiful wonderlands where sex meets spirit, bringing together facilitators from the cutting edge of Tantra in a context where men can love men without holding back. Its Tantra Diploma offers a one-of-a-kind transformative experience for those who want to live Tantra as a path of personal development leading to total freedom. Currently, Tantra4GayMen is expanding these events into the USA, and Jason and Ingo are working towards their vision of a community of open, free, conscious and aware men that are happy and in love with the very world they live in and themselves.

My Non Verbatim Show Notes: 

JT: thank you for inviting me back

talking in preamble, how’s it going, not been great, 2.5 months, look what’s happened in last few days in your country, complete horror, the world for me just doesn’t feel like a happy place, talking june 2

TP: feel you on that, hard to highlight things, generally would have been positive, hopeful, tone of shadow around everything, do feel like this, anchor moment, wound keeps being exposed

tantra teachers, she talk about, start doing shadow work, wounds go deeper, generations, trauma, goes deeper and deeper

tantra/tantra4gay men, tool kit for these times

JT: gay/bi/queer men who love men, like other pockets of society, we know what isolation is, we get it, for me, never felt so isolated in childhood, early adult life, until found places I could be accepted, many years to fully evolve, understand realize I had choice about kind of person I wanted to be

this crisis happened, for me,

just panicked about men maybe living on their own, high proportion of our community live on their own, home, apartment, months, uk things starting to relax slighting, everybody still in lock down, no bodies going anywhere, world not happening as it used to be

in SF, about to do a weekend, rug got pulled out,

biggest fear, I didn’t want to hear that anybody in my community had harmed themselved because they didn’t know how to cope, first panick

performed a bit of a miracle

what I did, messaged, all my tantra teacher, and associated contacts and friends, not a time to talk about money, time to be in service, in the middle of march, created free special online program for all of community in the app

5200 members in app around globe, managed to get 40 teachers, over the 10-11 weeks free program, ran over 600-700 workshops, over 10000 participants, incredible numbers, need, incredible spaces

many different tantra teachers from around the globe, yoga classes, poetry, bedroom disco, quality of holding together through adversity

so many of my community, been affected in jobs, relationships, home, structures of lifestyle, wake up in morning, low level anxiety, teeth clentching

emotional state day to day roller coaster

free online program, migrated into subscription service, sparkly app costs a lot of money per year

giving away discounts, promo codes to make it accessible to everybody regardless of whether they can afford it

global collective community, don’t have to suffer on your own

even in times of incredible difficulty and hardship, don’t need to do it on your own

people want to love you, hold you, care about you

share with you through this experience

TP: beautiful amazing, redeeming, resilience of human spirit,

epicenter of the outbreak of politicizing the virus, can’t believe how much extra suffering and death being caused by virus being political football, fog of war

still see beauty of things like what you’re doing

diy spirit, deeply radical humanitarian, grass roots, deep bows to the architects of internet to give us ability to do this

applaud you, deep bows, foresight to build online community

infomercial promo walk through

JT: talk about before that, far more important than our sparky app

low day, low moments, stuck in my apartment in bristol, not interacting with anybody other than online, emotional roller coaster, beyond that, my belief in love

can even withstand what this pandemic, crisis, event though huge amounts of suffering, misery,

still believe in heart, strength and quietness in love, stronger than negativity, something about love

for me there was like how can we physically manifest that

role as human beings to be love in action

spiritual teachings, consciousness, matter, is our job as humans to find ways to be the truth of who we really are

in the ways that we are…with people and our selves

sometimes worry some spiritual practices very lovely, ethereal, inner, work needs to happen

but for me, truth is, how deployed, integrated, displayed, how they manage to catch behavior before they react

watch themselves watch what’s going on

bigger spirituality

often in my workshops and retreats, profound orgasmic experiences, literally feel like orgasm and universe, same thing, traveling through space and time, for me afterwards, the whole universe has fucked them or they fucked the whol universe

for me an experience, not the truth of what we’re really looking for

maybe had amazing love making session, 6 months ago, year ago, 5 years ago, experience becomes less embodied as time moves on

for me amazing experiences almost a biproduct of what tantra offers

ability to have profound amazing fuck experiences, but actually the truth of those, is how they were integrated into your life, moment to moment

energy, being, learning that your being is running the show, operating the show

for me, is the experience, is the truth of who we really are, actually one big orgasm, state of bliss trying to understand itself on this thing called planet earth

for me, bliss love, truth all kind of similar qualities of the same thing I’m pointing to

how we bring that down here on this thing called planet earth

climate change, 50-100 years left, real issues, people we put in power around the world

for me what tantra does, alchemizes, changes perspective, back to a truth you can’t forget, weekend of tantra, can’t go back, can’t undo experiences

humans, come a long way, quite a long way to go

TP: eco sexuality, eco spirituality, inherent in tantra, always love the way people express that, brad amberheart, poetic integration, exploring nature, planet, fabric of cosmos, deepest roots of tantric scriptures, attitudes people had to abundance of nature, abandonment of hierarchies of yoga and bramanism, ecological radicalism, tantra heyday, like berkeley 60s event, full circle to that

medibations visualizations seeing world leaders having a tantric dancer come and bewitch them, seduce them into shakti vortex, having them be an expression of that

electric jesus, jonathan talat philips, all these leaders, rulers, egomaniacal, one big giant snowballing bad mood, curse of dictators in permanent bad mood,

spiritual practices, moving, dancing,

tantra4gay men global synchronized disco

giving back, service, apply, deploy

if you’re doing tantra you’re probably producing net positive energy outflow, gives you extra budget to spend on charitable loving acts

JT: first part, something about, contraversial,

TP: tantraversial

JT: we end up believe what’s being presented in front of us is the truth, come to america often, friends, people, news channel on 24/7, caught up in story of what’s happening on tv screen, that is their reality, spiritual journey of tantra is being able to see what’s going on

and not necessarily needing to get involved with it, not saying we should ignore the worlds problems, understanding we have choice, choose who we want to be with things happening

gay men, generalizing, being a sexual being, didn’t know the word gay existed, knowing I was different wasn’t good news

at age of 18, if I could take a tablet to turn straight I would have done it

not welcomed news at age of 18

america, religion done a lot of damage to sexuality, expression

repressed, clamped down, never know, alternative way of being

celebrate

brad amberheart, good friend, love brad, such a poetic way, way of speaking,

the point I’m saying, for me, what I’m wanting to bring in tantra, vehicle for freedom, actually if you see an animal in the zoo, suddenly open up the gate, so conditioned, in box, perimeter, doesn’t know the gates open

same as humans, all conditions to live a certain life, believe certain things, don’t know there’s something beyond

don’t really understand human potential, have clues, but not fully understanding

for me, what I’m seeking to do in tantra is enable people who’ve had so much experience, intimacy, spirituality, multiple orgasms, becomes normal, being in a state of orgasm, becomes normal way of being, then look at the world

hold orgasmic energy, state of bliss, knowing, love, truth,

power in that, that no body can take away, no outside circumstances can ever move you from that place

is that the spiritual journey

know the truth of who we really are, beyond the experience being presented in front of us, then have choices how we want to interact, deal with problems, and things we need to deal with

TP: beautiful, promise of tantra I have learned, you can transmute pain, trauma, suffering, fuel for fire of pleasure, magic, prayers, blessings, creating ceremonies, reclaim, ritual, paganism,

talking about politics of the world we live in , curious, I’m not into politics, anarchist, idealistically, consensus, direct democracy

curious, have any ideas, notions about, leverage points of queer people, different political power, mission to initiate people with power, and to empower them with shakti, shaktipat, kundalini

possibility of everybody, leading from a place, smell a flower and have orgasm, continual compounding orgasm, lacking in political leadership

JT: my mission as if I can help men, that’s my audience, find the truth of who they are inside themselves, whatever their life is meant to be, can than manifest

if you know love, know your own process, I know when I’m reacting from fear, anger, a place of love, a place of conditioned value system, having developed that awareness, gives you choice, choice is freedom

poliitcal, structures that we have, not about choice, not about freedom

agree, many political structures, not interested in evolution of humans, different values, priorities people put above that

we are, I don’t know if we’re waking up to it

but look at history of human nature, levels of politicization, kept people living in certain boxes, frameworks

not okay to have opinion, think something different outside of system,

many countries around the world that have done that

I’m after personal liberation in side

know it so much, so powerful inside of you, what happens outside doesn’t touch you in the same way

a lot of men I work with, have many issues before can get to that

working through, in classroom as it were, men that are confused, lost, that are dissatisfied, men typically come to tantra because they’re unhappy with something, or know or believe there is something better

tantra deals with sexuality makes it an easier sell than a meditation weekend

TP: done a lot to lather up the orgasmic energy, lot of hope and positivity

to be fair to the path there a bit of shadow exploration I’d want to throw into this

something you said right now, how people find this path, really is small fraction

tantra teacher from south africa, put it well, if you’re on a crusade to try to enlighten everybody on the tantric path, I got news for you, basically its like, at any given time on earth, percentage of humans alive, spiritual seekers, very small, of that percentage the people who actually make it a few steps before turning back is even smaller

the people who do make it there, do their best to hide

build your temple on the highest mountain

other narrative, make it accessible, easier to at least get access to filtering and initiation

not be ripped off, raped, molested, abuse, financial abuse, fraud, spiritual industrial complex

cherish the work your doing

polishing gems

something came to mind, point of acknowledging beauty of these art forms

thread of tantric scholarship around notion that rama krisna, rebooted tantric kali worship, for a whole new wave of accepting of the dark goddess, sexuality, wildness, transgression of dark goddess energy of tantra, socially/culturally engineering to be more acceptable, orthodox households

scholars argue, he was a flamboyant gay man, devotees, I’m not the scholar, something for people to look into, interesting and deep study

when I’ve been exploring that rabbit hole, rama krishna cult of kali in tantra, one of the gurus of lineage, giving satsang, the people who show up at kali temple, usually there, in some form of despair, acute life event, or series of events, brings them to the feet of the dark goddess at kali temple, in shambles, at least there will be peace, there will be love

other traditions, sex negative, homophobic, have to deny parts of yourself to be loved, tantra temple bring whole self, baggage, sins, homosexuality, still get fully love, healed, peace

JT: one questions I’ve had, why do gay people exist, has nature fucked up and made it wrong, trans, gay women, all different permutations, humanity, labels, why do they exist

wonder, consciousness wants to know it’s truth in this density of matter, in every single permutation it can possibly muster up, no 2 humans ever the same

part of the exploration of truth is this planet, could be every single permutation of itself , so it can know truth at every level

love the fact that trans agenda has come up in last few years

everybody worthy of love, everybody is love

society needs to evolved, challenge ego, ideas, normal, okay, love does not discriminate

conflcts that go on for me, invitations go move into deeper stages of love,

america last 2 3 days, absolutely horrific, the way its been handled horrific, can’t feel love, compassion, apology

understandably people are pissed, really angry

feel whole situation needs to find resolution in love

politics, tricky ground, america has not answered a lot of social issues it has, people are pissed, angry, rightly so, they know there’s a truth beyond the structures of society

TP: on point, pretty moderate, things could be said more extreme, I’ve been on front lines of resistance, carrying a variety of different flags,

chills, people who’ve really hurt other people, seeking the heart of tantra

salvation for sinners, people who intentionally, sociopathic, harmful, narcissistic, if love is this vibration, give it a personality, hinduism, devis, deva, personalities, all pointing to ineffable vibration of love, om mantra, resonance, if you’re hurting people because you don’t know how to love or weren’t loved enough

tantric temple recalibrate love compass, do less harm, become a healer

JT: diana ross, chain reaction, we’ve seen that in different times in history, invitation right now, change more love to happen, other thing, always said in teachings, human beings don’t change from a place of comfort, always change from place of suffering, what’s motivation to change, if miserable, isn’t working, something isn’t right, questioning, what’s going on here

wonder whether misery is a good thing

original tantra, tantra I teach is neo-tantra, osho, his body of work, my teaching lineage, comes from work that he created, teaching for 15 years, evolved and developed methods/ideas

psychotherapy, large proportion in my work, want people to learn how to integrate, give words to experience so rest of body and being can integrate

original tantra, ingo, years of academic information, original tantra for me, born out of dissatisfaction, that said at the time that only people of a high class and men, were worthy enough to access spiritual teaching, and soul evolvement,

tantra, a spiritual journey could be accessible to everybody regardless of caste

spiritual journey available for everyone

original tantra, different rituals

often people think original tantra is the best, is the more authentic, more amazing, some of original rituals, vegetarian or vegan, hold a piece of meat for next 5 days, and see how we get on with that , as a meditation, don’t know about you but if I was going to sell a workshop with that as the primary ritual, don’t think I’d have many takers

talk about the tantra that I and other people offer is of its time, the tantra we’re teaching now is of its time, we need to learn who to be okay with sexuality, have relationships with our body, understand the truth about orgasm and bliss, deal with the crap that gets in the way of shame, judgments, guilt,

some methods about moving people through a spiritual journey of where we are in 2020

TP: totally agree with that, notion of intelligently consciously triggering yourself with transgression activities

aghori sadhu, eating from skulls, extreme deprivation, acts of rejection of orthodoxy

to your point on adapting that best intentions of transgressive stuff, bicuriosity, ritual container, what is it that’s holding you back from experiencing double love and excitement,

taking phobia, turning it loving ritual container, it your point, tantra as tool kit for adapting to repression of your time, mean something different to everybody of every different culture

difference between eating rotting flesh in graveyard, and piece of art that signifies, it, if it gets the job done, maybe you don’t have to do the life threatening things

Tantric Quest, book, description of his experience of encountering wild yogini, heart of transgressive, jedi training, she was his yoda, sexual initiatrix

are there gay tantra books for men that narrate that process of initiation, not necessarily with indian, gay man guru, that would be pretty stellar, book you give coming of age literature about tantra

JT: didn’t have that tradition in england, when we came of age, think it was a bottle of alcohol, the world needs a good gay tantra book, on my to do list, one day, when stopped manifesting and creating, moved on to the next stage, curious around how we pass knowledge on to each other, are books the right way of doing it

talking about that app, curating and talking about experience of tantra, practices, things you can do, a lot more accessible, absorb knowledge books v online

feel something should be recorded for the time purposes, kind of put together, the world does need a good gay tantra book, don’t think there is one, or haven’t seen one

TP: cliff hanger, just talking other day, did meet up called kundalini monologues, love idea of curating the online museum of gay tantra, website, database, ways for people to be searching content

JT: app, talk about spiritual things, have to go back and talk about business/organizational

TP: got 7 chakras to distribute that load,

JT: chakras could do with a vacation

app with developers 18 months, alternative to grindr, scruff, wanted to appeal offer, another way to do this thing called a gay life

different way than what’s being proported by different apps out there,

asked ingo, husband, co-founded/co-runs tantra4gaymen

went shopping, ingo, finance director, said I could spend some money, bought off the shelf app, 10s of thousands of dollars to run every year

for people curious about tantra, wanted to know more, also to me an online, loving, caring family, global

5200 men, mostly uk, usa, europe, astralia, south africa, click on members near me, find local tantra men, big news feed, free content, goes in dailiy, articles videos, questions, pictures, people we buy it from, shocked, our audience so involved, statistics off the scale

global tantric community of men, keeps us all together, profiles, messaging, members near me, topics, article, writing, recordings, could go on about all of that, all for free, easily downloadable in tantra for gay men app

TP: that’s so amazing, a lot of things are flashing for me, something niche, overexemplifies the technology platform

attention, marketing,

if gay men in the tech industry, IT, webdev, are they covering this app as a news item, free press/pr for fact that it’s breaking chart numbers, gotten people reaching out, wow I want to create a plug in

JT: could always do with more, gotta get the word, out, anybody’s listening has avenues for that to happen, I’m all ears

how do we finance, all functions features, free, want them to remain tree, launched academy, miracle, 40 teachers, premium subscription $25 a month, tantra love academy, inside app, 120 live workshops every month, collective of 40 teachers, each doing 2 or 3 workshops about everything

yoga, tantra,

really the best tantra spiritual teachers in our kind of community, offering workshops as part of academy each month

promo code, 1 month free subscription

TP: love and creativity from gay community, light years ahead, very impressed, super excited

bored and frustrated with apathy a lot of sectors in the straight world, more balanced, flowing, creative energy, queer communities, more invigorating, more fun, west hollywood more fun, follow the fun, get over it

JT: why do I do all of this, for me, it comes back to my belief in love, that is the ultimate truth,

vocation, dedication of my life, help men find that truth, or find their own truth inside themselves, thanks for having me

tantra4gaymen.com

download app

tantra4gay men app in google or apple store

Mike Antipathy Eco Punk Logo

Forest Love and Rugged Collectivism with Eco-Punk Mike Antipathy TPP269

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In this episode I’m joined by my old dear friend Mike Antipathy for a trip down memory lane back to the eco-punk squatted forests of the pacific northwest

Contact Mike at safetypunk (at) gmail (dot) com

Check out his Eco Punk Column here: http://slugandlettuce.net/columns/eco-punk

My Non Verbatim Show Notes:

Old punk house, portland, or

vegan straight edge, deep ecology

trying to get land as a base to reclaim a bunch of everything

apathy and privilege rant

let’s get together and wreck shit

important for people of extreme left to get a dose of real back woods americana, politics of the constitution, boot strapping businesses, rugged diy attitudes

activist scene run by kids with trust funds

working in the woods cutting down trees

12 of use living in the house

kids traveling to europe, squatting we were stuck just working

bio region, forest, politically, right before WTO, big movement in portand, really exciting, coming off days of early 90s, nazis street fighting

more of a working class artist warehouse, used to ride bikes over there

spurkraft

first permaculture workshop with sasha scatter from icarus project

right as gentrification starting to crack, alberta, warehouse, the maul venue

liberation collective, all ages venues, record stores, collectives, solidarity and comradery across movements

wasn’t infected by super negative elitist eugene vibe

lot of toxicity

pre 9/11 heyday, more breathing room

anarchist collective network, stitch together different activities

the nuge survivalist workshop

backwoods skills

ted nugent documentary, metal heads joke about old rock and metal

he’s a deep character, people love to hate him, proto romance with survivalism

scheduled a workshop, the nuge workshop

school trustafarian crust punks, teach how to each things in the wild

virtues growing up working class white, grow up with guns, fire, chopping wood, machetes, watching red dawn 10,000 times

earth first heyday

Antipathy zine

13 going to record stores, super into Iron Maiden, Twisted Sister, Ozzy Osborne

Dead Kennedys

got out of abuse church, DK album cover, In God We Trust ep

Got that, had that song moral majority, nazi punks fuck off

Black Flag wasted era

Bad Brains

English stuff, Crass, Flux of Pink Indians, Rudimentary Peni

NY hardcore, politics dodgey but man the music

trying to get all the bands and all the music you can get into your head

Icky’s Tea house, 13th and Washington, venues in Eugene

Resist and Exist and Asylum gathering, apocalyptic mad max, profane existence, pull quote, a cross between braveheart and lord of the flies

portland was always weird, oregon’s mountains, everything drains into the columbia, eugene, the willamette, drains to columbia, then the pacific, punks metal heads queers, riot girls, drifted down stream to portland

big enough you could have this punk scene where you never had to associate with anyone else

hang out, you and the hippies, logger kids the smoked weed, eugene still had that, punks all hung out with the hippies, ravers, underground hip hop scene, cross cultural stuff wasn’t happening in portland

eugene had been a very very lefty, warren creek, saving last stands of old growth, feel into that hook line and sinker when I was 18

what if we had punk politics rebellion, bodies between trees and chainsaws, music festival, outreach, literature, speakers, connect kids to something bigger

Chaos Days 95

horror stories of the carnage

flyers for chaos days, 19 we rolled in thick, sf, turned out to be a bust

food not bombs

coming back man what if we did chaos days

get arrested for smart shit, icky’s sunshine the patron saint of all things counter culture, big shout out

just put in on man, I’ll make space for you, put out flyers, ads in maximum rock in roll, profane existence, slug and lettuce, booking

all the sudden 3000 punks from all over the world flooding eugene, raising hell, robbing liquor stores

city council meeting to lift camping ban, running for mayor

resist and exist, the punk scene in the 90s, trauma kids, mental illness

guy got throat slit, someone run over by train, skinhead problem

mutual aid network to defend selves from skin heads

sf scum fucks

horrible gang rape, intense shit

shows shut down

bands show up out of own pockets

road bike around eugene, underneath bridge, dystopia played, fanatics, all kicked off

skin heads showed up, starting shit, gutter punks, scum fucks, got super violent

watching all these gutter punks smashing heads with smilies, pivotal movement

for most of the people who survived times, extreme environments, a lot of us were idealist about a utopian pacifist anarchist, had to be tactical for the shows to happen, how much more anarchy could you get or could you want, we got what we prayed for, we got what we asked for, we just didn’t know at the time that we had it

asylum, chaos punx, train hoppers, amoral gangs, rape and pillage, mauraders, vandals, parasitized, they could have made a movie, decline of western civilization, hollywood drunx period, hdp

punk scene in la now is so good, love it so much

stiff little fingers show all old white people

where are the punks, where are the kids, everyone’s on their phone, filming, no ones dancing

the legend, troll, leader of the drunk punx

strung out, sweet kids

asylum, earth first going through growing pains

punk rock more radical, queer, take earth first to something more radical, bigger better world view than a bunch of straight dudes drinking coors

there’s this old growth, one stand, massive beautiful powerful trees, climbing 12 foot thick doug firs, we should do something about this

music festival in general area

some old log deck clearing, bands playing, workshops, invite all these different things a big presence will be this environmental movement,

sacred land don’t bring alcohol

earth first, going through wanting to have focused gatherings on sacred land, alcohol is really toxic and poison for a lot of native people

found amazing log deck up

not too far from hot springs

bands played all this water, everything was set up, kids from hollywood showed up

scum fuck kids from seattle showed up, turned into a warzone

van of alcohol rolls up, all the pc kids face the trauma kids

one night of bands, political kids fend off gnarly drunk punk trauma kids

giant orgy guy, with pick axe, taxing people for whatever they had, barbarian style

became orgy of violence and debaucherous robbery, primitive weapons

regroup in the city

h2h, the system created them, the system has to deal with them

never wanting to involve authorities in our bubble of anarcho punk utopia, felt we should have might, means, reasoning, collectivized consensus judicial systems to get through anything

at a certain point, it’s over our heads

notion that we should feel bad that we can’t handle the situation, we didn’t create it, the system did

we had that moment

pulled it together, relocate to new location

security meetings, perimeters

good times, hot springs, jumping off train bridge, made out in spin the bottle

bought manowar kinds of metal lp

really important that the music happened

remember driving away from the log deck, bitchin reservoir, Neil brought the food not bombs, legend, big shout out, still living the life,

he’d invite you over to his house to stay, vegan

driving away

whole arizona punk scene, really friendly, really tough

most of those hollywood kids are dead

good training for us wasn’t it

that was fucking raw man

sometimes you think you know what you’re life story is hinged on, the pivot points, now I’m realizing

eugene wasn’t a cult of john zerzan, it was a cult of group think

in the forest my heart chakra began to develop

fabric of punks, earth firsters, fall creek

almost half my life in l.a. I’m only in la because of the follow up

gotta recruit the foot soldiers of the punk movement, either apathetic or hyper political and don’t know what to do except book shows, make donations

the idea of living in off grind, anarchist community of earth first based, that whole tribal community, an experience not a lot of the radical punks got to have, I was blessed to eventually get there

when I first went to fall creek, camped there on and off for months

had that feeling I’ve got to mobilize the punk movement

went on us tour, ended up landing me in la for about 20 years, did bring some people out there

that was the spirit, how do we get these places protected, sorting through some of the really toxic riff raff and get some real eco warriors out there

give ourselves a toast, home break apple cherry cider

raising glass, bringing punks to the front line of fall creek

Mike Antipathy, eco punk column, antipathy zine

fall creek was one of the most dysfunctional fucked up environmental movements of its time, almost entirely staffed by trauma kids, a bunch died, from the trauma the ghosts, the demons they couldn’t escape, you don’t get into this shit unless something has gone really really sideways in your development

its a really good thing that we’re able to transform whatever bad shit happened to us into a desire to make the world a better place, not all of us get out of it

barely made it out of that, big glasses raised to all those people who didn’t make it, they were important

tribute to fall creek, and all the other people we’ve lost

fanzine, like to rant about stuff

look back, fuck

crazy, can’t believe it came out of my mouth, last one came out after 2000

super helpful

slug and lettuce, free newspaper all across the world, seen in south east asia, street punk market, stacks of slug and lettuce, out of the goodness of her heart

asked to write a column

reunification of rural roots, having been raised on a farm

if you think you can do forestry better, get up and do it

followed old generation earth firsters, we’re doing it better

fell into working on logging sites, tree climber, got into that, through that getting bigger and bigger in terms of work I was doing

talk about howling wolves, salmon run coming up the stream

print magazines for the subcultural left, and punk movement

internet, just too much, doesn’t matter

if you were gonna write a zine you had to put art, creativity, research, cut and paste, go places, to produce a zine the effort that would have to be made, was a heart work, don’t want to take that away from people who have blogs on the internet, but something to be said

generation gap between my youth and the new generation

back in my day joke, it was like this, walk 10 miles in the snow to get to school, american men, masculinity, their disgust and disdain at the softness of the next generation and how easy it is, and how they take things for granted and how privileged they are, it’s weird to now get that wisdom

thoughts on current punk scene, millenial, how have the millenials, picked up the culture of punk, amdist all the social media, big data, rigged and engineered algorithms, shadow ban you

where are we at with punk

super into, super into the way the young people are right now

really intense shit happening in the 80s and 90s not really as intense anymore

portland, nazis at shows mid to late 90s, now there’s not

didn’t see faces get stomped on curb, didn’t see heroin

go to a lot of shows, kids are so nice, so conscientious to each other

have more money these days, europe go to big punk fests, things are looking up, punks are leading the way, not doing the vapid shit of the sexy selfies so much

still around the scene, nothing moves me as much as my time, tour in mexico 2003, where I most dedicated most pure hearted, fabric of intergenerational punks, what I had always dreamed up

so cal pride

so much hate on millenials, being spoiled rotten, good to know

hopefully there will be more mentors

brings us through most of the chapters where we had been running in the same circles

get into some politics and some survivalist prepper stuff, debriefing on current events

take radical experiences and politics, cover tattoos and do ballsy work within the system

from that spirit of rugged collectivism, permaculture

zombie apocalypse fantasies where your mind at

wild, go into stores, shelved emptied of dumbest shit

not real scarcity

all the shit is still there, but people are freaked

two weeks a month of groceries so we’re not exposing ourself or contributing to more people dying

this is not the apocalypse I’d imagined I thought it was gonna have a lot more smoke, cop cars, sirens

y2k sitting in our mountain compound, waiting for the glow of burning cities in rural oregon, we were fuckin ready, bunch of dried beans

shit turned out to be a fuckin bust

unsung heros, not a geek or hacker, have to study info security, trying to catch up on what I had not been clued into, steve gibson, security now podcast, people laugh about how y2k was a non event, but only because the engineers busted their ass to make it not be

trippy point, I hear all these whistle blowers talk about how they’ve bungled the pandemic response, which governments have fucked everything up

if you do the proper preventative measures and you’re successful at preventing the catastrophe from happening, people will want to cut your budgets and say you’re wrong because it never happened, the thing you were predicting that you’re urging people to prepare for, if you’re effective at preparing for it and preventing it, then it’s not a thing, and people have cognitive dissonance, so then they get soft

south korea and singapore, more experience with SARS, culture of wearing masks

don’t get trampled on the way to the fema truck

live in a mexican neighborhood, exactly the same, stores are stocked, most people work in fields, not a lot of disposable income to buy all the toilet paper from costco

keeping local

not the apocalypse I wanted, where we got to be warlords

tin foil hat segment

some people scary, depending on where you are on the political spectrum, unraveling of world economy, opportunism, could go on some extreme tin foil hat

tin foil hat adventure

I don’t have much tin foil anymore

just being vegetarian, shopping in bulk, already had the bags of rice, nothing is out of wack, ammo from dead dad

have a 10 year old now, trying to teach him to be a better non toxic man

could be carriers of a virus that’s pretty gnarly

court systems all shut down

completely suspend habeas corpus, no right to speedy trial, indefinitely post poned

poor, mentally ill, mostly brown and black, get rid of the constitution indefinitely, let people linger for low level offenses

system’s even worse than we ever thought it was

not opposed to abolishing prisons, what are thoughts on trying to lesson density of over crowded prison, letting them out early into what, what’s their severance package, where they gonna go

prop 47, all the sudden supposed to let all the drug possession felonies, made it all misdemeanors, lack of treatment

gabor mate, science, trauma, addiction

prosecutors and cops running on 1950s notions, anyone who touches drugs is evil

most people in justice system don’t have experience with drugs and trauma, they should let more prisoners out

prisons make us less safe, prison increasingly traumatized, I don’t know

this whole system was made by slave owners

positive note, decriminalize nature movement, spreading across the nation, decriminalized plant and fungi entheogens

some jurisidictions, diversion programs incorporate trauma healing with entheogens

don’t feel hopeful about it, california is fascist as fuck, last place that does anything healthy with that as a state

state banned gay marriage on purpose in 2008, california is so completely backwards

I don’t think it’s gonna happen

despite people kicking heroin with iboga

not gonna have access to that healing modality, federally still illegal

things are getting worse legally than they ever have been, with exception of immigration

the state is going to take excess in as many directions as they can, then have to be austere in enforcement in other things

numbers of police departments, knocked out because of sick or quarantine

foreshadowing for emergent properties of anarchy that were never imagined

even losing of parking restrictions

dimensions of freedom that are unenforceable

we’re blessed to have the internet as long as it lasts

getting more into traditional survivalist communications, ham radio, late bloomer on, trying to go through thought experiments, what will you never forgive yourself if you don’t have this prep dialed in, you take for granted, you’re be said you didn’t prioritize what that was, everyone has a different checklist

I’m feeling pressure on as general question that can apply to anybody

no easy to cover ass, cover assets, do proper estate planning, what if you can’t do updated last will because you can’t assemble the witness you need to sign the document, government is doing all kinds of digitization of procedures

officially time stamp my intention

whatever is left after paying minimal debt, executor of will, power of attorney they would take some percentage to pay themselves for the time to sort out what intellectual property I have and what potential revenue streams may be funneling into my estate, decided I want whatever is net gain of my estate, to actually be distributed among non profits, I have no heirs, that are individuals, would rather structure something where I can say, here’s a list of non profits, I would want it distributed equally among the, 3 I have in mind are the Red Brigade in lucknow india,sexual abuse and rape survivors banded together to make most bad ass indian version of a riot girl collective, teaching each other self defense and martial arts, self policing neighborhoods, most bad ass warrior kung fu clan, martial arts masters from all over the world have gone to volunteer to train them, and give them seminars, they’ve set up non profit donations, part should go to them, part to the Women’s Visionary Congress, and the Decriminalize nature movement, all these represent what has kept me alive, and allowed me to transcend my traumas, I don’t know if what I said would hold up in any legal proceeding, at least this will exist til the paper work can happen

now everyone has a reason to do the unthinkable, do the estate planning

spoke to mother, here’s my plan, let me know your plan, this is a bridge we have to think about crossing

5 wishes, template to know how you have to frame things like how you want to be buried, what ritual you want around that, so people can’t abuse you after you’re gone, protect your soul:

I want to put this out, time stamping this conversation:

I would like to be cremated, and buried while planting a fruit or nut tree so that I sign can be posted saying here lies ben lawson feel free to piss on his grave and nitrify this fruit tree and if you ever cut it down or let it die, I’m gonna come back and haunt your ass

if you can donate organs donate organs

freeze my brain so my bitcoin holding will be worth gazillions more by the time they thaw me out

been trying to catch up on many years lost on anarcho primitivism versus cryptoanarchism

hacker punks, manifestos of crypto anarchy in early 90s, legacy of hacker collectives, the talk of the wall street billionaires, government officials abandoning their posts to join the movement

this is the thing you could commiserate on, I never believed anything anarchist came up with would be competitive with incumbent systems

they actually built something that was competitive, was able to out compete

line malcolm x once said, make the old system obsolete, they era that we were in , the analogy of how astonishing it is they were able to make millionaires and billionaires out of this hacker implementation of cryptography, it’s like saying food not bombs was so loved and so competitive with mcdonalds, kfc, everyone started showing up and paying everyone at food not bombs, fnb became the cherished favorite food of all americans, you never would have thought that something out of the anarchist caldron of creativity, would actually do that, without brute force, without violence, with an elegant ninja tactic, actually out manuver the system, and give it a run for its money, literally, and that’s what’s happened, something I’ve tried to catch up on, not for everybody to learn all the nuts and bolts, gotta raise the glass to all the geeks and hackers that I’ve always fuckin respected, the ones that told me that I shoulda fuckin paid attention to this and I was too busy huggin trees, I coulda bought those timber sales

thing with environmental movement is that a lot of the stuff we got out of that wasn’t actually what we went in there for, it was all those other lessons, we saved precious few forests but we learned a lot more, that you would never have learned if you were sittin in a dark apartment writing code and buying bitcoin

something to be said about wild forests, skinny dippin in natural waters, and smellin your own body odor and smellin your own shit everyday, those are formative things, that make us better

couldn’t have said it better, love you brother

no small contribution you’ve made to my life

stay wild

always remember, every day when I wake up I remember that quote, whatever keeps the barrel out of your mouth, that’s the proper way to live

Subversion through Perversion with Manny Festation of Porno Plague TPP210

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Porno Plague Pic

About Porno Plague:

“Greetings, foolish masturbators. Please allow me to introduce you to; Porno Plague! I’ll be your host… Your Ghost Host, Mr. Manny Festation. I am the coordinator of this rag tag group of renegade smut enthusiasts. The title of owner and operator however, goes to our Lord, God, on high. Blessed be his name.

We are a group of 13 prophets (myself included) sent by the powers that be to reign down a smut epidemic the likes of which the world has never known! Each of us, representing a different region of the world and categorical taboo.”

#APlagueIsCumming

More about Manny:

I’m also a former Christian youth pastor, had a small but successful stint as a professional wrestler in the indie circuits. I studied religious philosophy and social psychology before dropping out to pursue my own path. I’ve help produce and direct several Renegade Disney projects and am an Occult enthusiast. Other than Porno Plague I am launching a myriad of other projects under my company name; “Obscaena co” which specializes in purposely obscene content. I’ve dubbed it, “social experimental entertainment”. (Porno Plague being a branch of this endeavor).

“Your cadaverous pallor betrays an aura of foreboding, almost as though you sense a disquieting metamorphosis.”

-The Ghost Host

AI Generated Transcription:
(Want to help with corrections? Please contact me to learn about rewards for your efforts!)

Tantra Punk your guide to sexual Liberation healing and empowerment as a certified Tantra counselor and certified permaculture designer I’m here to help you grow spiritually sexually and ecologically my online and in-person counseling sessions and training programs are price to fit any budget I’m looking forward to helping you design and ever more Divine Life Path please send me an email to Ben at Tantra Punk. Com and our journey together will begin hello dear beloved welcome to Township on podcast episode number 210 I’m being joined by manifestation and he is also known as the ghost host and is that main project we’re going to talk about today is poor no plague which I am a member of the XPS. Net professional community of people all throughout different sectors of the adult industry come together find work share resources share knowledge and insights and the great forum and had good luck just reaching out and in asking for folks to they like to come on my podcast and talk about the work they’re doing in the space I’m definitely like an independent DIY level producer performer and always interested in more networking opportunities so many is one of the folks who who stepped up and took a look at some of my work and some shirts and blinks and I was a really turned on by a lot of what I was seeing at the porno flick sites and also very interested in the edgy taboo religious and spirituality themes that were coming up and though we may we may represent the movie working on behalf of different different entities and duties but stay as far as I’m concerned I’m interested in the art and creativity and the expression also the sort of just non-traditional and more which is more DIY artistic expression and interested in in just different cultures in different ways of people coming out now in and making their own telling their own story through pornography is very interesting and very fascinating from anthropological syrup refectocil with all that said many thank you so much for reaching out and I’m excited to hear all about the work that you’re doing and what brought you up to this this point of taking this role is that the ghost host and thank you for the invitation really I was a great introduction and you’re good at this a manifestation I am the coordinator for the plague just to get started God came down from heaven and told me to go out into the world and find 12 prophets to rain down a smile like the likes of which the world has never known so that’s pretty much where we’re at we’re introducing profit by profit and non-profit represents a different region of the world and Tabu category of pornography that is very exciting and so then that that excites me about this is that a lot of the religious right backlash against also called smut Peddlers is it they they seem to think that the narrative that you just explained in very plain English is like the the secret conspiracy of all of the smut Peddlers out there and I really think that most smut Peddlers are not that sophisticated in their permission in their their operation and didn’t yet you stand out with this Mission as a very purposeful very formidable adversary to to their agenda so please let’s unpack all this like I’d love to get into the Gory details like what was this experience like of this with this Revelation and and tell us obviously about the the prophets in the taboos can you just throw to unpack all this and go down the the table of contents absolutely I can give you a little run-down Prophet by Prophet the first one comes from Nazca Peru what does Masada mean she represents South America and routine of corn on the second one I came across was Herod or he goes by the username meet the creeper and you represent your lawyer in your hidden cameras things of that nature we have I see we have a c k e r r r Asian Ali Jihad from the Middle East Bernie Lomax nice little throwback there he’s our vintage porn bus Blackmagic representing Africa course whole gang men that is so cool mean it with this / I’m getting is more of like a graffiti crew or like a hacker team or something like a crew of people probably in somewhere in the 20s 30s ish I would imagine but who are like at the peak of having so much passion to express themselves and to be really out there in the world and not not afraid of like the future consequences of who you know that the things as you get older you get more conservative you get more cheerful about Grand Vacations but at a certain stage do you know when I think weed collectives of younger folks coming together in the same like we’re going to fucking do our thing I die Digger this Ensemble the sensible thing so how did you go about finding all these folks I’m basically all your big internet websites to find a landform for amateur models meet the creeper comes from the infamous and and websites and the darknet has traveled around and I found all these guys and we all sort of agreed we had this unique perspective on porn especially with the age of the internet and don’t you know on the front page of corn and you see all the starter box inside the videos and he’s definitely a darker nature in human beings and it seems like the manicure World wants to sort of ignore its we want to exploit The Fetish culture II deeper level and actually I think the progressive conservative religious right forces have basically they’re reaping what they sowed right because now if they would have let people just be free and be themselves and not be afraid and ashamed of all the stuff and it wouldn’t things wouldn’t wouldn’t have to to be we have the way they are now which is like people have to really put their lives at risk to to experience pleasure they want to have with her it’s just kind of vanilla almost sexuality or more extreme BDSM whatnot so just give us sort of the elevator pitch or or even more if you’d like half of what they’re their back story is like I feel like we’re playing a video game is like Street Fighter and you get to little bio on you see like they’re you know where they’re from and you see that that’s a great way of putting a man especially that first that yet the court has been very depressed for a long time and it’s exploding everybody’s face which is why we use the hashtag of leg is coming actually what we do is sort of satirical in a way so we can work characters especially with the category that the rent in the reading the world to represent they sort of them backlash against their own culture for example of our first model of the Latin model tourism sodomy she comes from here in Peru South America near there’s a very Macho culture but behind the scenes there’s a a lot of transvestites were example I’m not sure what the politically correct term is anymore so she sort of going against let the Macho culture here and being the dominatrix or middle eastern model Ali Jihad she’s been an arranged marriage and she wears her her facial mask and sort of expressing strong she’s a lesbian and she can express yourself more freely and I’m that’s that’s really the jest of it is I’m work splitting the taboos for all these different cultures where these people live like a man that is so exciting so now I want to go I want to be able to go and see you like where would I cuz I I looked at a couple of the the tube sites and I’m just kind of surf the bit on the different the different videos but is there a place online where you have sort of like a perfect profile Pages for each one of these characters that’s a great question actually I’m right now we have four notes like that, which is being built up and yeah it’s it’s sort of anybody’s guess right now through the tube sites we don’t have an individual profile for every character right now but we’ve only really introduced our first two prophets Tortas and sodomy and meet the creeper through the tube sites of that you’re going to see the majority of their material right now and every month we’re going to be releasing a good bulk of the next Prophet character represents a different month of the year they all ironically have different zodiac sign things of that nature well actress is so cool man I just feel like this is this is going to be the next Comic-Con sensation because there’s like a cosplay element going on there’s there’s this so much is this it just feels like it it it it hits the spot in so many ways to be able to I am just realized I wish that I was I wish that this was part of of my my younger years and I guess I still I myself I still have like a a character Persona and what not but are you so are you imagining this is going to scale to a point where I mean you said the prophecy was for the pick up the commandments so to speak that you got was for 12 but you’ve do you expect that this will kind of spark of movement and people will want to join and want to fit in somehow to this Mondelez affair so I’m never anybody who’s not one of the main prophets in joining and as soon as they’re material or fan photos but yeah it’s definitely sparked an interest in a lot of people and in the coming months websites going to have a ton of material in content that we haven’t been able to Sean to do besides yet cool man well that’s exciting and it’s good to know that this is disgusted look forward to and in the sub Center development on how it how have you been getting attention in marketing is just been I’m like super curious how how the high be able to stand out I mean this is so unique I can see it it’s super compelling and I’m just curious of all of the strategies and Pathways now with the internet that you could you know that you could explore like what has been working well for you as first marketing promotion strategies right right a little bit and marketing has been pretty easy you know through tags and just being completely different people are interested whether they like it or not so I’m getting to where we’re at now we’ve been building audience through the tube sites before the actual main Hub websites open up and it’s been an easy man to Cakewalk building up her audience that way we definitely have a big punk rock element to it it’s been fun mended the comment section under videos are like YouTube everybody’s arguing about our philosophy and people are confused and keep some questioning I think that’s really keeps on coming back to you you know what else this reminds me of that is so near and dear to my curly you know very extremely fucking rebellious in earlier years was the band Gwar your did you ever get into them where you found of Gore I love war actually yes. Man I was watching some interviews on the Sally show just this morning before they embody that that I’m just remembering the lyrics and just this hilarity and discussed and satire and revulsion that they embody but it was also like so compelling and so I might think the first time I saw I was exposed to them was in that movie with Ethan Hawke called Mystery Date were they actually were at a club in the movie Theses you see that and now I think this is like the second coming so you guys should start a band 2 sped up like Punk background music almost like a noise like a handjob music video and and I love that and I love this idea of like just the spirit of DIY men porn now being something that we couldn’t really we certainly couldn’t publicize we could make it back in my you know de I guess you could say but now it’s like a you want to like make a statement you just get a camera get on a tube site and Bam like do your thing and throw some music on there so how does punk rock play into your personal life and is it part of the 1st fabric of the collected that you’re building one. oh yeah for sure man I’m a during my youth punk rock was a very inspirational and I saw the same in your videos talking about your background and growing up I’m punk rock’s been very important to me what are some of that what are some of the styles that you were gravitated towards in the in the punk movement back in the day man up Hed PE Randstad the transplants no bands like that big Marilyn Manson fan Blink-182 actually coincidence are prophets that were found throughout the internet like tortoise inside of me is actually meet the creeper by Rob Zombie Blackmagic Hed PE all the usernames actually I’m sync up to sort of 90s nu-metal punk rock band song then also I’m somewhere I’m somewhat scared to even invoked the name but it reminds me of the Juggalos in the Insane Clown Posse and like the the cultures that spin off of bands and the sort of the yeah man like it really is the glue of generations coming up together and getting into extreme music of whatever genres in I really appreciate the people who can appreciate appreciate the people who can appreciate multiple genres and be into the goth industrial Punk metal and you don’t have all of that be influences in and what not so yeah me hopefully you all will be those of you musically inclined will will start to produce tracks of your own to go with them is that something that anyone’s doing or you just talked about doing oh yeah we got to talk to her a couple bands I’m here locally in Peru and back in the states that we’re going to start getting music from and no make it more than just born doll some music videos with slower videos been equated to already right now this is what is this is what is also a very interesting layer of legal protection for us pornographers is that if there is political educational or artistic value I believe those are verbatim words that protect you from sanity laws you know then don’t quote me on it but but I’ve looked into some of this President and I know that like there’s certain things Scott blood you know there’s a list of there’s like a black list of of things that will definitely get easy obscenity prosecution happened but but a buffer I don’t know so much about exactly protect me from you no liability with those things would just in general like if you can prove that it’s has artistic value and instantly if there is a music video element and certainly there is a a message that’s coming out with with the the statements that you’re making is that the backlash against the repression of each culture I think this is a hugely I mean who for all we know they’ll be a you know Museum a traveling Museum Roadshow to like demonstrate to the world that says he’s beautiful acts of political art that you’re making I certainly feel that way about it and I know there are places you know around the within the sort of dungeon gsm network and in the even the sex positive sort of network where they would you know I would love to like see people organize a film screening like a film fest and have your videos be be like a whole night you know the phone says they’ll be great right actually obscenity laws of something that incorporate we try to walk that fine line does he know if the majority is offended then you’re in trouble that’s basically with the obscenity laws boil down to which is also why I like to call the social experiment to entertain so there is some kind of scientific value there or artistic for example in press that you knew that much about it then it’s it will get me what something is cool about what we’re both doing is like exploring these religious themes and that is usually what will get you the most backlash because people are so so neurotic about it and you know they just can’t it can’t enjoy you know even though the humorous or satirical aspect of it at all and there’s certainly people who don’t want to see anything interracial you know for fundamentalist reasons are simple you don’t want to see depictions of religious figures of course defamed and that I mean altimate sacrilege me weird then the territory of ultimate sack religion but I also feels like the Most Blessed place to be so I don’t know you go figure yeah yeah for sure man in the dangerous me about your work to I’m a big spiritual into it while I feel like I’m exploring more of those Fat Tire you take it very seriously I saw through your videos and I’m interested in that man at the beginning of this during the introduction you said that we might be coming from two different entities I was wondering if you could touch on that a little bit cuz I’m interested well well thank you I mean you’re turning your back on me a little bit I’ll try to I’ll keep it short so we can keep the focus on you and overall but but I do appreciate the conversation last back then and I’ll say that this is an interesting a very interesting juncture for what were you and I are talking about now because I would say we we live in a world where and a time where we Revenge either directly or indirectly like horribly victimized by the corrupt pedophile Empire of the Catholic church that owns more property than any other single entity on the planet in this basically mine fucked and spiritually abused everybody who’s been forced to speak English and Spanish for like centuries in that space of like spiritual violation in trauma it’s very difficult and I think the punk rock movement in an even Marxism and communism the there has been a major rebellion and backlash against all things religious all things spiritual and then and then we sort of Miss this this important more indigenous deeper element which is a Shamanism a shamanistic approach to having right relationship with the spirit world which contains parasitic entities synergistic enter the entities and sometimes neutral entities but you know having an appropriate and spiritually intelligent shamanic relationship with energies and entities that are unseen and then interacting you know socially and sexually with other human beings knowing that there’s this greater invisible landscape that’s that’s where you know the the science and mysticism really has value and end I would say like the lake will freeze apples not all demons are bad like if you just start there and so you know some of them can be trained to be your lapdogs some of them can be trained to be your assassin some of them can be trained to or contracted with and bargain to be bounty hunters or others all kinds of relationships that can be cultivated so that’s why I say it’s like you know we maybe we may be dabbling or playing with different different archetypes and energies in and you know I come I played a bunch of Death Metal I I used to carve myself up and paint pentagrams and six six six with my blood and you know that was me just sort of dabbling in the realm of Ozzy Osbourne Black Sabbath Slayer level consciousness of evil forces and then getting more into Shamanism understanding yeah you know that’s kind of a child’s play the really more sophisticated mean is going to understand the Continuum and the taxonomy of the spirit will a little more and then actually be more of a designer and not just kind of like be spoon-fed Satanism or something kind of kind of false in in fake so like I got that vibe from you on like I didn’t see this what you doing oh man this is like really cartoony want to be like poser Satanism something that I could see that there’s a deeper message in a deeper sophistication so so back back to you I guess what what how would you describe your the way you reconcile the dark and the light and you know the Divine and the hell is she there all bunch of assholes I agree and we will expose them those kind of people that sounds like the route you were going with sounds like you’ve been reading on a solemn in a little bit like the Lesser key in the ground wires you know some deeper reading material there be I know exactly where talk about those are Satanism and yeah we’re not about that mean we like cartoony and satire don’t get me wrong definitely smells better than anybody like you it’s not all that simple indeed and actually I should say to to clarify actually love the cartoon aesthetic I love anime I love graphic novels I think it’s by the best way to teach a more punk rock spirituality is through a more fun in approach in with art and so I’ve definitely made Might my logo is a cartoon as well so I should say I don’t want to put down the cartoon that’s not an insult it is it is you say like you know what what is what is the angle but I could just tell you no Tortas and sodomy there is a vibe that is being exuded where’s like I don’t think I’ve seen a happier person in my life Glee and pleasure total debaucherous Hedonism that is making this woman seemed so fucking thrilled and I think a lot of the Sexes negativity just comes down to jealousy that other people are having more fun than you are and so we’re proving to the world that did that there’s this is just more fun to be more open and more experimental Yeah man so what are some you have more kind of future plans things to do that are you rolling out today have also coming up on the horizon and we should Nova other than the corn world when do you plan on getting forming like a an LLC or Corporation or somehow in like starting to set up booths at the different porn conferences and actually having more of like a what’s your brand strategy overall or is it you’re going to keep him or kind of just DIY and oh yeah we’re definitely going to start a cult and set the world on fire there might be The Thrill Kill Kult now they say that another one people have so much fun playing with his stuff so yeah that my grandfather was a tour bus driver and he toured with the Lords of acid umbilical call back in the mid-nineties well well that explains a lot doesn’t it scare my grandfather was awesome. Manuel fucken table volume down and tipping hats to all of the the shoulders that we stand on the people who like really yes if you are there other other like industrial band influences that you like or got there in like that Nine Inch Nails all the way men there definitely awesome yeah yeah I hear you man and so have you thought about doing with say like a like a lot of a lot of strip clubs and dance clubs night clubs and stuff they will feature adult performers as feature dancers and they make tons of money doing that one if you thought about doing like a burlesque or like a cabaret show what kind of thing with if this getting some of these folks together in and actually kind of doing like a dance troupe or something very interesting I can play with that so that kind of gives you more like a I feel like this is what I’m seeing a lot of a lot of independent adult performer personalities do with their brands that don’t have like a the safe for work personas online and then a not-safe-for-work personas online and they will just wear a bunch of different hats and be like Jack’s and Jill’s of all trades in Renaissance men and women and just developed a huge you know YouTube type of following and also could be like having little teasers for pornhub or whatever and so yeah hopefully that you all can can scale up and just kind of like you said be a fucking play again infect every fucking stuff yeah for sure man and you said it best to I’m we have actually been doubling on YouTube on Wii with Channel called Trigger Happy I got to get you into Fun trouble well so is there a do you have it I would I would love to if each of you all had a Manifesto on your journey to the profile so that you know people could that’s kind of like how they did the Gwar thing right they said they had an origin story and they kind of had like they’re just rude and crude fucking coming days relatively new but yeah you definitely have the right idea everybody comes from a very unique background to wait to post this until you have the website up and running and then I can link to it and it can be a seamless experience and go and check it out that’s going to be awesome yeah yeah man I don’t think I’ll be longer than I’ll maybe Saturday we’ll have it all posted up on the website Cool all right, it’ll be on the main page Okay cool so tell us about your mysterious many what how did you evolve personally to get to to get to this point of fat that’s a hell of a story where do I start guess I was but I was bullied a lot in school and one thing led to another and I got into professional wrestling just to kind of stand up for myself and professional wrestling lead to getting into stomach work quite a bit and I was inspired a lot when I was a kid by like the Indiana Jones stunt show at Disney World and the crazy story of how it all came together but one thing led to another I got like a big following in the professional wrestling circuit and that’s what led me to want to start my own kind of parity quote and would that part of leg was born through the call aspect of it all like trying to build a following in that sell up the tube sites and all this girl into it so fucking cool man I miss something that just died just resonate with which is it everybody out there is in denial that they are trying to build the cult of personality around an idea that they have that they think is worthy of other people you know giving a time of day to and the the level of transparency that she have about like that I just thought it was Dirty parody cold and just be real enough to put words in your mouth but I really respect that and I really think we should just if we were more honest about the really you if you if you have a creative idea and your wealth with for one there’s a difference of two types of people almost in this world I think it’s like you have producers and consumers you know and if you’re not making a movie out of your life Urban going to be an extra in someone else’s life movie and that’ll be all she wrote you know so so you can stand up yeah you have your idea you birth your EBT you have your brainchild and your you create a monster and if you want people to participate in the in the cult of your band or the cult of your your graffiti art or the cold or whatever it is there’s no shame in that and the only shame is when everybody isn’t their own coat here you know the only shame as if you were you’re not also doing your own thing and rotating that the attention that power so I thought I’d like this ensemble cast that you created and you may be the founder but doesn’t sound like you’re the o’mighty overlord is going to be hypnotized and manipulate people of sounds like people have a lot of autonomy and it’s more of a saturated cold if you will Geico life worth writing about with right somebody else’s life story well that’s a good one yeah and then Jim Morrison said did you have a good world when you died Jim Morrison and get stuff and get stuff for me about if you don’t want to tell the story of how you expatriate it and is that appropriate to share or what was that you want to tell the story of cuz you’re no longer in that did you expatriate from the US or you can you tell that story of where you’re you got relocated oh yeah yeah yeah I can do that no problem I’m currently living down in arequipa Peru and I got married back in 2015 and sleep I was taking care of my grandparents to lay passed away and decided to just move here with my wife instead not a very interesting story okay so now it’s I’m frustrated because you’re there you get to observe is like so you’re deep cover operative Tortas and sodomy doing this very taboo and in in Latin America you don’t fuck around and break with the Catholic Church you know there’s serious fucking mobster mafia-style death squads all connected to that shit and I will be I will be scared shittless fbe rocking that boat yet you all are doing a very blessed me and I’m sending my prayers to you to have all the protection that you need but I’m just curious if you have a sense of operational security around you know the there being any kind of backlash that isn’t just you know what backlash from people who are like real extreme haters that they might want to you know that you might want to be Detroit wheel and consider a threat I’m just curious if you have like a if you guys are fucking training with weapons and your bad ass isn’t going to be able to fucking slice-and-dice anybody that steps in your path or what right you had to take that shit very seriously and no I wouldn’t say there’s any training or protection needed men we like the open about it we’re not really scared we like being in people’s faces so you want them to know standing there with bells on that’s cool you know I also it’s a notice something interesting doing a lot of webcamming myself is that there seems to be a huge underground industry of webcamming Studios all throughout Latin America because I would assume that I’m not to be classes store a racist but I would assume that just a car like the it not everybody is going to have a super-fast Wi-Fi you know in their home not everybody’s going to have that all of the equipment needed so there’s more of like a of a camping Studio industry that I see where it looks like there’s groups of friends and couples you know it won’t show up and and basically give the house they’re cut but then they will have their show and I’ll do the county show and they’re just more just more of a studio based business model than like a home-based business model that you have in quote-unquote more developed countries and I could be totally projecting I could be totally wrong Lion Inn in misinformed and in presumptions about that but if that is the case where that makes me very interested to explore and discover is like what I witnessed on these webcamming sites is literally these collectives and teams there is like one called the best friends team or something and I think they were competing against each other for the most tips in a session whatever witnessing this new team sport of young people expressing themselves sexually in figuring out the most beautiful and elegant yogic configurations of mutual pleasure and orgies and just watching them add more logs for the fire and is a we haven’t seen this on Earth for thousands of years and it’s all coming out because of the financial incentive of webcamming where people who are rich basically and developed country term so-called are able to shower money onto the impoverished young people and hopefully not minors that’s you know knock on wood that they’re doing appropriate age verification but is it but what’s happening is that there’s a financial incentive to break every fucking Christian taboo of homosexuality and I’m watching beautiful friends doing all kinds of freaky by sexual stuff with no shame whatsoever and they’re just laughing and smiling and carrying on like you’ve never seen anybody and four Americans are on antidepressants it’s because they’re not they’re not having team sport webcamming sessions with all the male and female and trans friends like these blessed souls in South America near you’re not wrong you’re actually very very correct somebody puts their house up basically and they have a good internet connection and computer Hino capable of me know doing the camping and dumb they they kind of just like ask around for like models and couples and they come over and they do their thing for a few hours and the next couple comes in and I’m letting something that happens a lot here in South America Peru is kind of a conservative country although it’s some getting a lot more open lately but I noticed the profiles from Colombia Argentina and Brazil but a lot of those are actually Venezuelans and I’m sure you’ve heard about the political problems and oppression there right now so a lot of them are coming from Venezuela and masking their eye peas and make it look like they’re from his other countries that helps a lot but you’re totally correct about them the house internet sharing with friends I would love to make a good net fix the Netflix documentary about this phenomenon cuz I was on that I will be on camming and I would just be in order to keep myself aroused you know I would just be like thumbing through other people camping at the same time and sometimes you even be looking at each other at the same time from across the world like like working working yourself into a frenzy just like looking in the first night I just I’m on there like they’re with their on my stream and I’m on there seem like we’re actually fucking like don’t even know but we’re like beating up to each other. It’s just it’s so interesting man it’s like so social diesel Viagra and bring it back to you and then for no plague is that have you thought about creating a dedicated stream where you have different models come on under that title or maybe they have their own James but they going to represent the brand and so there’s like a a sort of aggregate Network effect true prophets and play games on whenever you watch a video on the tube sites we have the promotional links and advertising and if applicable it’ll take you to that models a webcam channeling opiate ChatterBait or jam.for wherever they come from most of our models are webcam models cool man that now I’m going to eat that’s going to cost me a few a few hundred hours in my life catching up on what I’m missing out on this because this is and it’s so cool and so interesting and fun and I guess I get bored easily with the typical whatever porn whatever camming and so if there’s this sort of cult conspiracy cabal thing happening it’s growing in in kind of fun taking over and eventually you know could be some sort of a revolution and then that’s very exciting hell yeah it’s happening man for sure cool and well I would yeah I’d say I’m like this is now something I’m extremely thrilled about almost more than anything else I’m aware of going on I’m pretty pretty bored with a lot of the things that I’ve been involved in for a long time so it says it’s especially exciting as a as things continue to grow and develop feel free to hit me up and would love to have you back on or if you have other other prophets that would like to come on but it’s an open invitation or anyone else Affiliated I think this is really something I would like to to keep stay aware of into to help promote and certainly they had the spirit of punk and a spirit of Gwar you know I love to just go in there is the notion of poetic terrorism you know when you can take that to be artistic you can just take that it’s like we don’t you know the pain is mine oh you know what I realized if you if you heard the expression the pen is mightier than mightier than the sword what happens if you take the space out between 10 and is between pain and Ms I can see if you was at there’s a typo if it was a typo and you forgot to add the space between those two words how would that read the pen mightier than the sword but don’t take out is just take out the space between pain and is penis the penis muscle that’s my new motto that’s awesome in every book of the Bible to pee so like the first one is Genesis and exodus Gods coming then well yeah again let’s let’s follow up in the future and and I’m glad to be a vector of this this plague transmission and hopefully whoever is listening to this and your blood’s been boiling and you know your ear your hair is turning white and you’re just mortified that I would be so so loose in my my spiritual correctness well this is this is something for you too to meditate on deeply into really appreciate that this is the this is the The Reaping of what was selling by by the sex negativity so we’re going to we’re going to come at you and it’s going to be raw and fun no I had a blast man I think we have a lot in common and you just bringing me back to some of the The Glory Days of when I had even when I had more brass balls you know my balls are getting a little bit jaded a little bit tarnished to it over the years we could polish them off make shiny brass balls again I am here man cool man all right will any other things you want to share again once again give the websites and and then we’ll call the show oh yeah I know that about do it man I just want to say I really appreciate you inviting me on to spend fun talking to somebody who’s similar minded and that about do anything cool and so that’s porno play calm and all of your all of the other sites are just link from there so people should just start there and go down the rabbit hole that’ll work well I appreciate looking forward to the updates and we’ll be in touch soon and take care and have a good one Township Park. Calm and cook on the Donate button to help support the show in addition assassini and improving the podcast your donations will help establish permaculture goddess Temple after bite Tikka logical employment for single mothers Please Subscribe and share your favorite episodes if you have questions or comments feel free to leave a voicemail at 818-275-1593 or email been at Country Park. Com Thomas Day

 

Punks in Recovery with Craig Lewis TPP10

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tp-craig-lewisCraig Lewis is a Certified Peer Specialist living and working in Massachusetts. He has struggled immensely with mental health issues throughout his life; however he has successfully transformed this into a life of wellness. Craig is successfully working as part of an outreach team in Boston, Massachusetts. He also tours the country, speaking about his lived experience, sharing his struggles and triumphs to help others.

Craig has authored and published the Better Days – A Mental Health Recovery Workbook. Craig based the Better Days workbook on his personal life and recovery, and every page has been used successfully in peer group settings. A Better Days support group facilitation guide is currently being developed as are Spanish and French language versions of the Better Days workbook.

Craig also has edited and published You’re Crazy Volume One which compiles first-hand accounts of people from the punk rock scene who live with mental illness, addiction and trauma. A second volume of You’re Crazy is in the works.

Craig can be contacted at: betterdaysrecovery@gmail.com

Please take a look at Craig’s websites for more information about his books, projects and events.

 HTTP://WWW.BETTERDAYSRECOVERY.COM

HTTP://WWW.PUNKSINRECOVERY.COM

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Tantra Punk your guide to sexual Liberation healing and empowerment as a certified Tantra counselor and certified permaculture designer I’m here to help you grow spiritually sexually and ecologically my online and in-person counseling sessions and training programs are price to fit any budget I’m looking forward to helping you design and ever more Divine Life Path please send me an email to Ben at Tantra Punk. Com and our journey together will begin podcast episode number 10 I’m having a discussion with Craig Lewis who is very heavily involved in recovery from trauma addiction and other mental illnesses from punk rock perspective and he’s got a lot of great resources that he’s putting out and is really doing a lot of great work in the field so hope you enjoy the conversation and take care of Namaste welcome Craig to The Point podcast and meaning to connect for a while I’m really thrilled about the what you doing evolving in the punk rock movement and and mental health areas and if you want to introduce yourself what you working on your projects and give a little bit of background we’ll go from there my name is Craig Lewis and I live in Salem Massachusetts this is right outside of Boston Adam 41 years old I’ve been in and around the punk scene since 1988 when I was 14 as a young person my life was quite dysfunctional I didn’t really realize that at the time my parents really intent on having whatever issues we had in our family you know identified with me as being the issue on their parents went from Boston to talk to the doctor to try. has somebody agree with that I was I was meant to be unhealthy and ultimately I was put in the hospital and spent you know three plus years and Adolescent group homes in residential homes and hospitals and you know I got out of there really unprepared for the world and I spend time with me until my mid-30s really just very dysfunctional and and I know how unhealthy I was I was I was on vacations for many many years. Causing a reason why I was so sick and NetSpend spent so many years has Peyton laws assures and doing is Ian playing in bands and I was always chronically ill the entire time and not not not do to you my undoing I was I was I medication I now know I never should have been all that actually caused me to be unstable so it was it happened and I got some my mid-thirties and I really hate my life and I I’ve been working on it ever since so ask him and we haven’t played out yet or called rapid cycle and hopefully we’ll be recording and playing with the last couple months all the songs about recovery and wellness and fighting the good fight and I’m trying to be the change in the world that I had to desperately need for myself and that I feel is necessary to make the world a better place especially for my people who are people who really are marginalized to this will have identified personally at the margin life person and people will buy both of the struggles and I really getting a nice Matt so I feel myself very dedicated and committed to doing what I can to make the world a better place in that regard over the years I’ve become Michelle theer I went to school I became a peer counselor of a certified peer specialist which is the actual title that I have and I got a call to the green Human Services and associates degree and I’ve been feeling different jobs and I’ve been the same job now for almost 4 and 1/2 years in a couple months where I am working up here call Claire team helping other people with live experience with benzos drug addiction trauma learn to cope with their struggle so they can have a happier and healthier and more satisfying life and as I continued my attention toward improving the quality of my life and making more healthy and and really more informed choices about what’s right for me in what I need to be near happy healthy and and well and it’s a side of my life I realize that there was really in the punxsy in the country has been going on since I was 14 when I first got involved even dictionary, and really any issue you can imagine it’s really foggy that I was involved in all sorts of conflict and problems and I was really out of control and I realize now that I wish I had some understanding and empathy and where I was guided toward you know getting help that would be effective in and beneficial to me and so I would suffer last and have less conflict and ultimately I didn’t really get that and I was really nervous or to be dysfunctional Duty garage if you know poor living standards living in squalor you know how many years as I’ve been that was almost acceptable yet for me it was just contributing to my my chronic mental health El Hardcore Pawn Canoga Park whatever I don’t really care about the labels very much but it’s a lot of it but still had history and never at maybe I wanted to provide a forum for people to talk about their experiences so that they could really going to be understood be heard yelling and be treated with no epithelium and and patience and really and you know you have so many of us end up kicking around lives and so many of us end up self-medicating or guide used for a very long time and we lose lots of good people to you know suicide in overdose and and Reckless Reckless Reckless living that results in an acid issue that’s not it’s not been addressed and I feel like it must be talked about and I really I just came up with the idea to do the plug and go with a transient idea at first and now it’s a book and now I’m working on the second volume in the car for contributions is out now do I speak around the Country Inn & in Canada and hopefully I’ll be able to travel around the world speaking about my experiences and and if that’s off recovery and dealing with trauma and all of the important stuff to me in and they’ll probably be rain have going on as be better days a mental health recovery workbook which is something that I came up with a Spotify and internship when I went to school for to become a peer counselor and it was basically a support group curriculum that I have people responded to and people benefited from what I was going to bring him to the the group each week and they have really no training and I doing that kind of work I I seem to be a natural and as it as it worked out after usually given a group in different places United jobs in as of altering as an intern to try to put together and took book form so with the help of some. I get the book put into book form and now people are ordering and Beyond in the UK and Ireland in Canada and Australia can I see my life was worth the life of struggling and lack of opportunity that I really just not to come into my anger and I got a question is it it does exist within me and I really committed to doing my part to I don’t let myself up out of poverty in and lack of opportunity in and financial struggle but to also know my people my people are people who have been marginalized in whatever way they treated poems about society and and and denied it a Crime Stoppers in these are just treat dignity respect and I want to help those people make sure they send their struggles are there any cooking skills so that they can look happier healthier and more satisfying lives and it’s my life it’s what I do 24/7 whether I’m at work or not that is how I live my life and I try to have all my interactions you know the it potentially real vehicles for the moment sore I respectfully dignified and communication because I know how personally damaging to be treated like you’re not worth you know if I owe someone else and you’re not you know where the inside of respectful treatment stuff that’s really my life that’s what I do and you know punk rock and metal all of this stuff really comes together it as being the core of who I am and and and what I’m trying to achieve in this world to myself and also my community in the world in general and that’s my Direction that’s my drive and I’m going full steam ahead so I know they have it I left his hat thank you so much! I cry so beautiful and and I can relate to a lot of different aspects it makes me think I mean I went through the cool cycle running away I ran away when I was 12 and then I was in and out of institutions in became a ward of the court and bounced around to different homes in placements and whatnot and for a few years and yeah just long stretches in different places and would generally end up continuing to run away until they got me they got me locked down hard for about a year-and-a-half at one point and and I really got the gas before it LOL several times I was forced on medication and I luckily I was able to convince them that it was not helping me and I didn’t continue to force it down my throat but yeah absolutely being a victim not only has to societal like Mental Health crisis that produces the different types of problems people have but also be true caged in with with with other Pino’s like extremely extremely mentally disordered traumatized other other people other kids you know and then I was actually just I was not clinically myself anything other than just mildly depressed as a result of being stuffy nose like I didn’t I didn’t have any extreme conditions just at the time they they just wants everything everything if you’re a juvenile and you’re running away and you you have drug problems you’re just sort of put into the same funnel institutions as minors with severe behavior problems and stuff so I got to really yeah I have a unique insight into the policy and institutions in and all of the all that sort of stuff and I did a lot of work books and I was put to the 12-step program went to 90 meetings in 90 days in head sponsors in yeah was put through many many hours of of different types of as therapeutic modalities and most of them were pretty most of them has he was very critical is too interesting to be like an anarchists and a punk hypercritical nnn aware and being forced to say you’re never going to see the light of day again unless you completely can form the ultimate Conformity this isn’t just what your parents think you should do if you have parents which I pretty much didn’t miss my father abandon me and has there been in the family when I was three and my mother was pretty much so busy putting food on the table that she was so emotionally unavailable it was rough going through all that in the end going from a totally unstructured environment where there is no Authority and then getting into punk rock and going on the street and finding family and tribe and being really initiated into a tribal subculture and then unfortunately being dominated by severe addiction and violence and alcoholism and stuff like you’re saying it doesn’t it’s riddled with with pathology even though it’s our best hope in a lot of ways though it’s really important to be helping it evolve and grow to be more supportive than have more resources in interesting me it was people like you that had probably the most affect an impact on me when I was going in and out of Institutions that because they’re always seem to be like at least one post-punk angel that would be that would gravitate to they see my boots and my Mohawk and stuff and then they would they would kind of give me the secret knowledge that they said they were punks you know that had gone to school to get a social work degree and so they were working in these institutions to kind of get there a minimum hour requirements for certifications and stuff so they would always smuggle me in Punk record send zeins I say most of my in my most quality education and in in the punk rock movement was the CCM Elders that would that were working in these places that was secretly be able to pay myself have you found other like have you kind of built build some good networking done some good networking with other professional Punk oriented social workers and clinical psychologists in I’m not a social worker or counselor but I have gotten some great networking and I do know a fairly decent amount of social workers and I also know if punk rock to your counselor and also just threw out my travels and you know the website to track a lot of interesting people and the call for contributions for the book them doing brings in a lot of interesting people as well and you know my professional mental health workbook by many people in the severely jitomate you know you got this was one of us and that’s really a lot of people that they needed to show respect of us are considered mentally unhealthy cuz we’re inside sorry. Or because we are unique we have our own style of dress or own way we were here and so many people in the system especially going back to the past several decades now remember 25 raising their face so a lot of people are treated badly because they listen to Scott and they had their own beliefs that said a child that won’t inform them you know just simply telling you this information doesn’t make it true as punk rockers and people with with strongly develops a personal item has a run but how do we get out of society where people could be respected and treated with dignity that many people are just considered mentally unhealthy because they have is s r e l a lot of people do that and you said it talk about the vehicle cheats for their other the color of a year how they know that really pushes people the way so I’m sure if you have an experience that person you know what I’m talking about and medic medic see this is a chronic courses offered at 3 to do this kind of work and dye made from and being accessible on Facebook through anybody who wants to chat or talk if I have time and show me people who want to make the world a better place and you want to get back to have this this like this deeply rooted desire at your house from Concord to they got at the punk rock yes of course cuz I lied to her right difficult and Andy were looking for a place to be who he always loved being judged 11 also really have this desire in this need to help make the world a better price and summer squash down by Society in the system and and that it’s really hard to really good blossom into the person that you suggest Lee want needs to be and it’s not going to come across people like that all the time who really didn’t know that I could get better but you didn’t know that these kind of jobs exist and if you can get trained to do this kind of work is it absolutely amazing relationship and what I’m doing and yeah that that that in some ways that makes you sad that people have struggled so much just like I had struggled so much and I never been offered that information and then once I got even the tiniest bit of information that was possible I took that ball and Iran Iran Iran I’m still running and life getting better certainly You know what last step of this is that odd thing is that I do not get shocked by some of the very troubling things you see when you do some kind of Human Service work so it kind of gives us an advantage and you know be able to connect with people cuz we get the violence and we get the trauma we get to substance abuse and we get the the you know by the police or something it personally are we know of it in the other thing I wanted to say about that is that on McBride catch my train of thought War II was that people from the punk scene you know people who are who are in various police and police about you know turn is Amanda autonomy and mutual support I mean what is more punk rock and what is more alarm at those believe that having a role where you provide Mutual support to others who are struggling and to be able to have that in my professional life where I work as a peer mental health counselor but also have that in my personalized my social life when I meet people when I travel and whoever right she was on the phone and just got over being part of your people who described, and they actually what I’m doing is providing Mutual support for people when does Cabarrus situations where they can be really like I have a very very much in line with my beliefs of you know supporting each other and to Build a Better Community Building others better world so every day and it’s awesome and there’s way more than anyone knows and I want to help create strength in that community so we can all United in and also identifying the people out there who are allies to us whether they have the experience or not or whether they having to go help you know Spirits are trauma or addiction experience you’re not that allies the people who are also working Human Services many of them try to do this work a better place you know for their family member you know they make things better so I can also recognize that allies also that sometimes to a better because we protect ourselves and sometimes it’s because we we blocked at beneficial to us and I want you to just got back shed hear that that some allies or many allies are actually quite that they are allies to us and we can work together to make the world a better place and help each other and I aware of in the news or any you know anything going on so some people are just good people and whether there will come soon and not leave certain political ideologies or not they can be embraced and will want to embrace us and doing the work we’re doing and people here that because so many of us get pushed away and we naturally build up defenses to protect ourselves and it’s important to recognize that we do that could be of help to us and we should try to use our best to intuition I who those people are and see what we can come up with me see what kind of changes or improvements to our lives that we can wait and then approached with making the world a better place in different healthier for all of us right on. Yeah I totally feel that and if I’ve been on a similar path feeling like the nihilism and pessimism that’s sort of built into a lot of I mean if your punk that’s of a persuasion of just total apathy and eyelids and then you know when you come when you get into the the Revolutionary or insurrectionary activist modality of punk and then you get your ass kicked in the streets and you can’t be friends go to jail or you go to jail whatever you just get bludgeon and demoralized and disillusion and you said you had hope and now you’re actually more traumatized kind of like in The Matrix you know if The Cypher you know he wants to take back the disillusionment and just to be blissfully ignorant again and I think that we’re going to probably the punk rock element coming into does the social science in clinical psycho psychologie in of this kind of recovery and stare. Work I think they will end up introducing some sort of clinical terminology for the the condition that is becoming too too aware of the totality of if you when you start to look at the karmic consequences of living on the back being in the first row living on the backs of all of the ecologies and in economies as the other nations you know that are under the bootheel of of the West and all that you’re not just solving your own personal life family Karma and traumas that we’re actually living carrying the weight of the world here if you never if you’ve never cared about any of that stuff in your kind of just more of those completely apathetic Southampton pain it won’t heal still never affect you that that pain in that sense of responsibility and a sense of not being able to be content just fitting into society or just fitting into the sort of fashionable scenes and stuff because you’re like no I need to be resisting the size as my conscience has been awakened to the this expense entire Global disorder there’s so much additional, wounding baggage to inherit that that that disillusionment but then there’s also the gift within that of finding a sustainable way to be resisting and fighting back and you know but doing it figuring out a way to actually actually expresses your gift you know and end in from like a kind of typical spiritual kind of using thing as soon I was fine when you’re in you’re when you’re in the zone like if everyone who is fine is what puts them in the zone that’s a positive constructive creative self Transcendence you know purposeful activity weather is gardening or doing you know writting or writing poetry or doing volunteering or whatever it is if it’s something that’s not just serving your narcissistic ego I was just not going to get you very far but something that is help genuinely giving back in serving and it is something that you enjoy doing that’s where the real internal Pharmacy switches on and you become your own organic psychiatrist that medicine you know know and have a more and have a such a a reason to find those gifts in a reason you know to like we don’t have to pay once you get disillusioned and switch Sean you have to you can’t really sleep at night knowing that you’re part of this giant monstrosity of exploitation you got to figure out how to become more locally and regionally self-sufficient and sustainable and and how to make you said create Mutual Aid System all kinds of overlapping layers of mutual Aid so you can start to have more Independence and autonomy from the systems that are really perpetuating all this stuff so yeah I’m totally hopeful and in excited about about what is going to be like as you know we make the world a better place for everybody and his future Generations role in but also particularly with our own server tribe you know like I can imagine that honey I’ve started want to dedicate my life to making the next generation of people who do get disillusion whether to punk or whatever else give them more constructive and more sustainable ways to express that rage and to resist in ways that don’t you know get them in really trapped the way that I’ve been trapped in and peer pressure to do things that you say you know in certain ways unsustainable El Paso weather most people I believe who are being treated for mental health issues or trauma or addiction a mental health issues or addiction generally has to put a trauma either alongside what’s going on with them or has precipitated it and so when are the judges are made in the documents it written and diagnosis it diagnosis are given the trauma ask that’s what you may be the main source of the dysfunction or perpetuated or or or or Nursery in a negative way that the difficulties we were having or how we coach is often not even addressed during the whole truth, is the major component and often I just had precipitates you know the real the real I just kind of struggles who are basically labels and put in the box and told you this label this word is in this box and I’ll just medication in that this is your life is now it’s going to be and you know no one really care so that was my experience it’s a lot of parents that also wanted to say that I know we talkin about we we certainly have to acknowledge that this parts of the punk scene is people in the punk scene who absolutely have whatever reason I have a very apathetic stance I don’t care about politics are you know making a change in the world and in a way that maybe ice I might see our our our potential to do so however I think it’s also crucial pieces mind but also when we interact with others as far as finding common ground to meet at and not just compared to some people who are already feeling shunned or themselves from others for their own safety and that’s that these individuals to are very apathetic and you’d call him and get gas pump whatever we call them I mean something happened to them experience something like that maybe they were extinguisher made it more complicated for them really I mean we’re all the products of what we’ve experienced so individual for a community really must also be validated for the fact that they’ve experienced something real life most of what we don’t know about we have not had that conversation to add to this weekend we should be more empathetic and understanding understanding find common ground which would then reduce the result of individuals who are anti whatever it is we’re trying to do that you know Progressive so that are the way they are they do things the way that you would just say what they say because of their experiences and I would go very far as to say that in many situations are most people who acts in ways that are disruptive are or are against what is the collective real good reasons for doing that if if I don’t like it leave if you don’t like it or it’s not helpful to society they’ve experienced something in life that is informed them do to protect themselves or that manifest we have to acknowledge that that’s possible or potential explanation and when we do that we let me extend that massive amount of epithelia people instead of judging them in condemning them in and then you don’t know. and have their license because if that’s how it’s going to be and we can make that really at most empathetic wonderful decision to ourselves apart a to not engage that negativity cuz of that sells down and park Beauty must one another must one of us empathetic things we can do it’s not get into it with them and it is somebody is being destructive are there getting drunk out of his colon causing problems that are causing fights or whatever it is we get nothing out of it nothing out of well-being and wellness and Medical Health Center perpetuates already struggling struggling and suffering even if they’re wrong with me even if it’s wrong someone else do they care about that’s contrary to everything I believe in care about whether that means having really politics or whatever it is I understand that people are the products of their experiences and we do the things we do when we adapt and our brains and our minds how to defend ourselves to protect ourselves and I can get that I guess that very deeply as person lie and we will all be much happier if we eliminate some of that unnecessary conflict cuz it gets none of us are getting pissed off and alienated from our communities or from the community which really we all have a much more in common as to how she even with each other then the differences I wanted to make that clear that that’s really where I come from on that comment about you know that is this sustainable living and living a healthier Life by not impacting those who are less LIRR the providers of a lot of our services and and foods and ends in a situation that existed as many people want to be treated right in my my actions don’t always make decisions that are the life of those people who know I cannot directly speed at impact and I want to just put on the record here that I’m aware of that and I want to be better about it recovery of struggle and just keep myself going there today at the massive full-time job as I think you understand as well and maybe the listing will get and I have work to do to make sure that I can have left of an egg impact on those in the world that I can’t see your hair at night I think crucial to be accountable for our word that our actions and that’s something that overtime I hope I can make more adjustments to really be able to be more to adhere more to my beliefs of a really not harming anybody and I’m glad you brought that up because it made me realize that yes I have a lot of work to do as far as living that life that I believe would be beneficial to all of us if we’re able to actually apply it in the garage for our lives to thank you for bringing up that point and I’m grateful that you share that and it was in this conversation describe reconciling differences between the different camps in punk rock if that’s what’s so amazing in in in well stated and even going back to Axiom days and I was just like a teenager if your right eye it was a lot of lot of conflict a lot of some sort of psychic and even physical conflict in show environments and and scenes and stuff we’re more energy was spent fighting each other than fighting assistance in a lot of cases and I I think I honestly secretly was envious of the the Hedonism most of total telepathy and so there is jealousy there and envy you can’t be no be having a good time cuz I’m pissed off cuz I’m studying all this stuff about how the world’s screwed up and I’m going to make you more miserable and not acknowledge your the truth of your life experience and there’s this whole very malignant growth of the people that hyper intellectual elitist view PC vs whatever street punks are cast bunk’d whatever and then and then and then they rebelled against their like hey we got because we were sick of rules and now you’re telling us we have to have all these rules fuck you you know it’s Dynamic Anna and I really obviously I think she has somewhere in the middle is is is the middle the Watercourse Way you know it’s like between the extremes of Pleasure and Pain is you know where we want to have a baseline of homeostasis mentally and yeah I just wanted to throw out the or ask you if you have any thoughts about the pathology like the Psychopathology of of being the feeling like you know a lot of the more conscious or where people using that as a way to put people down and actually yeah add to their wounds not acknowledge where they’re coming from and I mean I don’t want to name name names of particular movements that I think has the issues very kind of full-blown but I think you can imagine how they’re are you know they’re really just morally Superior elitist and that is more division more ego foundries and stuff and not likely not actually changing either really engaged and lots of call clicks then it all back then what was called and that never should have been there really hard dry Community Honda other people I slid in the other than my spells and very very unfortunate and I really was desperate for percept insight as I said I grew up in group homes and I didn’t really have the kind of life that that would have really prepared me for the world appears and you know what I was very much my maturity level was was it over the years and I was traveling I really called by the barriers and tell the conflicts that didn’t need to be there and I suffered a lot and if you looked into it and and you know it to the late 2000s and what I really begin my recovery process and you know I miss you guys but hit rock bottom and it was either liver die and I chose to try one last time to get better and I’ll be starting to get better than me really struggling through it that I laid it happening is an interesting someone I want to share this cuz it won’t hear the last thing about that is that the with you that the people who buy and most in the most contempt from and the most abusive toward me what are the people who are the PC pumps and tanks and the elitist you know ya 2000 error get out new hardcore punk Center that pumps and I mean completely different person will not allow me when I when I when I really I recognize that the PC and all those people were not my friends at all and really did not give a crap about me except I was a good L I was just fodder for the for the internet message boards that the people who really embraced see people the people who are the people who you know you know we’re all grown up punk rockers and and and Let It Go who works in a PC who said things that like you know harmed and Ed Embrace fully and with no issue and many majority actually of the PC and just send me an actively participating and end in not treating me well and increasing with disrespecting a lack of understanding and it’s just that people who are you know very much in the PC crowd anarcho-punk crowd and all of those people that they have reasons why they stick together that way and that’s how they express myself and I think most of those people are very insecure and need to be a part of a pack to be able to feel feel like that’s what I don’t like how I’m treated sometimes and understand that people do what they do that kind of life and I’m not going to condemn them to it looks like good friends are not from the PT anarcho-punk Brad they are people that a lot of people might not necessarily has the best picture say about Grace to me I’ve been supportive and nurturing me it was there for me when the very people who like and I work really take responsibility for me what does beef to make peace and I’m really generally you feel pretty comfortable you know people don’t know who see my issue I don’t I don’t take it personally realize that people do and say what they do because they had experiences or whatever they had going on their life they haven’t spoiled them to act that way and I do my very best that I’m not perfect I make mistakes but I do my very best to embrace that reality that people act in certain ways into things to say things because of their experiences and then I’m not going to feel bad about it and lock it up. I’m going to try out that at the reasons why and I may not have any idea what those reasons are and they have to do with insecurities are or like mob mentality but really doesn’t matter cuz I know I’m better off into it and they want say what they want and you know what else we going to get up and be healthy life and grasses that those people left my life or are they want to embrace me wholeheartedly and it’s very interesting that that this is what I experienced as I continue to experience a punk rocker you can imagine and if you want to talk about giving the and that’s good enough for me and doesn’t matter to me is there a PC pong or chaos pong or a skinhead of whatever variety or whatever because whatever reason walk up to that talk Siri speak about my experiences of what I’ve been through and I like them in my life better that tells me that they get it we have something in common and that even a society as often to devenish answering people for certain things that they say and do I don’t want to do that I want to stay on estate I embrace you because I recognized that whatever it is that would also saying about your battery this is that is that really you just suffered he had a tough life and things weren’t fear and you just do the best you could you survive and treating people badly or say horrible things but I understand all that stuff all over here is all those decisions are directly impacted by Twila Paris and at things that happened that I can’t possibly know about and I’m not going to condemn. Just like I don’t want to be condemned by others as I felt so much in my life being torn down by others and other people so very complicated social life is complicated your boss seems a very specialized Punk scene that is pretty much you have to understand that you can have a cheer like crust punk shows and whatever they called TV now and I will spare part of this crew in this guy’s not so often is so sexualized but I try to get the gauge of anybody who wants to talk and I don’t really care healing moments of the saying yeah I get it you’re fucked up I get it it happened so you want to do what do you want to go from here to honoring appreciating sake so cold so cold more like Street Punk kind of Cloud V I was just checking with anthropologically studying different shows and you know during all over and stuff and there is something sacred about the circle pit and that that that’s Been to Spain by Spinoza different more old-school types of pumpkins where you were there and that’s like a really it’s like a it’s like a putting the the mind on spin cycle in a washing machine is this total punk rock group exorcism I study Tantra and and different Pharmacy you know spiritual Traditions from India and China and stuff and it’s like purification and releasing you know the the energies that are negatives that attach to a sin that act like vampires and want to create more misery and suffering in the world and our happy tooth are you happy to disguise themselves in a variety of different ways people are just accepting and tolerating this extremely toxic amount of negative emotional poisoning that is going on in them in their bloodstreams constantly with all of the Slime Wars on forms and stuff just all of this on cerebro and disconnected from the heart like just noise of conflict that that that just becomes this norm and you go into like an activist meetings or even like a house meeting at a supposedly enlightened you know Community House Savannah kiss or a ton of people and people are just waiting to tear each other apart and just create more more hell and more suffering and and Mori girl in more Agony and around all that stuff and it’s nice since I’ve gotten into more different esoteric Traditions that acknowledge you know that John the human psyche is so sort of inhabited space where the things that are making our lives hell or actually like discrete entities are organisms that are subsisting off of our energy and functioning on a plane of existence that are not visible to our to our normal five senses so with psychedelic Shamanism in different forms of deep meditation and even like with Tantra is it did the use of sexual energy as as a medicine for purification and in as a way to like this loss exercise these energies these entities Better Living inside of our energy Fields this is an interesting Dimension that I’m really getting deep into bringing back I think both of us have spray and stay out of the sort of punk rock ghetto to seek answers and health and healing for Purcells and now we have gifts that were bringing without any agendas or authoritarian elitism with it but it’s hey this work for me check it out less judgment Less elitism in criticism and write this is the scientific directions that I’m trying to take the clinical psychotherapeutic or psychological approach to a lot of healing traditions of the East that are more symbolic and not even just be supposed to say traditional pre-modern shamanic modes of healing where there’s an understanding of the spirit world and that human beings are basically extremely vulnerable and extremely defenseless especially alone if a human being who is estranged from the orb of healing love light energy that is an intact tribe or Village of people living in Us in an intact natural habitat that’s the molecules of human mental health a baseline of mental health and it’s it’s maintained by shamanic practice tennis go to mediation between the negative forces in the spirit world and his desire of human populations to maintain a state of homeostasis where we’re all loving each other from birth to death know everyone has a purpose everyone is is given sexual access and affection this age appropriate and is abundance throughout their life and then the physical materials security and ecological security is there because in our traditional past as hunter-gatherers you know and then and its various forms of Horticultural societies you know there was at intactness and a couple minutes and then you just literally don’t see the some massive pathologies of organized Warfare and violence then suicide and incest and all these horrific pathologies to the shaman it’s the infection of weekend populations and weekend individuals of these demonic entities that are always there and always Genetically speaking cracks and fractures in our population has been in our individual minds and when drama happens cultural trauma or intergenerational trauma of all kinds we basically become so weak and in so susceptible is like we have psychic HIV or psychic immune deficiency and we’re overrun by these demonic entities that it’s just they’re just happy to disguise themselves as as our personality so we identify with them and say yeah I am this label and the the really hyper elitist intellectual cerebro activist movement people and I was one of them I was really like sharp so I could really hurt people with my voice you know I could really make people feel bad about themselves and so I I was addicted to that and I was totally ignorant and in delusion about it because I thought ya and this is how I’m healing the planet and I’m making a little better place mean well I’m basically becoming an instrument of that same negativity going to like you said and you know some of the stuff is like really complex or esoterica you have to I mean I don’t think you need to face to explain the spirit world I think you can you can have a second traditional psychedelic shamanic ceremony of experience and and have a have a complete visual understanding of the impact of of different of these different things that are attached to a string attached to her thinking and basically pushing Us in farming or negative emotions and that’s getting closer through this Renaissance Inn in clinical psychedelic research studies for the restore of the medical youth legal category 4 for II LX has a different kinds we’re getting closer to this sort of new germ Theory which with which wood with when a microscope with able to with able to discover basically and implicate microbes as the source of of infectious disease the Psychedelic perspective is like the microscope for the for the psyche and for the the sort of structure of the invisible structure of the larger human energy field and being able to look into that and study and explore that with this cool as the Psychedelic medicine is giving giving us an understanding now that can be really revolutionize the the mental health industry and be able to say this word for instance when you have that perspective you can actually see that these medications that people being drugged on the pharmaceutical industrial complex is like spelling and pushing people are actually weakening people’s physical and mental immune system so that they become susceptible to even greater degree of infection and that’s where all this really extremely psychotic side effects are coming in and because we still are in a medical cert is impurity that it ignores the spirit world biggest say that all those are just eating disordered neurons that are somehow being bumped into by this chemical but in fact there’s too much more Sinister thing going on and that you wouldn’t the punk rock mix. Silver Lake West Bismark fist anti-religion anti spirituality total denial of the spirit world because we’re so traumatized by religion you know it’s taking me a long time to relieve have to get a new education on like what what mental illness it really actually is in it and how Commons in various cultures traditional look at these issues in and crying your help for them I see now that what I was blind to for many years that I just accepted because it was I was so blind and so diluted like everyone else in the PC World in the activist communities words if you bring a shaman into an activist meetings in and just have that woman or man with a sketch pads close their eyes scan the room with their third eye and make a sketch of what they see well all these people are just fighting over these Petty semantical things just extremely nasty Eagles assert assertion that is not connected to the heart and not acknowledging the the Oneness and this connectedness that a deeper level that everyone really has not really listening to people when they talk and just waiting till like Karen down with that actually appears like from a higher dimensional space with the people who are trained to be able to operate as surgeons like surgical Exorcist in that space with are going to see is that these people have become habitats for extremely nasty creatures that are able to hack into and spam their mind stream like you said and I need that negativity that grows it’s alive and it and it has is a dimension of an organism make a live Anna Sun another another dimensional plane of reality and so if you have zits and we just don’t we because we don’t normally see that we just take it for granted and just let it run everything and that is exactly what its agenda is and I love what you said about how like yeah you when you when you get so brutalized by that experience that you seek the heart and you go and find the people who didn’t have that type really Destino way of being and they are the ones with Open Hearts that are actually creating space or people that sit to accept each other and like not Take On The World and unsustainable Morley ABY this way but just try to be good people and try to do less harm and be present I had the same the same Journey I really appreciate that and I’ll come full circle back to the end yeah and it’s a PC struggling because people just really want to feel strong and secure and empowered and and this country through all that different things that happened with the military being in Syrian control and and media control and absolutely true pharmaceutical companies which you know I’m not I’m not going to I’m not going to sit and some people benefit from their medication and some don’t know I’m very careful to not say you like I’m either a medication because I I do take the summer off and not entirely sure that I needed and stirring trying to taper off and I’ve already had two doing up sometime but I want people to be able to feel I want to hear that it’s okay to take steps to help yourself and you know our society has is very much very pressuring and very forceful and raised. Smells like Menthol and very unforgiving and I want to get people to know that you know when we are faced with the trauma and addiction that we can serve ourselves and support those around us and helping others make the most informed decisions about how to deal with what they’re struggling with and I wanted people to be careful but can getting medication cuz some people may benefit from it and others can disagree or other and that’s fine I respect those people to a lot of people the reason are Jarritos hurt less than that and feel better and be more stable and successful in life in life and it’s really important for me to know what it is and just because I believe one thing about how to deal with things with my life doesn’t mean that’s right for someone else and get the best thing we can do for those people and I spell it does appear as a friend as a community member I thought you would make the most informed decisions about what to do about their struggle what to do about their information possible to decide to make an informed decision on what they want to do and what major should I choose may be different than another that person might choose to take medication and and meditate and exercise and another person might choose to you no good acupuncture and swim 5 miles a day in only eat a certain specific diet and and go to your house with another person like say I want to see a therapist but I want to only see a psychiatrist who is under the age of thirty who’s recently trained at school and University of the newest techniques has been informed about recovery and information possible which will result in a much better prognosis I think I don’t want to say that take religion III come from a fairly impressive religious background night my feelings Jewish and you know I’m always going to recognize that is 70 benefits from being religious spirituality and of course we recognize that our religion can include spirituality and not be religious so I do respect this Puppy Bowl at my work if you believe in God and pray and you know what I validate that and that’s going to help him get through the day even if my opinion of that help or not may be different it’s irrelevant because my job is to be supportive and helpful. I was really like to believe that God was just this thing I was going to help me and gave me a Higher Learning very much the hard way that that wasn’t the case I’m an atheist now or maybe more like a tent again you know I respect that people do what they do for whatever reason and I don’t want to condemn anybody for making a decision this different than what I believe as far as will you take medication or not you believe in God and not for you or you just help yourself or not even say it was that you mentioned a few minutes ago about your Chanley aware that you’re into that could be used to really cost I don’t want the one I used the wrong word but harm to others and I’m well aware that I also have that similar but I know that intellectually I could use my knowledge and and words to just guesstimate somebody because I am as you can probably tell from this interview station skills that I understand this stuff and I have in it select that will that will allow me to really be that way and I have to work very hard when I’m upset at people or angry people to not use that that little part of my brain that to be so Sinister and malicious because that’s not how they had to live my life and I have to be aware that I fixed her and think sometimes there’s a person with trauma in the struggle that I’ve had that it could be easy to let go and just want somebody to what I consider valuable in my life preserve and including must not in anyway you don’t go looking for complex and must not in anyway participate or feed the fire of a college because just because intellectually I could be an ass yeah man oh well yeah I think we definitely has a lot more to cover and will continue you know what other dialogue I’m going for sure and yeah I think I really like the inclusive shirt of the words you’re using I really empowering to to you know open-hearted and inclusive and accepting I want to acknowledge it is as you said very important to accept everyone where they’re at and I like what you said just getting to the Dayman really that that is what we’re all trying to do and and I see it’s the under that they say namaste acknowledging the Divine and everyone you see and and your similar likeness to them and really speaking at Divine and all things and in keeping your mind open to the truth it’s difficult when free sample we’re taking on these things the pharmaceutical. Show complex yet there’s the Paradox that you can’t just take it away in and have nothing there and you can’t make someone feel bad if they don’t have an alternative and maybe you know it’s it’s it’s a transitional saying it’s going to take a long time to take still took ten thousand years to create this absolute planetary disaster it’s not going to be fixed overnight going to take a long time to heal and and I think the the best thing that we with the punk rock ethics can bring to all forms of whether it’s psychiatric or do differences as a therapy and healing and Recovery is bringing the ethic that itch I think your people should professionals who are providing service should make a living and should be and should be to make it an honorable and decent living that Society acknowledge is the value of and help support and and that ultimately with Society valuing the work that you’re doing and the stuff that I do and other people then it can become more accessible and more available and with more severe access and it’s me know if this capitalistic hierarchy of wealth and privilege and access you know everybody is suffering we all need love and so there’s no so there’s no substitute for Love Is No Love in a pill form the love has to be through the relationship with your community and your family and your you know your romantic Partners in a nature and spirit and you know the divine all that stuff and there’s many different from weight Pathways and cultures are actually like bun all these different ways to have a have entitlement to access love and meaning in connection to the things that are going to keep us happy and healthy and yes we can bring more access than more fair opportunity resources It Whatever all this interventions that that are maybe transitional that we’re having to work with you know whether it’s the pharmaceutical medications or like you know for example you’re flying to Peru to go to the Amazon to spend weeks or months then beeps your vacation ceremony with Ayahuasca shamans and stuff like that that even as transitional because that’s not really sustainable or or local for people and it’s very limited access to people with privilege the punk rock’s. Let’s hack this stuff and Liberate the Technologies and make people in power with DIY Solutions you know and and and just make make it so there’s there’s that we provider on alternative options that are more affordable and and more you know have have integrity to whatever we choose minimizing the feeling of spelling out to anything that we don’t feel like we have integrity with everybody’s fighting a battle and we’ll all be a lot happier when we don’t contribute to perpetuate to that person’s battle or the suffering and instead if we can be understanding and empathetic and choose to not further their own suffering at you not bring us something to the effect of suffering you know we have that control and we must make that choice for her to do what’s right and I’m trying to help bring that that that that way of thinking around and make you go to listen because I believe that happiness and satisfaction for everyone in the world I mean I just wanted to ask if I could is there a website for people before we say goodbye today yeah please do and how come people follow up and get ahold of you thank you about one of my books is called better days and mental health recovery workbook which is a pump that you just people coping skills and the other is a book called you’re crazy which has the first volume at 27% accounts of people from the pump being who you are talking with her experiences with mental health drug addiction and Trauma currently have to call the contribution volume to are you crazy I just have to include people first hand accounts being mean and dealing with addiction and Trauma www.com Center calvary.com so www.bunk1.com and other coping skills workbook can be found at BWW bettordays recovery.com but it is recovery.com and there are sample worksheets and. Seuss on that pays you can download and see for yourself in if we might benefit from coming off my benefit from it at least turn them on to it thank you so much for this opportunity that has been great to speak with you definitely look forward to speaking with you again soon in the future and I’ve been my honor and pleasure to speak with you as much love and respect and up the punx else will talk to you next time to the touch of Time Podcast please go to www.crunch.com and cook on the Donate button to help support the show in addition is to see me and improving the podcast for donations will help establish permaculture goddess Temple every bite ecological employment for single mothers Please Subscribe and share your favorite episodes if you have questions or comments feel free to leave a voicemail at 818-275-1593 or email event at Township Park. Com namaste